I AM 100% IN CHARGE OF THE NASDAQIRI

You can pretend that my winship is a consequence of luck or happenstance. The truth is far less complicated than your moat of disbelief.

I control all of the NASDAQS, for they are mine and Exodus is a gift to a generation of spoiled brats, hamstrung by psychotropics and a sense of entitlement not seen since the Gilded Age.

I’ve ballooned my position in CYBR, once again, depleting all available cash–leaving me running in the wind, naked, freely spirited amongst the wolves, rocks, and peace doves.

The bastards from Wall Street 2.0 blew up your brokerage accounts again, in a sublime manner. There’s no doubt as to the panache and style of the zerohedge volcano squad, tirelessly toiling away with diabolical news clippings by their side.

Why, this time, at least you thought, was going to be different. Six years worth of central bank planning was going to be undone by feta cheese eating grape farmers. All of the stocks you sold short were going to zero and the world was heading into a Chinese-Greek led grande depression.

Now look at you, disheveled, naked, fucked, forked radish.

I don’t give a shit about stocks today. I’ve decided to live the life of leisure I was born to lead– at least for today.

What is Le Fly doing on such a Tuesday afternoon, in the midst of a gorilla raping rally?

So sorry, that’s classified.

But feel comfort in knowing that he is enjoying the fruits of his labour and–thoroughly–comporting himself, graciously, in victory, just as effortlessly as he comports himself in defeat.

If I cared, I’d advise you to lead similar lives, sucking off the silver chalice of defeat with equanimity; but I couldn’t care less, so the whole lot of you can bugger off and slip into cracks of the earth–ending up on milk cartons and shit.

Listen up frog-faces: we’ve just enjoyed the best three day run of 2015, all the while the cabal of zerohedge sacrificed portfolios all in the name of their satanic cult leader: Bluestar.

It’s important that you know that Exodus nailed the oversold again. Meanwhile, back at the farm, pigs are eating slop and luring in unsuspecting persons of a weaker demeanor into their jars of jam and jelly.

GOOD NEWS EVERYONE: I’ve secured Josh Brown aka Reformed Broker to guest speak at the 2nd annual iBankCoin conference.

The bad news is, if you fuckers don’t start buying tickets now, I am going to have to cancel the event. We will not make money on it and last year almost killed me, dealing with the logistics and stress factor. So, if you’re going to buy a god damned ticket, but haven’t received your welfare check from the government yet, email me to reserve a spot for you: [email protected]. This is for serious inquiries only. If ticket sales do not begin to pick up, I will be refunding everyone who paid, eat large losses, and move on and never, ever organize a conference for you dick-handlers again.

Fucking assholes.

I bought nefarious car rental agency, EHIC, despite 30% of the Shanghai composite not trading for the past week–because the mood was dour. I am in it for the win, Chinese style, executing the ‘iron lotus’ upon my enemies.

In light of CAR-T names taking off again, I am long BLCM, small size, waiting for some momo action.

I sold out of SEM and CMCM, one for a small loss, the other for a large win.

For the past hour, I’ve tried to find some place for the proceeds. I cannot.

I am stuck in the amber of indecision. With the market already up 200 and everyone circle jerking about the NASDAQ exchange, I think it’s best if I’d refrain from adding into the tape. The prudent move is to lock in gains, clean out the losers, and ride your good stocks forward.

As you know, “The Fly” is a person of extreme prudence and decorum.

It’s very nice to see futures up the way they are. However, need I remind you there is a July 20th bond payment due in Greece and they’ve yet to pass this deal through parliament and the EU has yet to loan them a shilling? I didn’t think so.

It’s very possible that the whole deal falls apart and markets go right back down the toilet bowl.

Or, it’s entirely possible that a deal does get done and the shorts go down the toilet bowl.

These are the choices you have to make before allocating resources to the market. It’s what makes a market.

Personally, I’ve been amused by the Chinese stock market, immensely. Those crazy bastards are full tilt, coked out and strung out– long shit. None of their companies have reliable audited results. It’s a game of smoke and trap doors, amidst shadows and funhouse mirrors–complete and utter shit. Having said that, I hope my CMCM does well today.

ANAC is through the roof because of positive data. This goes to show you, no matter how expensive biotech gets, it can always get a little crazier. We are living during a time of technological breakthrough in both engineering and science. You’d be remiss if you didn’t own at least one biotech pinless hand grenade. Right now my frag weapon of choice is ONCE.

Let’s see how this fucker opens and let’s try to refrain from pre-mature celebratory champagne openings into the faces of bears.

The Exodus educational trailer is here.