Just When I Thought I Was Out, FOMO Pulled Me Right Back the Fuck In

After I sold my pastiche of inverse ETFs, I thought I’d stay in cash like a good boy, well disciplined — very Austrian like. That lasted all but 15 mins, and then I got FOMO, and then I razored myself right back into the cut, allocating ~50% of my assets into nonsense.

The net result was a gigantic circle jerk. I made back all of my losses from the inverses — but now own a bunch of nonsense into tomorrow’s guillotine. Bog standard, I’d gather my luck is running short — up 300% for the year — shitting on your local fund manager. The stock Gods prefer to lure winners back into the fold, make them feel comfy, just prior to slicing off their cocks and their heads.

I used to crave adversity because I thought it made me stronger, leaner, grittier. Now I just want peace and equanimity and endless wins on top of wins on top of wins.

I closed out my inverse ETFs for a total loss of 20bps. I have been paralyzed by today’s divergence, weak breadth, DOWN SMALL CAPS, surging large caps. This is, without a doubt, a hard tape to read. But more than that is my desire for the complete destruction of the American economy. Let the people reap what they sowed, guillotines bloody in the City Square, hungrily awaiting its next host.

I am 100% cash, holding my dick in one hand and a cup of coffee in another.

Yesterday I got the idea in my head that it was over. I cleared out my positions and truly put my money where my mouth was and bought inverse ETFs. Knowing full well this was likely a stupid idea, I kept 80% cash to avoid the likelihood that I was about to fuck myself.

Lo and behold, as God is my witness, I fucked myself.

Full disclosure: I own SOXS, LABD, SQQQ, and FNGD — because owning SQQQ wasn’t good enough. I needed direct exposure to Apple, Facebook, Netflix and Google.

Markets are now ripping. But I got to be honest with you, I don’t see it. There is no strength in smaller names. All of the gains is concentrated amongst larger capped stocks. This, of course, might be another trap I am laying for myself, the root of a psychosis to make me believe danger is imminent — when it fact we are seeing merely more of the same BULLTARD movements to the upside.

At least my LABD is higher and my entire basis isn’t too poor. Net net, I am only down 10bps on this whole thing. See, there I go again — trying to convince myself this bad trade might turn around.

What I need to do is close these out and begin anew — pick overpriced pieces of shit for rapid fire trades to satiate an audience of craven money grubbing monsters.

More on this later.

The only explanation for today is, like the polio vaccine that Russia invented back in the 50s when no one believed them and shit on it initially, people low key believe Putin and that his daughter has been irrevocably inoculated from the horrors of COVID-19 and its 0.4% kill rate.

Here is the logic.

Markets love crack. The only reason we are smoking it now is because of lockdown. Once the lockdown ends, FAIRYLAND no longer exists and reality seeps thru the facade. Behind the facade of furloughs and temporary lay offs is monstrous ugliness. Once that is exposed, Apple will drop 40%.

Once the stimulus ends, markets crack like an egg.

As such, RATES SOARED today, with the 10yr up 8bps. That should not have happened with the Nasdaq lower by 190. Both gold and silver diving like this also speaks to no more Fed printing.

I mean, silver was down 14%. Pay attention to the details.

I cleared out my accounts today and am all short, with 80% cash.

The irony of Putin first to market with a COVI-19 vaccine is rich with humor. Over the past few hours, just about every medical expert on the west trashed it — sounding more like VAXXERS than people who want to actually see a vaccine for COVID-19 come to fruition. The level of butt-hurt, seeing the evil Russians invent one first, is on a monumental scale.

But because of this, in spite of the fact that ZERO people will take it, stocks are steaming ahead. It wasn’t like that earlier, with the Nasdaq lower by more than 100. Since then, that ugliness has been erased and now everything is up. The theme is normalization, with airlines, cruise ships, credit card companies and the likes roaring ahead.

More interesting is the SPIKE in rates — the 10yr up to 0.65% and there utter COLLAPSE in silver — off by 10%. Gone are the days of risk off. We are now pricing in +10% GDP and FULL employment.

Restaurant stocks are gapping higher and just about anything consumer facing. Nothing can stop the optimism, unless of course you look at the grim stats and come to realize that many of the 55 million Americans will be PERMANENTLY unemployed.

We’ve adapted to the personless COVID-19 world quite well, automating just about everything. We do not need employees, but more robots.

My trading has been light, but flawless today.

DUST +11.5%
TPR +3.5%
RGS +3.5%
SHAK +2.5%
RVLV +1.4%

I’m now 75% cash, waiting for the lull of the afternoon to pass, in order to execute a few more transactions in the hopes those trades will pay for my country club initiation fees for my new tennis obsession. I will have you know, I am progressing quite well and all of the mechanics are coming into place. I will be a tennis pro inside 6 months.

You knew it was going to happen. Peter Schiff on Joe Rogan. Gold bulls out on CNBC talking extremely greasy about the dollar, jerking themselves off to HARD CURRENCY. Old Gloom and Doomers circa 2008 back in Youtube to warn people about the coming storms. Spiritually, gold bugs are vapid losers, hell bent on end of days. Financially speaking, although right since 2000, these people have been cryo-frozen since 2008.

Since then the iPhone had been invented and modern finance turned on its fucking head — yet here were are discussing the Fed and how fucked they are. Pray tell me, when will said chickens come home to roost? I am getting dreadfully tired of waiting for it to happen.

Silver is off by 5%, gold is -2%. Le Fly steps into today long DUST — a true market maven and champion amongst unwashed plebs.

I have to be somewhere in a half hour and this fucking market is bananas. We were down 150 NASDAQ, and now barely 20. The Dow is surging and small caps are +2%. Meanwhile, my DUST position is firming and SOXS is barely down — a bet against the semis.

Every fiber in my body says to fade the tape; but that’s been suckers bets since March.

Until I am ready to sit down and get a grip on things, I’ll remain 70% cash.

Pennies and small caps are mostly higher, more than 1%, while larger cap stocks do nothing. The Dow is higher by 200+ and the Nasdaq is off by 40. The rotation we’re seeing today is out of FAANG and into piece of shit mortgage and other low market cap offal.

While I do enjoy this form of speculation, I have a keen sense of uneasiness right now and it has washed over me like an electric current. I am partially disappointed and partially sickened by my current pastiche of “winners” and might clean them out shortly.

Gold and silver are higher, which is only adding to my angst, since I own DUST. Other than that, more than 50% cash — waiting for something to pounce on.

Holy shit the biggest news no one gives a fuck about. In the past we laughed at the plight of JC Penny’s and Sears for being old fucktards and for letting Amazon shit on their faces year in and year out. Well, thanks to the COVID-19 scourge, Amazon is now in talks to acquire both JC Penny and Sears shit-stores in order to convert them into fulfillment centers.

You can’t make this shit up. I suppose the rest of the mall can become condos and SHIT-TIER restaurants, and maybe etch out some square footage for Barstools merchandise. Other than that, put a fork in them.

Nasdaq futs are a no show, slight strength in commodities, and ETH cannot get past $400 to save its life. A real nothing burger tonight, other than of course the excitement of trading this clown show tomorrow morning.

Just prior to the global fucking meltdown, I had an excellent exercise regimen going. NO BOOZE, NO CARBS, NO FUN ever. I was a fucking machine, who just lifted heavy objects and ingested large doses of protein. I was at the gym until the very end — and then LOCKDOWN hit us and I’ve been loafing ever since. I tried working out at home — but it’s just not the same. Biking here is fucking untenable with the NC hills that are designed to torture people. I have never been a runner, ever since I got shin splints from playing KICK EACH OTHER IN THE SHINS AS HARD AS WE CAN game with my friends, as a moronic teenager.

So I’ve been relegated to long walks and I hate them because I am naturally athletic and enjoy sport.

I didn’t want to play golf — because golf is for old fat retards, so I joined tennis and have signed up for lessons.

I haven’t played tennis in 20 years and my skills we never honed. I am of course a NATURAL ATHLETE and can perform without lessons, but being in my mid 40s now, encroaching on the death years to the grave, I wanted to get it right, accomplish good form and truly “look good” while playing. There is nothing worse than someone playing who looks bad.

Since the courts are at 50% capacity and it’s one thousand degrees here, there is a small window from which to grab a court here, unless of course you pay for lessons. Then you can have a court whenever the hell you feel like it.

As my lessons continue, I will of course appraise you of my progress, so that you might live vicariously through a person, such as myself.