THE PARTY IS BACK

Nothing can stop us now. It appeared like there was some apprehension heading into the ass end of last week. Let me assuage your concerns presently. We have bottomed, for now, and have nothing but green fields ahead. Feel free to remove your clothes and run the fields nakedly, without a concern in the world.

I am up by around 80bps and would like to be up a lot more. Therefore, and this goes without saying, I bought more. I could’ve just stayed in cash after this morning’s sales and feel wonderful amidst splendor and gains, safe in the bosom of cash. Alas, I greedily and hastily prepared buy orders in new stocks for new adventures — because my mind wandered off into the wilderness of grandiosity and made me believe in hope without change.

Overall, markets are somewhat flaccid and cryptos have reached out from the grave with signs of life. I am eternally optimistic about my fortunes, therefore I come here to talk my book and hope that me writing these things can manifest into reality.

As I’ve mentioned here innumerable times, I am bullish on ETH long term. I have been buying it every month for more than a year and it just so happens the prices have gone up for about 9 months straight. All of that shit is about to change. The recent degeneracy in cryptos have taken on a comical level and I am afraid there isn’t anywhere to go but lower, for now, in order to WASH OUT the fuckheads who just ruined the party for the rest of us.

I will demonstrate my evidence with several pieces of content below.

TikToker makes ‘scamcoin’ as a joke and within an hour it’s worth ~$70mln lmao. pic.twitter.com/dmEAdNUG6Z

— TikTok Investors (@TikTokInvestors) April 22, 2021

pic.twitter.com/r51ylWUvc3

— TikTok Investors (@TikTokInvestors) April 23, 2021

Mans turned $68k into $500k in ~5 days by investing only in crypto memes ?. #safemoon pic.twitter.com/dqN6OeZcDk

— TikTok Investors (@TikTokInvestors) April 21, 2021

I present to you the average Safemoon analyst. pic.twitter.com/hkoD6keZyl

— TikTok Investors (@TikTokInvestors) April 20, 2021

While everyone’s hoping for $1 we have our sight set on $1k for dogecoin. #DogeDay pic.twitter.com/XfuxTx4j2v

— TikTok Investors (@TikTokInvestors) April 19, 2021

? #dogecoin pic.twitter.com/msTI3bm0pN

— TikTok Investors (@TikTokInvestors) April 19, 2021

Cumrocket coin surges 634% in single day as market cap breaks $140 million.

What the actual fuck… ? pic.twitter.com/VslsdLqXYl

— Mr. Whale (@CryptoWhale) April 22, 2021

Fuck all of those people above. I have never seen this sort of shit happen without an extreme reversion to the mean. As you noticed in recent days, BTC-ETH and all of the “real” projects are suffering with price declines — because everyone is being lured into fucking pancake swap to ride one of these perverted money trains. Well guess what fucked face — it’s gonna end badly. Only after the DOGECOIN is destroyed and the SAFEMOON genre of investor is dead can we get back to normal. My best guess, which is very hard with cryptos, is another 3 months of basing out to lower prices.

In other news, I present to you the IKEA guy.

Part 1 of all of them pic.twitter.com/xIj9uvccYc

— Scott Seiss (@ScottSeiss) April 20, 2021

Part 2 of all of them pic.twitter.com/9CjyC6EoCz

— Scott Seiss (@ScottSeiss) April 20, 2021

Scrooge meets Jeff Bezos #WinterSolstice #HolidaySeason #Scrooge #JeffBezos #Christmas pic.twitter.com/TnCXDiVVs4

— Scott Seiss (@ScottSeiss) December 21, 2020

What a tumultuous week. Over the weekend I had visions of grande wins, followed up by an even greater feeling of equanimity. Instead, I got whipsawed and a good friend of mine died from alcoholism. His organs failed and he died with his mother by his bedside. I haven’t seen him in 9 years but I felt like we were still close — shared memories and ballgames from another lifetime. Casual drinking is often celebrated as something to do — because Gatsby parties and good times and all of the fine things that go with it. Truth is, it’s a bad trade, lest you do it infrequently and for the right reasons. As an adult, if you’re still drinking to get drunk — consider a different stimulant to pass the time — such as caffeine.

The past three years have been incredibly painful for me, losing people that I loved. I tend to believe we all peak at different ages, some of us in high school, others much older. We all have passions and a fire that keeps our energy high and motives pure. But when disappointment settles in and time slows down — too many people spiritually give up.

I fight the black dog just like many of you. Strong thinkers tend to sulk about things and create almost a fog in the way they see things. For me, this is physically true. I see thru a narrow fog, beard grows, and I become engrossed in a deep sense of dread. But I am resilient and snap out of it — working, gym, trading, tennis, reading, iBankCoin, etc.

As for markets, I made +240bps for the session, closed at 21% cash, bullish for Monday.

I was supposed to be out. The market was toasted, after Jim Biden’s rumor of annihilating all investors, especially the SHITCOIN fucked for brains — marble heads. But alas, a new day brings forth new vigor and ferocity. We are climbing now as if it were Jan of 2021 and nothing can stop it.

The Gods favour the bold and the beautiful. Since I resemble an Orc, I can only admit to you they prefer my boldness.

Having said that, I threw away my hedges at the open and climbed up the ladder and DOVE RIGHT THE FUCK IN. As it happens, it’s a long way down and I still haven’t hit the water yet. From my vantage point, it’s bright and glistening with the sun’s warmth. I imagine myself hitting the water and curving under and coming up refreshed and proud of my flawless form.

More on that later.

I am 70% in, mostly degenerate stock, higher by 2% for the day.

I’d like to forget about today. I went from +240bps to down 90bps, finished at -35bps. I basically hedged, sold everything, bought everything back and more — and closed out the day more confused than how I started.

Big assed new taxes is of course a negative for stocks. CNBC can eat a bag of dicks trying to spin this in a positive light. However, nothing is definite and we haven’t even heard the official news yet. For all we know, this is FAKE NEWS.

Long story short: a doubling of the cap gains tax will be RUINOUS for trading. Let’s hope Jim Biden isn’t that fucking stupid. If he is, then we have to get net short.

I had to drive my son to the airport and then run some fucking errands with Mrs Fly. While that happened, news hit the tape that Jim Fucking Biden wanted to HIKE cap gains taxes to 43% or higher for richer fucks. This might seem like nothing to you because you’re an idiot. But it is CATACLYSM.

Bear in mind, it was the idiot Bush who lowered cap gains during the pangs of the dot com collapse and then Trump lowered them some more and we all enjoyed glamorous gains. If cap gains is to DOUBLE, well then, FUCKED.

I had stepped back into the market before I left — because fun and games ha ha ha, suck my dick. But now I am regretting it and my 2% gains have dissipated to 0.2% and my appetite for risk is near zero. I feeeeel like shorting and I might do it. The only things that holds me back is the fact that it’s so obvious — so a Constanza trade might be in order.

We’ll see.

I’m thinking I’d best not press my luck, following a massive bump. I liquidated all but one position and now sit and watch to see and to make sure we have a follow through on yesterday’s rally. All too often during bad markets rip days are followed up with gaps higher and then collapse. The last thing I need is another collapse.

In other news, ETH is at record highs. I am bullish of course.

Most people seek their own downfalls thru superfluous caprices. They afford themselves luxuries and grow accustomed to them and with that newly found verve, recklessly curve their lives into an abyss. Life, sometimes, isn’t easy. And sometimes the cards we are dealt are dreadful — sickness, loss, bad luck are usually the underlying causes of deep melancholy.

But things do not have to go wayward, young chap. You can of course choose a different path. You can, instead of gouging your faces into pizza pies, opt to work out at the gym, eat healthy, and take up a clean avocation. Perhaps you’re low on funds — but are you also low on curiosity? You can quite literally envelope yourselves into a wonderful rich world of art and literature, the best achievements of mankind, right now. There are endless paths you can take to cure your doldrums. Watching movies is one thing — but have you tried to pursue true excellence in cinema? This must all sound obnoxious to some of you — but I don’t give a shit. One of you out there needs to hear this.

STOP DRINKING. It destroys men. Never ever drink while sad.

STOP EATING SHITTY FOODS. You find too much pleasure in the finer things in life. If it tastes too good — it’s bad for you so spit it out.

WORK HARD, at the gym and also in your career. If your career is shit — be frugal and save money and make smart choices with your money.

The relationships you have do not have to define you. They need not break your spirit and cause you to waste away into nothing. I am eternally bullish on mankind — because I can see past the grift and the pettiness and see wonderful things all around me. I am not a religious man — but if I was I would feel blessed for being able to live in these interesting times.

Cheers.

This will be my first of many victory claims here, regarding the mean reversion algorithms of Stocklabs, formerly Exodus.

We flagged on our RARE 6mo oversold algorithm yesterday and here we are today, ripping.

Shut up. I am not telling you this for new subscribers. WE ARE CLOSED TO ALL NEW CLIENTS for a period of perhaps months. I tell you this — not only because I can — but also to fulfill my quota of self-aggrandizement. Yes, I was long a pastiche of TRIPLE UPSIDE ETFs and yes I FESTOONED my portfolio was an array of runners this morning — thanks to our AWARD WINNING volume tools.

Some of my booked trades today

sold $SKLZ +16.2%, $MVIS +13%, $CAN +7%, $SOXL +5%, $DM +4.7%, $RIO -1.5%, $AZN +2.3%, $KO +0.7%, $ORCL -3.8%

There are more — but I don’t care too much about your opinions.

Bottom line: this is an oasis in a vast winding desert of shit. Be sure to take some gains off the table, or press the envelope if you can in order to extract maximum gains now — for the fires are still coming and the doom is certain to cast its ominous shadows over Wall before summer.

Thus far, I am +320bps for the session.

We are entreated to a bounce this morning, one which I hope sticks. Breadth is strong at 80% and all of the small capped stocks are participating. This of course could go sideways and lower — should the weak hands being to flee via margin liquidations later on today.

But it’s important to remember something on bounce days. These are temporary respites. The party isn’t back and will not return for the balance of 2021. You might get a month, if you’re lucky, of 2020-early 2021 trading action. But rest assured, money should be allocated into old man stocks on days like today, slowly but surely, preparing for the fires that are undoubtedly coming — burning bright and furious — reducing portfolios across the nation to cinders.