A WORD FROM THE FEDERAL RESERVE

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jywb7LyQn2k 603 500]

I was +1.25% today, spearheaded by DMND and SFLY.

Okay, this BVSN crap is out of control now. Someone, somewhere, is getting rich as hell, long this thing from the comfort of some smoke filled room, decked out in mahogany walls. Have a look.

Would I short BVSN here? Hell fucking no. You know me, I rarely short anything. This thing is a runaway train and will eventually end up in a smoldering, cartoonish, wreck. But for now, this fucker is reliving the glory days of 1999, going apeshit on anyone in its way. If you missed out on the dot com bubble, have a look at that chart to understand what 500 other stocks were doing at that time, almost on a daily basis between 1998-2000.

Quick screen worth your perusal: stocks with small floats on the move higher, in an effort to catch a BVSN type of move (which is fucking impossible).

Nevertheless, notable stocks include

BONT, TEA, JVA, PATK, CPWM, LNET, WRLD, BODY, SIFY, TZOO, PKT, SUSS, NTSP, ROYL, GNOM, HGG, STRA, STMP and IPSU.

You relics have filthy minds. I was referring to my position in DMND.

Have a look.

There is no news, as far as I can see. However, the stock is absurdly cheap, regardless of whether the company runs a walnut mafia or not. With 50% of the shares sold short, DMND has room to run, in my opinion. As far as I know, there aren’t any pecan/cashew derivative spread trades gone awry.

In addition to DMND, two other of my positions popped off the lows today: FSLR and SFLY. If you take a look at the stocks I own, there is a common denominator. I am long stocks that are heavily shorted because we cannot stop going higher. The bears are on the ropes (see SHLD) and they do not want to get caught in a BVSN type of squeeze. As a bear, you need to limit your downside by covering into irrational rallies. If you try to fight the trend you will end up bankrupt before you can profit from a sell off. If I was short stocks here, thank heavens I am not, I would hedge those shorts with lots of directional long trades. There is nothing that is telling me to sell now, aside from the fact that we are overbought.

Theoretically, we should trade lower because of the overbought condition. However, we are beyond overheated, if I might say so. We are in full retard momentum mode, slicing off heads like apples, stuffing bears into meat grinders–like live chickens into Mcnugget machines.

I hereby offer you the ever ominous BLACK FLAG, sir.

So MCD handedly beat eps estimates this morning. Seriously, I don’t know who is buying their shit. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn MCD is storing billions of Big Macs in some nefarious warehouses in Chinatown. And don’t give me the line that it’s cheaper to eat at MCD than to make food at home. Do you know how they make their chicken Mcnuggets? Whole chickens get transformed into paste. It’s a science fiction nightmare and their food is killing people, literally.

So what do I eat, you query?

Well, let’s go through a typical day.

I wake up and drink a little Earl Grey tea, with honey and 2% milk. Yes, of course, the milk is organic and without anti-biotics. My typical breakfast is either egg whites with toast or simply a crumpet with a little olive oil and pepper. I never use butter.

During lunch I like to eat sandwiches, usually turkey (fresh) or some hummus and grilled chicken on a pita, lettuce tomato and gold. That’s right, I fucking eat gold.

For dinner, I eat whole wheat pasta or some variety of chicken, never fried in grease, typically grilled or roasted. I eat red meat about once per month and maintain my protein via beans, fish, chicken and supplements. I do not add sugar to anything and avoid it best I can; but I’m not fanatical about it. Simply put, I prefer the taste of water over any beverage and find myself drinking it all day long, as a result.

There is never a reason to eat like a filthy animal, no matter how poor you are. If you give a fuck about what you put into your body, you can easily eat healthy– inexpensively.

As for stocks, I expect a minor sell off, only to be backstopped by that deranged fucker, Ben Bernanke. As bad as this tape looks pre-market, you just know it’s gonna bounce hard–graping the bears into late day submission.

I ex’d out stocks with market caps less than $1 billion to avoid talking about BVSN. Thus far, the winners of 2012 were the losers of 2011. Like magic, the calendar year has brought great fortune to commodities, banks and fucking chinese burritos. The more I look at this list, the more I hate the market.

Maybe these stocks will fall into the background, allowing true leadership to step forward. Nonetheless, as of now, this is what we have.

Today was not my day. Most of my stocks went lower and I was paralyzed from pulling the trigger on potential new positions. Today’s big standouts were natural gas stocks, thanks to the cessation of blood letting from the sector. Natty bounces one day and all of the midgets cannon-fire themselves into these stocks: unfuckingbelievable.

The biggest hybrid moves in The PPT were GDP, SWN, HNR, RRC, FST, KWK, XCO, UPL etc.

Gold, silver and copper did well too, even coal. As a matter of fact, just about everything did well except my fucking stocks. Perhaps there’s a black cloud hovering over me, death himself at my doorstep. I’ve been known to push the envelope and make fun of the Gods. It wouldn’t surprise me in the least if some sort of reprisal was in store. However, “The Fly” doesn’t need the help of the Gods, nor does he fear grave karmic reversals, for he is immortal and his financial position is failsafe.

For the day, I shed 1.2% and black clouds strewed trash all over my top hat.

Okay, it’s time to start losing money again. I expect to lose a few mill over the next few days. My head is so hard it could break diamonds out of mountains. Nothing will shake me out of my positions, with exception to the winds of time. I am getting the shit kicked out of me in DECK today and yet I have no reservations about holding it through earnings, dearly scheduled in February. As a matter of fact, all of my stocks are lower today, effectively SHAVING 1.25% from my moneyline.

I’ll buy a million shares of WNR if it ever gets down to $12 again. Without press or Cramer triple buy awards, the refinery sector is on fire again, ripping off Joe the Loser at the pump with the harshest intentions possible. These refiners are making so much money off the despair of others, it’s hilarious.

I hope you pikers are working hard, trying to advance your shitty careers. America needs more vinegar, less honey.

As I write this, Mrs. Fly is literally stroking out over the Drake song posted in the previous thread. She’s threatening me with such a fury that I had no choice but to laugh loudly and blast the song with the greatest belligerency she’s ever seen. I went African Mask on her.

Back to work for me.

Back in the old dot com days I used to trade in and out of a bullshit company named Broadvision. The bubble burst and the share price “corrected” (think The Shining), sending BVSN into a permanent state of irrelevancy–until now.

By the magic of criminal stock manipulation, the share price of BVSN has tripled in recent weeks on zero news. Well, there was news, but it had nothing to do with the company. TIM posted a shockingly competent post regarding the foolishness that is BVSN and I cringe at having to link to his blog; but it’s worth a read.

Moving on.

When the market goes up the way it has in recent weeks, everyone wants to get in. Generally speaking, people chase momentum and sell into fear. More often than not, especially in recent years, this has been the inverse of what you should be doing. I am just as guilty as many of you. When the new year began I was 50% cash and now I have 15%. I’ve taken it upon myself to position into heavily shorted stocks with the belief that short sellers will capitulate, cover, and die in agony, whilst I flick my cigar ashes at their carcasses.

The truth of the matter is, the market is in danger of hurting me again. We’ve had a big run and I am positioned too aggressively. I am up around 7.5% for the year and within 4% of my all-time highs.

On the other hand, perhaps the market is due to break out to the upside. After all, the economy seems to be improving and housing might be firming up. Should Europe rescue itself through sheer lunacy, this market might go parabolic, BVSN, to the upside, grape-raping bears until their fucking faces fall off.

All of my accounts are near all-time highs. People are happy, fat, suckling off of whores, bored of decadence. Men I know buy cars for the price of middle income homes, not to brag, but because they can. I like to think of myself as an investor in time, betting on the prospects of others, for better or for worse. I am a frugal man, who only spends money when it’s required; and I never let the caprices of my business create erroneous spending habits. There are times, granted, when my superfluities lead me to spend a good $5,000 on weekend fun; but it’s all in good taste and that amount of money is nothing but a pittance. I have modest desires with regards to orbital space cannons and the establishment of fortress cities in offshoot corners of the world.

I also realize there is a great dichotomy between people like myself and others, struggling to make ends meet. I don’t feel sorrow for anyone because every man has to make his mark. If I was out on hard times, I would expect the same indifference from all of you. There is no need to nurse a broken spirit; it needs to be repaired through the fire of hardship. I won’t delve into platitudes regarding what this country was built upon. It’s too cliche at 1am in the morning on a Friday night. But if you are enduring hard times, just know that others, including myself, have been there and have not only survived, but flourished. There is never a reason to feel dejected or morose, unless of course you have psychic abilities and already know how your story ends.

The best thing that ever happened to me, aside from the birth of my three children and being born, was getting fired, by some fat shlub, early in my career. It took a little bit of time and dedication to exact my revenge; but I accomplished it severely– and he felt the heat from the fire of my soul when it happened. Some people break under pressure and get swept under the rug, others build skyscrapers with the shattered pieces.

Fuck it. I just loaded up on MWW. My foot is now firmly pressed down on the gas, heading for a crevasse, because I have a nitrous oxide engine and I can make it to the other side.

Don’t look now but GSVC is likely to spiral higher and soon. Remember, Facebook is going to file iPO and when they do, people will race to own GSVC, as they own FBOOK is the private markets. Before GRPN and ZNGA ipo’d, GSVC ran 25%+ each time, then collapsed after the emotional roller coaster climaxed. I expect the stock to trade north of $18 the day before the FBOOK ipo. The play is to accumulate from now until then and liquidate one day prior to ipo.

Look, I am made from win. Even when “The Fly” loses, he’s winning. Shit is out of control at Le Casa del Fly. The money keeps rolling in and it’s never gonna end. On a separate note, the boys over at 12631 are hitting homeruns, at a ridiculous clip. Go check them out.

The very essence of how I am positioned now is to profit from the pain felt by unworthy short sellers. I’ve taken it upon myself to be long stocks with bountiful short positions. Bet against me…lose your house.