18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
You might not see it now, but a great conflagration with Russia looms. To some, a war with Russia is desirable — mostly because THEY won’t be the one’s doing the dying. Even if all of the absurd rumors were true about how Russia keeps bumbling over themselves in The Ukraine, they’re still killing 1,000 Ukrainians PER DAY. How involved do you want to get in a situation like that?
Russian submarines sashaying near your faggot beaches, deploying leg cutting drones off your coast to get rid of American swimoooors?
Or how about they just cut the transatlantic fiber cables, ruining your Netflix and Chill schemes?
Or how about they torpedo all of those super cute LNG tankers floating across to Europe, turning them into little Chinese floating lanterns?
Or maybe they’ll nuke your home town because its home to an Lockheed factory and they figured, as all Russian villains do, that to nuke it makes more sense than not to nuke it.
Thank God nukes aren’t real.
Either way, we have the retarded Poles itching to fight and all of the Baltic retards with 1000 toy army soldiers hankering, mind you, for war with Russia — mostly because they’re MUHHHHHH NATO and American lives are cheap and used to spread its degenerate brand of GLOBOHOMO far and wide.
It seems, and this could be me black pilling again, there is no way out of this — when you have literal morons in charge of these affairs in DC and Kiev, clamoring for more violence and more ritualistic humiliation. If I had to bet, I’d bet on a hot war with Russia by summer, only because NATO cannot afford to lose in Ukraine and the cohesion of NATO is far more important to America than peace in Europe.
How does one play this?
Longer term: defense contractors, risk averse stocks, and selling short. My core thesis for 2023 is substantially lower prices. Although we dropped 25% in 2022, it was far too little all things considered. Prepare for many legs lower and prepare for the great apocalypse — for it is knocking at your door.
They don’t have any debt, but Tesla is behaving like they’re on the verge of bankruptcy. I can only assume the real reason why TSLA is down 40% over the past two weeks is because Elon Musk is releasing the Twitter files, essentially becoming a whistle blower against government corruption in their attempts to suppress speech. I know I know, you left wingers don’t like free speech and it goes against you’re fucking programming — but that’s exactly what is taking place — unvarnished and without filter.
Perhaps this all pertains to Elon’s leverage to buy the shitbag Twitter and that’s the reason TSLA is circling to zero. Or, perhaps their government subsidies will be stripped away from them, Elon arrested and imprisoned for treason. Either way, THEY are certainly out to get him.
It’s a very brave thing to see Elon buck against the orthodoxy, shoving their left wing dogma where the sun doesn’t shine. But I’ve seen this before, well not exactly this. But I’ve seen other “trailblazers” and it always ends the same: THEY WIN: we do not. Things go back to the way they were, wars happen, Americans stripped of more freedoms, everyone is trans.
As for markets: both cataclysm and doom are striking at once to cap off a year where fuckery reigned supreme.
The way my new trading goes, I’m 100% cash now and will allocate after 12pm. I’m down 64bps with a 10% TZA position in place. I walked into today 20% SQQQ and then traded out of it and also a quick SOXS trade. I was thinking we’d rally today, but this is what we got.
Over at Stocklabs, I have lots of pro tools in the wings and plans to generally upgrade the system to enable users to play with themselves with unending joy and happiness. Truth be told, the greatest upgrade to Stocklabs, however, will always be me. Over the past year, I’ve managed returns of +62%, mostly through betting against markets. The difficulty some members had following me was due to my former frantic pace of trading, which has been GREATLY cleaved, as I now wholly depend on weekly quant picks from Stocklabs, supplemented with my timely hedges or leveraged longs. I have not felt this confident in a stratagem in quite some time and can tell you now, without equivocation, 2023 is going to be a grande year of Señor Tropicana. BRACE YOURSELVES for extreme winship and gains of a ribald nature.
Since it’s the holidays and we like to keep it fucking light here at iBankcoin — I’ll update you on my recent obsessions. For those who follow me a long time, you may or may not be aware of the fact that I tend to hyper fixate on things and really learn the subject until I get “bored” or move onto the next thing. Presently, I am fixated on Pinot Noir wines, shetland wool sweaters, and amusingly Hemingway again. I’ve also been reading Dorothy Parker and have Sherwood Anderson on deck.
I’ve come to realize, as I age, I am different from others and my fixations are not shared by others. I have an extensive book collection and have been building a formidable wine collection as well. For Xmas, I received a humidor. I am not a big cigar smoker, but do enjoy pipe tobacco on occasion. I have come to learn, through the humidor community, improper humidity levels can in fact produce TOBACCO BEETLES, which is hilarious and also horrifying. I expect to be wholly consumed and obsessed with cigars by spring.
Markets should perform well for the balance of 2022, at least I’d like to thing so after 3 glasses of Santa Barbara Pinot.
I had believed in Santa Claus dropping into my Brooklyn apartment until the 4th grade, awfully late for kids back then. I remember when I found out he wasn’t real — from my Spanish teacher in class who glibly stated “we all know boys and girls — Santa Claus isn’t real.” Half of the kids laughed, but the other half, like me, were confused. When I told my mother about it, as usual, she stormed down to the school, which was a block away from my house, and offered my Spanish teacher some words of advice.
As an adult, it’s easy to disconnect oneself from magical things and ideas. Some parents never lie to their kids about Santa Claus in order to ground them and I am sure there is something to that, long term. However, I can tell you from experience and from the testaments of my children, who all believed in Santa Claus until middle school, that having that moment in time where things appear to be magical and special — believing in Santa Claus is just about the best thing a child could experience growing up.
One of the ways my mother got me to really believe was recounted by a story told by my grandfather. Sometime back in the 1950s, in the middle of the night, my grandfather woke up my mother and said “quick come to the window — Santa Claus just left.” My mother dashed to the window and rubbed the sand out of her eyes and eagerly gazed up into the snowy skies and swore she saw Santa on his sled. She told me this story and I told the same story to my kids and I am sure they’ll tell their kids.
Each night before Christmas my wife and I would leave presents near the tree from Santa. Learning from the penmanship mistakes of my mother (I always was curious why Santa had the same penmanship as my mother), we’d leave presents without labels knowing it was exactly what each child wanted. They instantly knew which present was theirs and receiving that gift from Santa only elevated the gratitude they exhibited. After receiving their presents, they’d run to see what happened to the carrots and cookies and milk they left for Santa and his reindeers and would laugh when all of the milk and cookies were gone, leaving just crumbs on the plate, and half the carrot was gnawed into (I was the designated carrot and cookie and milk consumer).
We’d get the present ideas to give to them from Santa by taking them to the mall to see one of Santa’s helpers. Whatever they asked Mall Santa for we bought it for them. When I was young growing up with my sister, my mother would do the same thing: take us to the mall and have us ask Santa for stuff. The only difference between my Santa and my kids’ Santa was my Santa didn’t get me what I wanted, but what my single mother could afford. My wife spoiled our kids rotten — but I am sure they don’t see it that way since being spoiled is on a spectrum these days.
Santa usually got me some generic stuffed animal and maybe some second rate toy. I do recall being disappointed in the quality of Santa’s toys, but also recall thinking “perhaps that’s how things are made up in the North Pole.”
Christmas Eve was always celebrated at my grandparents house. My grandfather would decorate his two bedroom apartment the very best he could, with paper decals covering the walls, in all rooms. He’d frame all of the windows of his 6th story apartment with those big colorful bulbs from the 80s and make a seafood feast, consisting of mussels, crabs, lobster, and shrimp. He’d also make anti-pasta for me and my sister and lots of pasta fra diavolo. I wasn’t fond of seafood back then and ate sparingly. I’d make struffolis with him with the pizza dough we’d buy the day before from the local pizzeria, which were these little dough balls draped in honey and sprinkles, infused with anisette. They were my favorite. On Christmas Day, which was also my grandmother’s birthday, we’d have a large feast served before 3pm (Italian dinner time) consisting of manicotti, sometimes lasagna, with a red sauce filled with sausages and beef neckbones. My grandfather would wake up at 5am, drink his Sanka coffee with toast and butter, sometimes and grapefruit, and begin cooking his sauce at 6am.
Those were the very best of times.
Merry Christmas and thank you for indulging me by reading my memories.
Another joyous session for House Fly, higher by 90bps or so.
The new stratagem I have exacted has alleviated the previous pressures of having to choose stocks. I do not need to choose stocks anymore, since the Stocklabs quant does it for me. Now I sit there and draw lines on charts and tactically weigh in and out of ETFs in size for 1% rips all day. With gains nearing 11% for December and markets DOWN 9%, Le Fly has once again proven his bear market mettle and renews his claim that he cannot be fucked with.
May you have a blessed Christmas and enjoy the merriment of loved ones and family members whom you normally hate but tolerate this time of year. Make good memories and try extra hard to be nice.
The west has moved so far radically to the left in recent decades, even the idea of gender is controversial. I’d like to exhibit two ads for this Xmas season of spend.
On one hand is this commercial whereby Grandpa practices putting on make up in order to introduce it to what he views as his gay grandson, more or less cajoling him into becoming trans. Head of marketing at Diageo Ursula Meija-Melgar praised the commercial, calling it “one of the most beautiful projects of my career.”
On the other is Santa Putin sneaking into an LGBTQ home on Xmas eve and turning kids straight, removing LGBTQ material and what looks like actual people too.
It’s obvious to anyone paying attention, there are two distinct lifestyle choices being made here by entire civilizations. Without delving too deep into the philosophical differences between east v west — it is a fact that trans people suffer from horrendous bouts of depression and have very high suicide rates. Some will argue this is because they are cast out, feeling different and because of that want to blow their brains out. I am sure there is a little something to that too and I emphasize with anyone who is feeeeeeeeling depressed and not enjoying life to his/her fullest. From purely an anecdotal view point, growing up in the 80s — people were happier. Mass shootings rarely occurred and social discord was significantly lower. This isn’t golden aged thinking either, but statistical facts.
I hold no sway over any of this and cannot offer an elixir to the pangs being inflicted on the west. I feel a deep sense of dread when having to think about raising a young child in this environment where up is down and down does’t exist anymore. But one thing seems clear: these grievances are presently being aired out on the battle field in Ukraine. I know many of my American friends do not believe America/NATO will enter the war. However, if Russia wins this war — it will be over for NATO and represent the biggest humiliation for America in her entire history. So much is at stake and god forbid we enter back into the dark ages when boys didn’t become transvestites at the behest of grandpa.
BEHOLD! The truth comes your way via a bloggery created back in 2007 when people read instead of tweeted and the blogosphere was all the rage.
Let it be known here that I was down 2.8% at the lows — due to covering my shorts in the morning and taking the morning off. It was definitely like shooting fish in a barrel and I am certain I missed out on many great trades. But when I returned, I traded like a space alien magian (SAM), as it customary for men of my status and stature.
The BIG BUZZ out of DC and FBI Twitter today is the Zelensky speech in front of congress yesterday. It seems, apparently so, if you do not support war against Russia and Ukrainian slavic tribalism versus Moscow — you are in fact a TRAITOR to America.
FBI agent, DC office
Truth is, fuck Ukraine — but not for the reasons you think. When I say “fuck Ukraine” it has little to do with Ukrainians but instead the GLOBOHOMO schemes of my country. Ukrainians have no idea whom they are allying with and it’ll end the same, just like in Afghanistan. All of those wonderful GENDER STUDY programs at Kabul University have been closed. So very sad. The war against Russia, a land power, cannot end in victory for Ukraine — an inferior land power without independent means for arms production. Even if NATO went ALL IN against Russia, we still could not win in Ukraine. Ergo, and this goes without saying, we are boring witness to ONCE AGAIN ruinous NEOCON schemes that will fail — because they are incompetent and cannot govern. Let me clarify.
Over the past 4 decades the neocons have grabbed control of the west, especially America. Their wealth and power got them there — but their incompetence and spiteful hubris will be their downfall — because they do not govern with grace. They govern out of malice and without meaning. Their end goal is money and oppression and based upon the unwritten laws of man — this is a failing stratagem.
I closed the session down just 43bps, hugging RECORD HIGHS because I in fact trade with grace and meaning, a purpose rooted in greatness and fellowship.
Do not look at today’s market rout with forlorn eyes. Just as Americans hate America because of its government — you too should hate the Federal Reserve for what they’re doing to your stocked market. We can’t seem to hike rates fast enough, after ZIRP for a decade amidst the caitiffs running about in their under-garments perverting western finance with cheap money and schemes. Those schemes have now come due and there is no one else to hold their bags. Inflation is on fire and the war in the Ukraine has truly caught them all in one room naked with cocaine all over their faces.
Christmas has been canceled and has been canceled for some time now, as America deluges into depravity and rot amidst its puppeteers psyoping them to death to the point they don’t even know if they’re girls and boys anymore. This sort of sordid recklessness cannot and will not survive the fires and when the fires are burning, do not look at them and hope for a fireman in fashionable red attire and an ascot twisted around his neck to shoot water from his Gucci hose — but instead watch it and find solace in watching it burn — for the great reset we all need this holiday season is renewal by destruction — out with the status quo and in with traditional norms.
This is not the time of year to be forlorn and ruin an otherwise fantastic year which saw stocks down in the order of 25%. After all, the pagan holidays loom and I’m pretty sure you all have all purchased thousands of dollars worth of stuff and have wrapped them in fancy festive foil in order to open them up like a retarded child on Xmas morning and to feign surprise.
Oh, I know what you’re thinking:
“What an evil bastard this Fly guy is. Who the hell does he think he is anyway?”
I won’t bother to convince you of my many virtues but instead challenge you to stop me winning streak. Look at me, crazy as fuck just rampaging throughout the marketplace, whilst you struggle like the fucking moron you apparently are — festooned with Ukrainian flair and CIA/FBI merchandise in your closet — because American democracy is the best…bro.
It feels good to preside over the end of this nonsense. We can only hope for the turn to happen quick and with maximum levels of pain.
I write to you now with immense pleasure, having now seen once again my crystal ball has crested my accounts and swelled my purse (PAUSE) to new recourd highs. It would please you to know that I am now up 10.2% for December, up nearly 63% for 2022. All of my trades, every single one of them, posted in real time inside the hallowed confined of Stocklabs. Once upon a time I gave my picks away here for free; but have since grown to understand that giving them to you here, on the free site, is like throwing them away.
They’re for closers only.
The secret to my success is simple: I draw lines on paper and the charts simply do exactly what I tell them to do. I position ahead of time and makes the money.
A stupid man will show you the chart above and highlight the fact that I started that account in 2020 at $100k and say some shit like “if I can do it, so can you.” But the fact of the matter is, I am inexorably better than you, as an investooor, in virtually all aspects of this game. I have natural talents that lend to my success and I have been trading more or less since I was 10. Whilst the lot of you were at home playing video games like nerds, I was teaching myself about stocks. That’s who you are and this is who I am, pal.
