iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
18,692 Blog Posts

ALL I HAVE IS MY $IQ; EVERYTHING ELSE IS LOSS

I report to you as a melancholy man. Markets are betwixt with fear and greed, unsure of its own gender. I tried to tell the market, “Mark you are a man. Get up and dance” and it simply nodded at me and then pretended to put on some lipstick and eye shadow. The subsequent result of this confusion has led my portfolio astray, with only my IQ and a little bit of this PVTL to keep me afloat. Earlier this morning, I sold all of my oils for losses and now I am hamstrung by a slew of stocks saddled by intra-day losses.

The tech sector, as a whole, has market breadth of only 30%. I know — this is the very worst market in the history of the world. Next thing you know, Russian paratroopers will land in DC and occupy the White House.

Even my earlier purchases of AMD and SHSP have gone nowhere. The Lord works in mysterious ways and now it is testing me with capital losses, Frankly, I don’t know what to do with myself. Am I to remain in cash, about 20% now, or buy MOAR? Should I short sell stocks, go on vacation, and never look at my screen again?

The only sectors moving higher today are the banks — a bedraggled sector bereft of dignity and excitement. I’d rather kill myself than be forced to trade in and out of banks. I cannot think of a more horrible existence than that.

At any rate, I hope the close of trade brings forth new gifts of profit, although I am reticent to believe such a thing is possible. The summer doldrums have infiltrated every orifice of the human mind — fixated on perversions and drugs, addled by summer sangria and spritzers. Nobody loves stocks anymore. Sad!

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3 comments

  1. it is showtime

    FLAT. FUCKING. Y-CURVE.

    C’mon Baby

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  2. juice

    It could be worse — at least you still have your $IQ

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  3. acehood

    2x your IQ position and have some gin n juice, pal.

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