iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
18,088 Blog Posts

Trading in a Disjointed Country is Fun — I am Invincible!

It has become quite apparent to me that many Americans aren’t well suited for emotionally charged environments, always opting for impulsive acts of depravity, violence, and tone deaf adherence to a set of standards that only serve the interests of political pigs. I can only speak for Americans — because it’s where I live. I know the people and their strengths, weaknesses; and knowing this has enabled me to crush them on a daily basis for the better part of my entire life.

While markets edge higher and stocks provide investors with once in a life time opportunities, many of you are sidelined — still waiting for a crash, convinced that all of the chickens will be coming home to roost. Trump is on his way to prison, as well as his entire cabinet. His family will be forced to break rocks in hard labor camps, and Putin will soon be assassinated by American patriots at the CIA, leading to a sequence of events that will enable us to take Crimea, re-institute unfair trade practices that give Mexico, China, and Europe an advantage of us — and bomb N. Korea until everyone there is dead.

After all of this shit happens, your market will finally collapse, due to the panic, but also due to the normalization of much higher corporate tax rates and regulations that will go back into effect once Trump is arrested. Sure, stocks will trade lower — but fuck Wall Street. We don’t need them, just their money to finance social projects and charitable causes.

Some of you are unappreciative of my glib sarcasm, but don’t worry, rest assured, I don’t give a fuck. Let me rephrase that so we’re clear: I care a great deal about you, the unwashed pleb reader, and I also care about the state of the retail investor, maybe even an advisor or two. Those guys are my char-wallahs. What I don’t care about are the outcomes of this sordid game being played in our political landscape. I am completely disconnected from it. I don’t even read the news anymore — because it’s meaningless and does not put coin in my pocket.

All that is important now is the bottom line and how can I navigate the current trend to improve my life and the lives of the people who depend upon me.

I promise you, if you simply lived by this mantra, you’ll not only be a happier person, but richer too.

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11 comments

  1. moosh

    Yup, pretty much summed it up. LeFly for prez 2040. After three terms each of Orange and Ivanka, the good Doctor, basically ruling the galaxy of finance – should battle it out against Barron.

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  2. ferd

    “I don’t even read the news anymore — because it’s meaningless and does not put coin in my pocket.”

    All good …until they draft your sons to fight the Iran war they are engineering.

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    • Dr. Fly

      That’s exactly the type of paranoid hysteria I avoid. You make a perfect example of what not to worry about.

      Concern yourselves with things you can control.

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      • ferd

        Paranoid?

        Our manipulators have had us withdraw from an international agreement that the US had negotiated and had pushed our allies and the row to accept. This has left Iran in a position where, to abide by the terms of the agreement is politically untenable, and to not abide by the agreement will invite Trump’s handlers to demand war.

        I know that you have surrendered your gnads and are determined to kiss the ring in order to bank coin while the sun shines, but I choose to not just accept evil …even if my efforts prove futile.

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        • acehood

          So stop bitching (that includes posting here, btw) and do something about it.

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          • ferd

            Look how pathetic this blog has gotten. Fly jokes “I don’t read the news”, and morons like you come out of the woodwork to cheer the idea on.

            Anyway, bitching about our perpetual state of war is the very least that a citizen can do …and it most certainly beats being some Fly groupie with a rapper pic attacking those who protest as traitors expediting the end of the US’s dominance.

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          • acehood

            You’re all talk. Do something.

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  3. MSGT HARTMAN

    Google “end of the draft”.

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  4. moosh

    $BIIB set the whole down move in biotech, if I remember correctly. We should be buying the fuck out of bio now right???? I am. What is the next $FGEN?

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  5. 'merica

    I hosted my parents and sibling for dinner the other night. I boasted about my three year old who had been reciting spanish and russian alphabets that he apparently found on youtube.

    Their response – RUSSIAN, really, Russian!? Hope he doesn’t end up like manafort (I don’t even know what that means). The brainwashing is real. I kept things civil and diverted the conversation to real life things, not some assclowns that none of us have or will ever meet or influence.

    Having kid number three tomorrow, nothing else in the World matters.

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