iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,431 Blog Posts

Nasdaq Futures Have Skyrocketed Thanks to Better Than Expected Tech Earnings

I just got done driving the family around for a solid 3 hours. The majority of my time is spent doing things like that — to and fro in an unproductive whir of patriarchic duties. My advice to young men out there, attempting to make their mark — wait a long time to start a family. After you’ve found the right woman to settle down with, map out the live of your children in advance.

After the market closed today, the advice given in my previous post was summarily flushed down the sewer pipe. AMZN, INTC, and MSFT crushed earnings and now Nasdaq futures are +100. I’m going to get fucked in this SOXS tomorrow. My only saving grace will be this burgeoning rally in cryptos — which should buoy shares of OSTK over $40.

Summer is coming. The better among us will soon depart to their gentile destinations, leaving incompetents to man the trading turrets. We should anticipate a feverish run in cryptos and something akin to a drift higher in equities. Providing people can keep from slitting their wrists over the meaningless driving higher in rates, all should be okay.

My intent is to play trends and invest the majority of my money systematically. Right now, the trends are scatter brained — helter skelter, aimless nothingness. Regardless of whether the indices are jumping higher, there really hasn’t been large marge money in this tape.

Alas, time to go now — as I have 5 rib eyes to cook and a bottle of red to uncork.

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21 comments

  1. heckler

    I was gonna say, leave some powder in the crypto cannon before your vacay

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  2. joyous__ending

    Am I on earth two? Something weird going on, futures are down.

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  3. ferd

    re prior thread …Banning Sarc was an easy business decision business decision on Fly’s part.

    While Sarc was one of the few around here with anything even remotely resembling balls when it came to the most sacred of sacred cows, it was very unfortunate that the important truths that he dared utter were associated with both his crazy theories and his hatefulness.

    Anyhow, let’s be cool with advocates for war with Iran, war with Syria, war with Russia, cool with the shooting of 1500 unarmed protesters …and let’s tolerate the racism, homophobia, anti-Arabism, anti-millennialism on this blog, but let’s be grateful that Fly has saved us from Sarc’s antisemitism.

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    • chuck bennett

      #freesarc

      Regards

      Chuck Bennett

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      • ferd

        Nope. Not gonna happen. Fly has taken a firm stand against one, and only one, form of bigotry. He has evolved greatly over the past 15 years, but like most, he is still a beta boy.

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        • Dr. Fly

          My agenda is not yours Ferd.

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        • chuck bennett

          Nah,

          Sarc was just generalizing about too many people. He made it personal.

          Black Israelites being mean to old Jewish grandfathers or small children is not cool either.

          Not all white people are devils. One can not going around saying that to all white people.

          Because we are not all devils. 😉

          Regards

          Chuck Bennett

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          • TJWP

            Sarc generalized to be sensational and to troll. Somewhat unfortunate as his points were often lost in the vitriol.

            Maybe he genuinely hates Jews… but so the fuck what? Plenty of people hate plenty of people and most of us can make up our own minds.

            You’d be surprised how much your average settlement inhabiting Jew has in common (from an ideological perspective) with a Conservative with a libertarian bent.

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        • lesurgeon

          STFU YOU DICK SUCKING, clown.

          I don’t care either way but take the Cock out yo moff.

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    • acehood

      What truths?

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    • acehood

      You should be banned for actually typing “anti-millennialism”. The fuck out of here.

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    • lesurgeon

      @ ferd

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    • TJWP

      #FreeSarc

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  4. Lyndon Keltner

    Copper 3.092. In as fuck.

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  5. masteroneass

    Honestly I still do not believe the rally in the nasdaq. Its way overpriced. Who is actually buying now and how did wintel beat “estimates”?

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    • Lyndon Keltner

      SOX was way oversold and needed an excuse to bounce, if you want it to be cynically succinct.

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