iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,431 Blog Posts

Retail Stocks Are Now Hitting End of World Dystopian Oversold Levels

Are you man enough to buy them here? Just think about all of the people being flushed out today, after their beloved TJX got blown the fuck out on worse than expected results. Envision the margin calls, weddings being canceled, families torn apart, lived shattered. Now think about how you might profit from that situation. Sounds enticing, doesn’t it?

The Exodus predictive mean reversion oscillator is suggesting Apparel is oversold now. Have a look.

Full disclosure: I have zero interest in playing in the sandbox with shitty companies. There are too many ways to lose. However, knowing the degenerate class of my readers, both liberal and conservative in their retardation, I figured you’d like to gamble on the ponies just one more time until barreling towards alcoholism and eventual death.

Names of possible interest and % of shares sold short.

JWN 25%
ANF 28%
PLCE 24%
URBN 21%
FINL 18%
AEO 17%

The mall is dead, indeed. But before the padlock closes it forever, perhaps the defibrillators will be put to use, providing mallfags with a little hope to carry them into the future.

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15 comments

  1. jacked rabbit

    I’m buying alcoholism in Johnnie Walker terms.

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  2. dragun

    That pic caught me off guard. Thought someone hijacked Fly’s site!

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  3. mx2101

    What an absurd picture. I’m seeing it during lunch, felt ill, slack jawed, peas and corn dribbling. Some things are better left in the ’80s or whenever it was taken.

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  4. nemesis

    Fly,

    Riddle me this.

    Malls are empty, but every time my chick drags me to an outlet center (camarillo ca) the place is jammed black friday style.

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    • mensch

      Is anyone buying anything? That’s what I notice. No one’s carrying bags.

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  5. NotGekko

    Gayest. Pic. Ever.

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    • derp

      I have no doubt he can find something even gayer. He likes the picture of Boggs in the shower from Shawshank Redemption

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  6. matt_bear

    the mall might be dead, but retail is evolving. i’ve witnessed a local mall come back from near death by adding a couple trendy restaurants and a large Regal movie theater. brought the foot traffic back.

    these “escape rooms” are also starting to show up too.

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  7. bountyhunter1

    JWN numbers weren’t that bad if I had to pick one that might be the the one

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  8. bushwacker2

    The mall is dead. It’s just a place to hang out, people watch; a place where older people get their “steps” in as they play with their FitBit. Very little is purchased from the stores (which now function as catalog showrooms for the stuff people buy on Amazon). Occasionally an ice cream cone is sold (extra Trump).

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  9. Dr. Fly

    HOMOPHOBES, gender is on a spectrum!

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  10. thinair

    They are doing so because they are doomed and business is sliding, with bad future prospects. Its not a random occurrence. Feel free to reshort UTLA here

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