iBankCoin

WORLD AT WAR: Chocolate Cake Armada Edition

I’ve been in business meetings this afternoon and have reviewed all of your comments, as well as listening to talking heads on the radio regarding world events. I’ve concluded that most of you do not deserve to live. Let’s give the gorillas a chance to run things.

I believe a chocolate caked world war, strewn with nuclear fallout that will exterminate the virus called humanity is the end all elixir for a species out of control. You rarely say anything interesting, or insightful. Most of it is partisan hackery — Hillbots talking with their faces filled with Mcmuffins about how they told you so and how the bitch would’ve been better. I think it’s clear to anyone with a brain here that foreign policy is taking the path of least resistance, as evidenced by the avarice amongst our leaders who’ve been banging on the war drums.

Don’t you see that?

Markets are pricing in fear, which is why Trump infrastructure stocks are getting murdered — led by copper down the drain. I suppose nuclear war in N Korea is a negative for growth in China.

Utilities are up — defense stocks are flat. You know the drill.

My neocon portfolio is swimming lower. It’s always darkest before the dawn for neocons. For example, after Trump got elected, neocons around the country were panicked with fear that peace might break out. Alas, Trump’s body was then inhabited by an alien being and now he’s doing the exact opposite of everything he said before the elections — becoming a wet dream for neocons.

Be patient. The war profits will soon be casting down upon us, as we nation build the world and export our brand of free market capitalism to all people who crave joyous democracy.

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22 comments

  1. natehois

    My issue here is that he can change his mind tomorrow or get bitch slapped by congress, throwing these stocks down a well like little Timmy.

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  2. cancel19

    Amazing how quickly certainty changes to uncertainty.

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  3. john_galt

    Cake is the new popped-corn for watching live the world going through a shitstorm

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  4. metalleg

    Chocolate Cake => Great Name For Rapper

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  5. jersey whale

    Hey Fly, did you like the ending of Black Sails?

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    • frog

      One of your fave conspiracy theorists there, Roberts, finding False Flag attacks at Sandy Hook and everywhere else.

      You folks seem to like conspiracy theories and False Flags better than sex and chocolate cake.

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      • juice

        I don’t agree with him in certain instances but he’s on the money here.

        But you ignore it, and go back to your virtual reality echo chamber CIA/State Dept.-approved fake news.

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        • sarcrilege

          What the zionist dipshits dont understand is that the Ruskies couldn’t put it more clearly for that shitty terrorist state Israel: “Provoke a war, and we will destroy you on your own territory.”
          This time Israel will be turned into a glass lake from orbit w/o warning. And then peace will embrace our World.

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    • sarcrilege

      PCR nails it again in this paragraph:
      “Is he going to tell Lavrov that he didn’t really mean all those nasty lies he told about Russia, but the zionist neoconservatives made him do it? That he is not really in charge, just a tool of the Anglo-Zionist Empire?”

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    • john_galt

      I’d rather take weed

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  6. Dr. Fly

    Loved it.

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  7. frog

    “Trump’s body was then inhabited by an alien being and now he’s doing the exact opposite of everything he said — becoming a wet dream for neocons.”

    Trump did not suddenly change. Trump was an insane clown the whole time he was running for pres, and before that too. Lying constantly, totally incoherent and nonsensical. Anyone who looked at Trump and assumed that he was a focused organized person committed to particular actions, and responsive to the public, was mistaken. That person was Hillary.

    Insane Clown President: Dispatches from the 2016 Circus Hardcover – January 17, 2017
    by Matt Taibbi (Author), Victor Juhasz (Illustrator)

    https://www.amazon.com/Insane-Clown-President-Dispatches-Circus/dp/0399592466/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1492020892&sr=8-1&keywords=Insane+Clown+President

    Trump supporters were just worshiping at the shrine of Trump because he is supposedly a billionaire. Americans worship billionaires as gods.

    You folks passed up the chance to vote for competence and sanity. Because Limbaugh, Hannity at Fox, Breitbart, Drudge etc. propagandized you into thinking that Hillary was the Devil, by telling a lie a minute about her. So you just let yourself get dragged further down into the swamp that Trump the liar told you he was going to drain.

    We all make mistakes. Vote for Dems in the 2018 Congressional election, and maybe we can turn ship around, so that it governs for the benefit of the people, not for the benefit of the GOP establishment swamp that has been in control of Congress for years.

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  8. soupbone

    Do not give up hope. There are certain qualities to be found. Trump changes his mind quickly, like Fly. There is no arrogant “I have always said this or that” like Hilly does. Changing a wrong approach in a do or die situation is crucial. Today, unlike yesterday, I feel management is occuring.

    When you move to the country, take care of the jet stream patterns as direct wind from nuclear war is not good. Rules out Maine, and maritime Canada.

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    • ironturd

      So flip flopping, ditching his base, failing on his promises and splooging in an interview over launching missiles is “management”? I wonder what leadership is gonna look like

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  9. ironturd

    Not feelin the conviction in this piece. Two weeks ago we were 160% long wall materials, now it’s Hillbots, lazy lashing out at readership and neocon “darkest before the dawn.” Volatility is dead, long live volatility. Make day-to-day macro themed investment 180s great again.

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  10. 99 lead balloons
    99 lead balloons

    Go go gold! Some huge plays to be found in West Africa.

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  11. heckler

    GOD DAMN FLY THE NEW DESIGN IS SO FUCKING JANKIE BRO!

    I’ve written two multi-paragraph responses on my phone only to get double fucked. Last time it slid over to the blog list on the left and I couldn’t even get it back to press send. Fucking barf. Uhg

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