iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,415 Blog Posts

Claim: iPhone 7 Bursted into Flames and Burned a Man’s Car Down to a Cinder, Investors Yawn

A man in Australia had the audacity to leave his brand new,  Tim ‘Gay’ Cook inspired, iPhone 7 under a pile of clothes in his car while he sauntered the beach in search of waves. Upon returning to his car and new iPhone, his car was in ruins — a smoldering mess of epic proportions.
phonecar
Matt Jones is now without both a phone and a car.

The surf instructor bought the phone just one week ago and says he hasn’t dropped it or used a foreign charger

The tech giant Apple wouldn’t comment but said they were aware of the complaint and they are investigating.

This isn’t the first time people have complained over the iPhone 7 exploding or bursting into flames. The amusing aspect of this story, which has been developing for weeks, is the oblivious nature of Apple investors.  The stock is higher by 3% over the past month, which would make sense if their phone wasn’t bursting into flames and scarring the faces of innocent Chinese consumers.

If it weren’t for the fact that Samsung was recalling their weapons of mass destruction, Apple’s stock would be getting hammered now.

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2 comments

  1. juice

    meanwhile, did wikileaks just say Russia is NOT behind the recent leaks?

    https://twitter.com/wikileaks/status/789173501458456576

    Wikileaks — “Clinton’s “17 US intelligence agencies” may be the biggest, most immediately disprovable wopper ever intentionally made during a debate. “

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  2. zola

    What is funny is that their isn’t a sudden leap in Bond-style gunmetal cigarette cases in which to store Phones of Random Destruction.

    The cheapest alternative that appears in my myopic vision is to use a prophylactic – namely safely stow your smoking ‘Smore in a silicone baking glove. This ought to minimize the collateral damage, at a minimum. At home I use a heavy metal toolbox to encapsulate idle Li-Ion nasties while they sleep at night, no kidding.

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