iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,445 Blog Posts

THE BIGGEST RALLY OF YOUR PATHETIC LIVES IS COMING

You can say you read it here first. When history is written and society tries to sift through the rubble, formerly known as the financial blogosphere, they will find one person to be heads and shoulders above the rest, in terms of being able to read the tea leaves.

LISTEN TO ME you fucking bastards. The Chinese scoundrels will soon be marginalized and the CEO’s of our corporations will use their greedy traits to buy back their own shares and surprise competitors with “fuck you, give me your entire company” merger overtures. I know this because I’ve seen the future.

Lesser men are sitting idle, roasting rats and porcupines over a flame, declaring end of days–eagerly reading Zerohedge for the latest scandal to rock Wall Street.

HERETO: the market is going to bounce, long and wide. Its girth will break the fucking faces of bearshitters from here to Berlin. Brace for it, you fucked faces (double entendre!).

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22 comments

  1. jts5362

    Damn genius

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  2. there will be blood
    there will be blood

    Long and wide on the bounce. That’s what your sister said.

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  3. vandamme

    “Exodus OS bitches!” – Ben B. just now, Citadel cornered office

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  4. gapfiller

    I foresee all of those dumb money poled smokers being required to cover their short positions.

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  5. zuullosespws

    Shark bite insurance. Now that’s a good idea.

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  6. bonobo smores

    I’ve had porcupine roasted over a campfire. Not that great but my dog loved it.

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  7. rormilt

    Epic

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  8. joyous__ending

    Chine President Xi Jinping basically said “I am Ben Chow Bernanke and will pump our market”

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  9. mrcharlie

    Fah Q Fly you fuck faced bastard!!! hahahahhahaahhaa

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  10. rangersfan

    ‘ Rose bud……’
    Citizen Kane, excellent movie.

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  11. in your weeds

    we are 7yrs into a bull market..the pain trade is not higher…down another 5% followed by a complete collapse in daily volatility is the real pain trade from here until Jan 1st..

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  12. ggarbacz

    New short interest data is out tomorrow night after the close. It will be telling as short added HUGE with the last data. Did they add again and set themselves up for a shit storm? We will know tomorrow after the close.

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