iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,417 Blog Posts

Avoid Degeneracy at all Costs

With global markets trending higher and US markets soaring to new highs, up almost a full 3 percentage points for the year; investors will be tempted to delve into a bit of wanton degeneracy. When walking about the drug den, perusing over the crack pipes and heroin needles, one is always tempted to take a flame torch or two to the pipe and take a puff, or perhaps stick a needle in one’s neck to enjoy a good morning opiate. “The Fly” is here to tell you “don’t do it.”

Say no to bad stocks, just like you’d say no to bad drugs.

The process goes likes this.

You’re making some money in good companies; but all of your stupid friends are making “fuck you money” in their faustian bargains. So you toss a bit of coin at these scandals and make some decent returns. Now the devil has got you by the nose, reeling you in like the guttersnipe that you are. You then toss all of you money into these bastard stocks, the market tumbles amidst homosexual greek tragedy, and your new job is chief rabbit skinner at your local haberdashery.

Do not give into your base and carnal instincts, you sub-mental morons. Your new found love for future accounting irregularities will be a one sided Wagnerian affair.

Stay the course, lads. Do not become the savage swine that your in-laws believe you to be. Moderate your excesses and avoid, at all times, becoming a craven bedlamite, whose sole purpose on earth is to vanquish his/her own net worth.

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12 comments

  1. rigged game

    With that teeny Willie he should be wearing a kilt.

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  2. gorby

    That is a lesson for so much in life.
    merci.

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  3. UncleBuccs

    Sage advice. Unfortunately, the young, hot money studs will not take heed. They have to learn the hard way. It’s just the cycle of life.

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  4. frog

    He’s probably talking about himself being almost dead. He doesn’t realize that his forebodings have nothing to do with the market.

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  5. budh

    Warren Buffet just said stocks are cheaper than bonds.

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  6. Anton

    Ha.

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  7. handyandy

    So why were you involved with a cheap rate budget airline stock? I told you on Friday that AAPL & CASY were good for a $2-3 pop… Cant go wrong with Pizza and Phones!!

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  8. profiteerer

    Rigged, it was cold when they took the picture.

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