iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,418 Blog Posts

Apparently, the Bears Won

I am aggrieved to inform you that the proverbial ‘Roche Limit’ for the bulls was breached today and now the great Sword of Damocles awaits your figurine like heads.

Let me explain.

According to foremost experts in the laws of investing, the market reversal today was a ‘supreme and absolute’ death knell into the psyche of investors. This is that walk in the park you don’t come home from.

I’ve placed myself, we’ve all placed ourselves, in a most heinous and invidious position. After six long years, over 2,000 sunsets, the bull market has concluded today. On this very day that I speak of, ghouls plot your destruction at the Holland Lodge. Bears masquerading as humans are lulling you into a false sense of security. The theatrical fertilizer that you call news will leave indelible marks upon your 4 figure portfolios.

Might I suggest, if I might be so bold, that you get your affairs in order? At the end of the day, we’re all drifters and wastrels. Some do it from abject squalor, housing tenements located in high crime/risk parts of the world–like many of you. Others do it from 10,000 sq ft tombs, walking the night in a home better suited for mannequins, instead of people.

Alas, the javelin throwers have succeeded and we’re all coxcombs to their dominant alpha position. Flee now, lads, while you still have the chance!

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36 comments

  1. berniecornfeld

    It was fun while it lasted.

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  2. vandamme

    Nonsense. Ath’s by June.

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  3. xxxhuggiebearxxx
    xxxhuggiebearxxx

    To confirm this state of affairs, HUGGIEBEAR is now 110% long after missing nearly the entire 6 year run. One does not jump on a bandwagon this late and profit, i do not think.

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  4. BlueStar: Contrarian Investor
    BlueStar: Contrarian Investor

    Who is actually net short right now? Please identify yourselves.

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  5. BlueStar: Contrarian Investor
    BlueStar: Contrarian Investor

    In the interest of reverse psychology I urge everyone to ignore The Fly to cover all shorts and go long the open.

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  6. figesmalls

    So let me get this straight (extra no homo), just this morning you were plotting the demise and planning suggestions of sympathies for the bears and now after a painful reversal you are doing a 180 degree change?
    You’ve mentioned your ability and right to change your mind…so I ask politely and most humbly,,,,Is it possible you could be wrong on this?

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    • Dr. Fly

      Figesmalls

      I guess you missed the sarcasm that is dripping from this post.

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      • BlueStar: Contrarian Investor
        BlueStar: Contrarian Investor

        Ok everyone. Shows over. Go back to your hovels.

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      • figesmalls

        Sincerest apologies O great one. Especially, since OA recently posted that the oils after a four month period were going to make a comeback.

        My faith is restored!

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  7. frog

    For those of you who don’t know what the Roche Limit is:
    “the distance within which a celestial body, held together only by its own gravity, will disintegrate due to a second celestial body’s tidal forces exceeding the first body’s gravitational self-attraction”
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roche_limit

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  8. frog

    I’ll bet people here thought Roche Limit was part of Elliott Wave.

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  9. zheeeem

    My fallout shelter is filled with gold and fig newtons for exactly this reason.

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  10. heaterman

    Herr Doktor, please tell this lowly plebeian maggot what in particular about your tea leaves, leads you to this conclusion

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  11. ironbird

    The buyback no mas Viacom news could be a huge problem. Apparently the executive class has been paid. Yesterday.

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    • ironbird

      But hey! It is only a Bernie type move. A slight pause in the TWENTY BILLION buyback. WTF. Is the whole game a fucking scam? Popeye cheeseburger shit.

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  12. og

    I guess Fly needs a /s tag on these posts now.

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  13. Marc David

    There are no bulls.. just fresh 401k money. Moving from one place to another.

    The only bears are hedge funds for risk reasons and a few crazy people.

    No downside. None.

    I don’t think anybody really knew what would happen with QE. And I don’t think they’ll really know what will happen when/if the interventions stop.

    One things for sure.. current prez isn’t going out with a crash. So until then, full steam ahead!

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    • ironbird

      Do not forget the “war on women”. We must ban together to fight all deniers.

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  14. banjoman

    Our beloved Bull Market has 5 more years left to run. There will be fits and starts, but the spoils will go to those who had the intestinal fortitude to stay long.

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  15. budh

    There is no ‘Roche limit’ since they bot Genentech.

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  16. ggarbacz

    Le Fly I agree the last two days wefaded at 1:00 and 12:00 reminds me of 2/25 and 2/26 that said pay attention to MDY as it is the leader of the band now and a new 52 week high would bring along the other suspects IWM followed by SPY and then DIA.

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  17. gnat

    Amazing how gay everyone looked back in the 70’s (extra homo). I didn’t notice it then but now it’s so obvious.

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    • frog2

      you’ve just unintentionally verified your age and admitted to illegally browsing this website as per the rules

      get ready to be killed, grandpa

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