iBankCoin

HERE COMES THE GRANDE FINALE

Who’s happy to see ZOES come public today? Just think, we get to see another 10 or so IPOs next week. Quite frankly, I think I’m gonna run out of popped corn watching these things.

Let’s talk turkey.

No one is going to step in front of this market on a very scary Friday the 11th afternoon when car recalls captivate the American public and THE BLOOD MOON looms in the not-do-distant future.

The Nasdaq is plunging again and nothing can arrest it. Remember, crashes happen when markets are weak, not strong.

We are readying to crash; get your helmets ready. The very thing that is so hard to predict, the black swan of black swans, is happening right in front of your eyes. Everyone is running towards treasuries and utility stocks because the flight is on. NOTHING can stop the sellers of WDAY, FEYE, YELP and SPLK, as they have an infinite amount of shares and there are literally ZERO buyers of those stocks.

All of the asset managers are away, golfing, prepping for easter dinner, blood moons, things of that nature.

If you are short, sit back and enjoy the shit show. We will crash because we have to crash. There is no other way out.

Ciao.

NOTE: Grandma Yellen is preparing for bedtime, as she has two doctor’s appointments tomorrow morning, one at 6am and another at 7am. She will be in bed by 5pm and is very happy because she got to travel into town today to buy a new broach, in celebration of her new role at the Federal Reserve.

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115 comments

  1. Genghis Khan

    Is that what The PPT is flagging? Just yesterday you said it was flagging OS?

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    • The Fly

      Yes, another signal today. Do you doubt the powers of The PPT? Surely you cannot be serious.

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      • Genghis Khan

        No disrespect Fly, I mean that. This is a maddening game. I only ask because I always wonder, if one can build a tool to make such accurate predictions, wouldn’t stock investing be less risky?

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    • The Fly

      I bet you would’ve made fun of Babe Ruth for striking out every so often too, if given the chance.

      Or how about that Ty Cobb!!? That bastard got out 60% of the time. What a loser!

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      • Profligate Spendgate Activated
        Profligate Spendgate Activated

        Kool aid, kool aid for everyone!

        Somehow this site is just teeming with millionaire sophisticates who use a magical rangebound indicator like a smooth RSI rebranded to time the lows in a five year bull market!

        And Genghis, you dare doubt the powers of this ethereal otherworldly wonder that a man with no background in mathematics developed out of charity?

        For shame

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        • The Fly

          I’d hardly call myself a “sophisticate” as you call it. I’m more of a rustic, workaholic, weight training, ill tempered, yet composed, man of some means.

          What sort of person are you?

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        • Tough but fair

          Uff. Brutal.

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      • J Livermore

        Amen.

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  2. SGT HARTMAN

    Half the IPO’s are off, no bids.

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  3. Birdman

    Hilarious, thank you for these. They are really helping me get through the crash of 2014.

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  4. alf44

    .
    … the 4000 level is a pretty crucial area of SUPPORT on the NAZ Daily Chart !

    Being tested NOW !

    Will it hold ?

    .

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    • alf44

      .
      … “crucial” … an understatement !
      .

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    • alf44

      .
      … NAZ Close @ 3999.73 !

      So, for all practical purposes it held that crucial 4000 level !

      Interestingly it also printed an “Inverted Hammer” today … which can be considered a somewhat positive sign ! FWIW

      Next week should be interesting !
      .

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      • metalleg

        Unless one of the central banks steps up to the plate this weekend, ECB most likely in my opinion, the hemorrhaging will continue next week.

        Probably get some pinning due to OPEX so perhaps volatility will be muted.

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      • pgwarner

        So did SPY

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  5. kdog

    Ciao? Ugh

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  6. Anton

    Nice broach, Miss Yellen.

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  7. THEY WILL KNOW ME BY THE TRAIL OF BLOOD
    THEY WILL KNOW ME BY THE TRAIL OF BLOOD

    How many miles per hour below the speed limit was Yellen cruising at on her way to her broach purchase?

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  8. Blang

    Glad to see what you’re missing in monetary gains you’re making up for in impressive witticism

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  9. bchu12

    PPT shouldve been flagging oversold by now but i don’t see any buying. Just shows, no market indicator can predict a bounce when shit hits the fan

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    • J Livermore

      You need to take indicators in context ladies. Yes, it’s oversold, but who is buying going into the weekend. It’s a very accurate tool when used properly. So many fucking babies running around in adult bodies.

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      • pgwarner

        Do not complicate the situation with reason Mr Livermore. Incessant whining is much more cathartic for the masses.

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  10. longview

    Where’s the real PPT when you need it?

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  11. Bdubz

    I am buying YELP today. I want to own it long term and would be more than happy to see it get all the way down to the 40s.

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  12. Badduck

    Where are the Seeking Alpha clowns with their “stocks are worth nothing” articles.

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  13. The Real Muppet

    Time to bounce into Monday. Have a Great Weekend!!!

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  14. Belly of the Beast
    Belly of the Beast

    More filters than Maxwell House, and no one notices ECOL ?

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  15. The Fly

    EBOLA IS COMING

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  16. Formerly DMG

    I bought WETF @ $11.40 so i can participate in the stations of the cross next week.

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  17. The Real Muppet

    Dont shit your pants

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  18. butchbr73

    I’m a little disappointed we won’t get another 10% down w/ $FEYE… something is amiss here, doesn’t feel right.

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  19. wsp

    FEYE to fill the gap back in early Jan. It is a premier company, just got a little ahead of itself!

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  20. Jeremy

    Buy now, sell for big profit Monday. The big balls trade.

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  21. lplongo

    I don’t want money anymore, long a few weekly TNA calls at the bell. Brewster’s Hundreds!

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  22. snoozemr

    what really sucks is that Ackman is making his money back. and all the weed pennies are going bust (not really). and my f***ing 400 share allotment from ZOES. their chicken salad is pretty good though, really.

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  23. joe

    I’m only down 39% ytd. Can’t wait for Monday guys.

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  24. Jeremy

    Yelps reviews are not reliable and are easily manipulated. I have proof of this. But the mobile app is great and I use it daily.

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  25. Train Wreck

    If this makes any of you feel any better, at least you’re not down 97.5% like me. Unbelievable but true. Go ahead, feel free to point and laugh at me, I deserve it. Just buy me a beer:

    http://trainwrecktrader.wordpress.com/

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    • snoozemr

      life is honestly too short to drink cheap beer

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    • Bullish

      Wow! No offense man, but do yourself a favor and buy some mutual funds next time. GL

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    • The Fly

      Train wreck

      You should paid 4 years to Harvard. The money lost was not for nothing. You will learn from tj and keep it with you for the rest of your life. You will be back.

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    • Honest ABE, nohomo, DOCTORISH YaFeelMe
      Honest ABE, nohomo, DOCTORISH YaFeelMe

      FUCK !

      I aint seen a railing like dat since da Iron Shiek n Nikolai Volkof beat da US Express at the first wrestlemania

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    • OG

      Sucks. Never want to see shit like that.

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    • Trading_Nymph

      Train…What Bar do you want to meet at? You truly deserve a Beer.

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    • Swinging for the Fences
      Swinging for the Fences

      Train Wreck – no laughing here – let’s grab a beer!

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    • Train Wreck

      Thanks guys, I assure you this is 100% real, I am obviously keeping my identity private and created the blog name after the fact. But I was hoping to share my story a little in a public forum, since I can’t actually tell anyone I know and keeping it bottled up makes it tougher.

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      • SCJ

        Sorry to read this. Best wishes. Can’t write more, maybe people will think it’s trite.

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      • Moonshot

        Sorry man. Seems like cautionary tale about using too much margin. Very different risk level between betting a lot on a single stock long, to using 100% margin betting through earnings for another stock, multiple times in succession.

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        • AJ

          Train wreck….You might not be cut out for trading but just in case you want to give it another go, I will give you a little bit of humble advise. Read all the trading books you can, especially the ones with emphasis on trading psychology. It looks like you were panicking. Use a longer time frame chart, look for longer trends, this will help you hold on through the down trends. I use a daily. When I first started I used 5 minute charts. You can’t make money trading in and out of stocks in one day, you have to hold for the bigger moves. Start smaller, don’t put everything in one stock. If you have your entire account in one stock and it moves down, you are more likely to panic. Practice with a paper account, although it does not match using real money, it will help some. Learn from a mentor, I suggest OA,you can learn a lot from him. Most everyone else on the Internets are full of crap, Except IBC, This is one of the rare sites that are not totally full of it. Good luck, I am truly sorry and hope you can recover. BTW my largest one day loss was 40k back in 1999 and it was devastating at the time. I recovered, and am now retired. Hang in there

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  26. Jeremy

    Just act like the money you lost you never really had and start over. I do this at the start of every month ????

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    • jb

      I did this on April 1. And on April 11 I am feeling the pain again. Now what? Just wait until May?

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    • Honest ABE, nohomo, DOCTORISH YaFeelMe
      Honest ABE, nohomo, DOCTORISH YaFeelMe

      MAH DUDEz gues what time it iz playbwois

      _________________00__________________
      ________________0000_________________
      _______________000000________________
      ____00_________000000__________00____
      _____0000______000000______00000_____
      _____000000____0000000___0000000_____
      ______000000___0000000_0000000_______
      _______0000000_000000_0000000________
      _________000000_00000_000000_________
      _0000_____000000_000_0000__000000000_
      __000000000__0000_0_000_000000000____
      _____000000000__0_0_0_000000000______
      _________0000000000000000____________
      ______________000_0_0000_____________
      ____________00000_0__00000___________
      ___________00_____0______00__________

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      • Honest ABE, nohomo, DOCTORISH YaFeelMe
        Honest ABE, nohomo, DOCTORISH YaFeelMe

        Still :'( :'( Jen-boo aka platinum pussy left my ass :'(

        If yall didn know we finsihed

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        • jules

          What up Abe tho? I heard uz waz out the jon.

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          • Honest ABE, nohomo, DOCTORISH YaFeelMe
            Honest ABE, nohomo, DOCTORISH YaFeelMe

            nah dawg we was getting intimate like big spoon little spoon on da homies couch n I fucked up her new Kors bag real bad, last straw

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  27. gatorsun

    +.003 For my man Fly

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  28. I Am Jesse Livermore

    NDX will bounce after hitting the 3,350-3,425 range. Can’t say yet whether that will be *the* bottom.

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  29. Jeremy

    You will go broke and off yourself

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  30. schizo168

    i just spoke to allah, he said market never crash in april

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  31. Trading_Nymph

    You know Fly, I should Be Jumping Up and Down and doing the Bear Happy Dance right now. But with everything that has happened since 2009, I don’t think I will ever be able to do the Bear Happy Dance because at any moment a Broach Wearing Coke Dealer can put so more air in this bubble. So no Bear Dancing, well maybe a little at SPX 1220ish. I still think SPX 1755ish was the top, only problem is that the market and everyone else didn’t agree.

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  32. The margin dude

    Dear all, please check your voicemails!

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  33. Hideous fibs

    Hysterically laughing clown rapist on my messages….must be friday

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  34. alf44

    .
    … well, in an effort to try and bring something positive to an absolutely horrendous string of trading days for YELP, SPLK, FEYE & WDAY …

    … all 4 of these stocks appear to be at or near areas of SUPPORT and “should” … catch a bounce next week !
    —–
    How Do You Spell Relief ???

    YELP @ around $60ish (currently $61.72)
    SPLK @ around $55ish (currently $57.68)
    FEYE @ around $45ish (currently $47.33)
    WDAY@ around $70ish (currently $71.86)
    .

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  35. Hideous fibs

    In other uplifting news: Lowes has hanging rope on sale

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    • seekingprofits

      How about Harbor Freight running a special on nail guns and air compressors?

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  36. No One

    Train-
    TD is a scam (which one isn’t?). You should have stayed away. I wouldn’t be surprised if they take positions against you. They ruined TOS too.

    But then the whole “market” is a scam. Desinged to steal all your money. So sad to see what it does to so many people.

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    • Train Wreck

      I don’t blame anyone but myself. Chasing a $500 dollar loss with huge bet after huge bet. And going on a relentless losing streak. Just wondering how many others have this same problem as me, combined with horrible luck and timing.

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      • xxxHuggieBearxxx D.P.M
        xxxHuggieBearxxx D.P.M

        Its not luck….you have no edge, no risk control, and excessive leverage that guaranteed your eventual tilt. Anyone could have told you this would be your outcome.

        Its not a video game (for the most part).

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        • Train Wreck

          Agreed, that’s why I wonder if I must be the worst trader ever

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          • xxxHuggieBearxxx D.P.M
            xxxHuggieBearxxx D.P.M

            Actually, you are pretty typical. Someone has to pay the banks.

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          • Dr. Fly

            I know of worse stories.

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          • alf44

            .
            … read the 2 Market Wizards books by Jack Schwager !

            Both GREAT books with interviews with some of the greatest traders of our lifetime !

            Almost without exception ALL of them “blew up” … at least once !
            .

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          • alf44

            .
            … that said … pretty sure NONE of them displayed the utter incompetence of “Train Wreck” !

            No offense intended !
            .

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          • Train Wreck

            No offense taken, I’ve already been humbled by my reckless trading, trying to get it all back with one trade

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          • Trading_Nymph

            Train, Ahhh I have been a Bear Since 2009, I think you have nothing to worry about. I may not have the title, but I am a runner up.

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    • No One

      Bad luck is if ~50% is wrong. Your luck is determined by non-random forces. The markets are rigged.

      Yes, you did do it wrong, and you are responsible. But if you did it right, you still probably would lose. Wrong can be right in this market. And you don’t get to make that call.

      Too many people get trapped in this, you are certainly far from being alone (claim is 90% get it wrong)- 100 year old companies go bankrupt, remember Lehman? I can almost gurantee you most people who are reading this now have been through some bad experience one time or another. You needed to have more consevative positions to lean on.

      The relentless pumping with the media and hedge funds drive people into this rigged game, and where are they when it comes crahing down?

      It was never supposed to be this way.

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  37. xxxHuggieBearxxx D.P.M
    xxxHuggieBearxxx D.P.M

    Thanks to Brazlia, I am outperforming the S&P for the first time in two years.I had a decent year last year, but crushed by the massive S&P 30% gain.

    I think this is the beginning of my long awaited turn-around.

    I’ve learn I’m just horrible in run-away relentless bull markets.

    But, I’m still down almost 1% on the year, so not exactly killing it.

    I will, though.

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  38. matt_bear

    The funniest thing about Train Wrecks trade log is that short LNKD was a monster in the making.

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    • Train Wreck

      That’s how bad of a trader I am, I started the day confident of going short LNKD. The I switched long, then short again, then long. After getting burned for $70k on TWTR the night before, I had zero confidence and every tick scared me.

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      • velth

        Your position size was too large, every tick scared you cuz it was a large percent of your account. Earnings plays are tough to manage risk. Thanks for sharing, I will remember your trading log every time I confirm and send a trade.

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  39. matt_bear

    LOL @ “But I’ll play it conservative this time around, learned my lesson. Fingers crossed for this fresh start.

    Anyways, tired of earning 0.5% interest on my cash in my savings account… Need to invest for the future.”

    THIS….is exactly why we are crashing. These momo’s are loaded up with people doing all-in trades with their life savings. The market is a deadly beast that smells this kind of prey and fucking murders you for a snack.

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  40. matt_bear

    Train wreck, I’m far from a good trader….but at least using the art of TA and patterns always someone to establish rules, entry and exit points. You have to have a plan and execute….you weren’t trading, you were playing $100k lotto tickets.

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  41. Mr.Partridge

    Very sad this comments section, probably the saddest in months.. stay safe people .

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  42. Flanki

    Lets have an ibankcoin get together and buy train wreck some beers…on margin of course.

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  43. matt_bear

    Nymph- can you please stop calling 1755 a top. lol

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  44. kea

    WHY THE FUCK AREN”T YOU USING YOUR POSITION STOPS

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  45. ironbird

    It is impossible to trap bears that cover in every possible hole. We need dedicated shitters. The end of the world “i told you so” cocksuckers. Beating chests while terrorizing young children with stories of “how it is supposed to be”.This is a problem.

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  46. ironbird

    Is there a bear left still quoting the death trade back to 666? They want to play the bounce as bad as the bulls want to catch one. We need more fucking coke.

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  47. jesus

    the comments sections has turned into a cesspool of degenerate gamblers

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    • Frog

      What do you expect, Jesus? Stock trading is hard. Most people who do it are degenerate gamblers. Surely your Father In Heaven told you about this, no?

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  48. matt_bear

    The temptation for the home run is toughest to overcome. With a 10k account, you’re 7 trades away from a million bucks. lol

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  49. Code Fucking Red
    Code Fucking Red

    There is no catalyst. The subprime crisis is contained. We are not in recession. There is no bubble. There is no crisis. bla bla bla

    In the very near term there is little evidence that I can see to suggest the economy is tilting over into recession…Alan Greenspan – July 1990

    With all our concerns about the next several quarters, there is still in my judgement, ample evidence that we are experiencing only a pause in the investment in a broad set of innovations that has elevated the growth rate and productivity …bla bla –
    Alan Greenspan – may 24, 2001

    Despite all the financial turmoil, the economy avoids recession etc…etc..bla..bla… Helicopter Ben Bernanke – December 11, 2007

    The Federal Reserve is not currently forecasting a recession – Ben Bernanke – January 2008

    The risk that the economy has entered a substantial downturn appears to have diminished over the past month of so – Bernanke 6/9/2008

    ROFLMAO!

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  50. ironbird

    There is one trade that stands alone. More crowded than liberals at a donkey show. The short vol trade. If the deadly VXX even slightly represents the other side of that trade? It is good.

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  51. Metalleg

    Quick, someone ask Obama if it’s a good time to buy stocks!

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  52. css1

    Train, imho, you’re extremely visual, and thus ticks, movements have an effect on you’re mind, almost as if you’re a fighter in a fight……….i’d also bet you have a fear of heights in general, thus, falling from high places means major injury subconsciously, so if they go red and red fast many triggers are triggered…………..part of it imho is u would be considered by friends and family of the warrior, gladiator mode, in real life u can always use ur personal power to prevail………….in the market nyet…….where as ur visual is probably acute top 1-3%, hearing….is part of your survival mechanism, so a little tickling of bushes puts u on alert, thus u go into high stress alert mode, end up changing research view…………best guess is you have no one to discuss you’re decision making in reference to the market for a few hours a day VERBALLY, so learning is not coming in comparison to work u put in………..no one in my circle wants to talk markets zero, it’s just makes it harder because in general in corp world we all came from it’s what we do verbally discuss decision making and we each have our own amount we need…..hoped that helped good luck

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  53. Jennifer

    Train do not feel bad, u are wetter than nymph, imagine being a bear for 4 fucking years during one one of the biggest bull market runs Jon history, talk about being a dumb stubborn batch, btw we are still in the bull market this is just a little cleansing of some pussies and some dumbasses who were super long bullshit unprofitable ratchet tech stocks (ahem, fly) 🙂

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  54. Jennifer

    *better than nymph (haha def not wetter, she spends most of her time on her back and knees)

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  55. css1

    here’s a fun exercise take ur pointer and put it on march 7th 2014, run thru 100 of ur favorite charts, imho, hft’s rule this market………best guess iwm is at 200 dma, we go up for a few days, last of 401k money put to work, and ???? imho, no earnings reports will be good enough, aug-oct of 2011 is imho, what we will experience

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