iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,445 Blog Posts

Howitzer to the Face

Fuck this bullshit. SHLD missed by several square miles. As a result, shares are getting lit the fuck up in pre-market trade. I am taking my money and walking for the exits. I know when the game is no longer viable. This shit you see here, specific to the pinless hand grenade action in certain stocks, is a sure fire way to lose it all. The Dow is creeping higher, while select stocks and sectors are quietly getting obliterated. Next thing you know, the market corrects in earnest and those earnings bastards fall another 15-25%.

A great man once said “fuck this shit and fuck those firemen.” I could not agree more. For one, stocks have treated me badly this year. I believe it’s some sort of witchcraft that is plaguing me. I will need to make sacrifices and cleanse my spirit of whatever demons that chase me. And, secondly, for the most part firemen sit around the firehouse all day, giving each other blowjobs and cooking up fancy meals.

“The Fly” doesn’t have time for fancy meals. It’s granola bar and go. It’s 10 cups of coffee before noon, brush my teeth 20 times, and sell it all.

Granted, I’m hell bent on keeping my refinery holdings. For the sake of all that is honorable and just in this world, if the criminals who mug me at the pump every day are not banking coin, no one is. Then this whole experiment called life is a fraud and I have nothing to worry about, since I’m moving to Puma Punku anyway.

My SHLD loss will come in at around 7%. As of yesterday’s close, I was up 1.5% on the position. However, it’s the anti-climatic nature of this swing that makes me want to take a fucking howitzer, park it in the parking lot of my local K-mart, and start assaulting it with egregious volleys from hell.

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47 comments

  1. Cheesetrader

    Take a Craftsman Tool Box and and whack ’em upside their Kenmore

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  2. Raule

    I’m just outside of Detroit, where everyone is “poor as fuck” yet car traffic is the exact same. People are still driving big ass pickups, hauling air. Hoop-rods are still doing 75 m.p.h. on 8 mile, emitting egregious amounts of toxic fumes. How the fuck am I to think it’s any different in the rest of our grande nation?

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    • Jakegint

      Some people live for the jacked up 4×4.

      That’s just the way its, and you can never change it.

      ________

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  3. Jakegint

    It’s granola bar and go. It’s 10 cups of coffee before noon, brush my teeth 20 times, and sell it all.

    Might I recommend some Colon Blow for even quicker effect?

    ______

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  4. Rat Fink

    Rat Fink took a sword to the face, got banned to the “fag box” and it cost him a sacrifice of two slaughtered goats to get out alive – the Gods were angry!

    For the chart monkeys and burlap-clad bear shitters – multiple negative divergences on the S&P in the 15 minutes timeframe and a possible ending diagonal (wedge) – but you probably knew that already

    Just saying …

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  5. Brad

    I feel you on this one fly. Cost basis around $80 and just got jacked.

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  6. drummerboy

    fucking eddie lampert, thats why you lost……….! eddie lampert couldnt sell a bag, to a bag lady.

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    • ruggyup

      You are right but, what he would do is steal a bag from a bag lady.

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      • drummerboy

        couldnt run mot either. he lost them 2 billion in cash,way back when.and still cant do a ceo’s job today.nothing has changed. what needs to happen is shld board should be hung. or run out of town.

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  7. jorge mann

    both SHLD and WNR are fucking me relentlessly

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    • Mike

      the only solution is ……..more cowbell

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      • drummerboy

        your gettin the “hillbilly longstroke”, wait for the spooge,it will splash everywhere,dont forget ur umbrella.

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  8. TMoe

    unloaded some silver here that I’ve been accumulation for over 1.5 years. waiting to pull the trigger and buy more maybe around 38

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  9. Mike

    more WNR @ $16

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  10. razorsedge

    the economy is not doing as well as i thought, people not paying there morgages r starting avon businesses, not buying washers dryers or lawn mowers, what happens when they/if they get kicked out ….what happens when the gov stops buying debt, qe3? what should i invest in? 80% cash and afraid to hold dollars,,gold silver? for the first time in my life im worried about the collapse of the dollar, sir fly any thoughts on this? 1 trsillion seconds is 32t years or so…(math might b wrong)

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    • Bullish

      I bet you also run around town shouting: “The sky is falling, the sky is falling!”

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      • razorsedge

        lol, dont have to yell from inside my concrete home,but thats not what im saying, im looking to make money, and lookig for ideas to protect myself. thats all. started a new business last year which is strugling at the moment, it is dependent on the price of deisel,the economy and confidence in the economy, so make ur remarks, but tell me something that helps.

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        • Bullish

          You forgot rule #1
          1. I do not accept financial advice from anyone, especially you.

          Also, why do you need deisel for Avon sales? Wierd!

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          • razorsedge

            thanks, i use deisel to make lipstick and baby formula

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  11. J. Livermore

    Bought the last of my WNR position just under $16.00. As totally and completely retarded as it is, I am all in now.

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  12. Random

    Stopped out of WNR.

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  13. Wilco

    Slathered my WNR with some VXX rub last week, wish I had dumped the whole bottle on it.

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  14. Rat Fink

    WNR now @ maximum pain

    The Gods are laughing

    Time to start slaughtering goats, gentlemen

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  15. Ankles

    $WNR taking it like a new fish in prison.

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  16. shipwrecked&alone
    shipwrecked&alone

    If they are short WNR due to debt and no one is going to listen to valuation, fundamentals or earnings, then WNR mgt needs to focus like a laser on a debt reduction plan layout over time in the conf call. That will get the shorts attention. WNR ability to carry out that plan simply comes down to how long the crack spread holds. 2Q is almost bagged up. Debt reduction more important than earnings. Selling the extra refinery to reduce debt is the best thing we can hear.

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  17. Bud Tender

    Just loaded up on WNR at $15.83, $1 stop. YEE HAW!

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  18. ruggyup

    “There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.” So said a wise one, who knew we’d be getting it where the sun doesn’t shine.

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  19. TMoe

    BOT OPEN May 100 puts at market open for a quick trade. Fall you overbought bitch!

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  20. lil homie

    Dam growin up I wanted to be a firefighter. I’m fucken glad I became a grease monkey instead.

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  21. TMoe

    This morningstar guy is an idiot

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  22. TeahouseOnTheTracks
    TeahouseOnTheTracks

    Fly, try going Mel Gibson on your rude guests … instead of banning them, take them hostage and sacrifice them to the Stock Market Gods ala the Mayan (rip their hearts out and cut their heads off) … that should please them and restore bountiful gains in your portfolio.

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  23. Wigger Toods

    Par for the course.

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  24. Alucard

    At the very least , buy the WNR puts and stop reading these make
    believe bloggers !!!!!!!!!!! jeezuz

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  25. Disgruntled WNR holder
    Disgruntled WNR holder

    Even if WNR were to achieve blow out earnings we will be lucky to break even on the stock!

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    • J. Livermore

      Gawd do you sound like a baby who isn’t getting his candy RIGHT NOW !!! Grow the fuck up.

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  26. AE

    Youll make it all back and more on WNR. Keep up the good work on stock picking/blogging(even though you dont care about it)

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  27. Nicola

    I only cook on weekends. Can you bring your Howitzer and do RIMM when you are done with K-Mart?

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  28. flyaway18

    Sold SHLD last April at $122, never looked back.

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  29. Gman

    Just bought a boat load of WNR……….

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