iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
21,503 Blog Posts

Burn Them All!

You chart chomping jackasses don’t stand a chance in this whipsaw market. You might as well give all of your money away to the homeless or kids with cancer now, before you lose that shit to some Goldman Sachs robot. It’s amazing to me that so many of you believe in technical analysis, as if it was some sort of religion. Do you know Santa Claus isn’t real? Are you aware to the fact that technical analysis was developed by people who had no market edge? It was developed by misfits, who were getting mugged by the markets daily, that tried to come up with some magic fairy dust, via charting stocks and indices by hand— every night for review.

The sad thing is, the very people who invented these indicators discarded them for the shit-heap, long ago. Yet, here you are EMBARRASSING yourselves daily, getting flattened out by rampaging gorillas.

On the other hand, I do believe in quantitative analysis, which contrary to what you may believe, is ENTIRELY different than drawing lines on charts or fucking around with idiot candlesticks—all subject to human error by faulty interpretation.

What needs to happen now is a full-fledged rout of the markets, in order to zero out some of the weaker players. All of you piker hedge fund managers, who made a nice bag of brick last year, are two trades away from being on the receiving end of mass redemptions. I will be more than happy to pick up your loss, AND MORE.

See folks, you can’t believe the charts. And, you can’t believe the fundamentals. The nice little earnings estimates that you have mapped out for BAC are worth less than an empty bottle of St. Ides.

What matters?

I will tell you. Asset allocation models, risk analysis, proper research and game plan, catalyst driven events, on the ground research and the God given gift to make accurate financial decisions. People ask me: “Fly, how are you able to make so many accurate calls, all the time, over such a long period of time?” My answer, as always: “do you ask a bird why it is able to fly, or why hungry mountain lions, trapped inside gay bars, tend to lack proper bar etiquette?”

No, of course you don’t. There are no short cuts, ladies. This game was designed for the very best to succeed, not some dork trading 5 figs out of Mom’s basement. Now go back to watching the military channel and make believe you are some valiant war hero, instead of the pencil pushing dipshit that you are in real life.

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100 comments

  1. Al

    people like you are why people like me are rich

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  2. alf44

    MOM !!!

    MAKE ME A HOT POCKET !!!

    .

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  3. arch

    although i will be carrying a pencil into battle soon i will have you know i will be sharpening it with a flame thrower

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    • Heaterman

      Speaking of burn them all and flamethrowers………….it seemed to me that this may possibly fit here.

      “the mere fact that flamethrowers exist means that someone, somewhere thought to himself……I want to set those folks over there on fire, but they are too far away”. Roughly attributable to George Carlin.

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  4. Hammy

    i think you’re right about technical analysis. i quit TA a few months ago. It’s nice to reach the point where you realize that you’re just not good at something, and to stop doing it.

    One thing that kept me going at it for such a long time was the success of the .01% who really are talented.

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  5. Count De Monet

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CqwAXk8c2Ew

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  6. Sam

    “…or why hungry mountain lions, trapped inside gay bars, tend to lack proper bar etiquette?”

    LOL. Only you could come up with weird imagery like this.

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  7. Non_Analyst

    It’s funny because, all of your readers are pen-pushing, dip-shit 24 year olds. right?

    Sincerely,

    Nondescript Analyst | Fortune 1000 company

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  8. The_Real_Hmmm

    Velcro to vampires, quantitative analysis is also full of complete morons who use poor sets of data and misinterpret statistical information.

    That said, I agree with everything you wrote. Unfortunately it was a long road to get here.

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  9. scott

    Folks; technical analysis it is just another analytical tool and shouldn’t be used in singularity.

    But it doesn’t stand still as it must be adapted to the changing market conditions…Learning what matters now is the secret to using it successfully…

    It’s also a great tool to articulate entry, stop and exit targets.

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  10. ibankbunk

    Why the fuck do you use tinyurl?

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  11. The Chart Addict

    Here we go again…lol

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  12. wabisabi

    aaaaaaggghhhhhhh, haaaaaaaahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaa. your analysis of technical analysis is technically unsound as it (TA) is quite applicable to current market conditions. QUITE. it does need to be be coupled with some discretionary analysis, that cannot be taught. and therein lies the problem with internet leeches, et al.

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  13. jimmie

    I enjoy sitting at my computer short 1000 shares of some over-owned and overvalued 200 dollar stock watching it tank 10 bucks in a day.

    It’s us little fucktwits that can bob and weave on a dime that can extract a few thousand here and there from the quant-bots on a daily basis.

    Don’t believe the hype and remember the human brain is only working at 6% capacity and those trade-bots are programmed by fucktwitted 6% efficient humans.

    Also remember that if those Israel Commandos reacted like they did the other day it’s just a matter of time until we all wake up to a 4500 point gapdown because Israel acted pre-emptively.

    Fuck Mahoud if he can’t take a joke~!

    Another 50 dolar cognac please kind sir 🙂

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  14. TheArtist

    Nap is killing it in the RC 2010 Stock of the Year contest.

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    • The Chart Addict

      yup, Nap is my student since 2008. we all played DCTH.

      TECHNICAL ANALYSIS had just teeny bit to do with it, I’m sure 😉

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      • Hammy

        i’m genuinely curious; does TA theory extend beyond securities? Have there been any TA studies in natural statistics or sociological trends?

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        • The Chart Addict

          charts and graphs are used to determine trends in econ, sociology, psych, and stat because TA maps out human behavior. Even moving averages are used – u can go to the bureau of labor statistics. Beyond charts, graphs, MA’s, I’m not aware of other applications.

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          • MOOBER

            Digital music downloads. For real.

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          • Get Yer Paper

            TA goes back several thousand years to rice trading in China, where candlestick charting began. If you study chaos theory you might know that when all activity is mapped, it eventually ends in a Mandlebrot formation. Then, all formations begin again with a new spark of life, which yields a tree of activity, of infinite proportion.

            That’s the ultimate TA. Time is a fractal that has already been mapped. This is why Fibonnacis work so well. To ignore the fractal of your own Universe is foolish, IMO.

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          • Jakegint

            Agreud. Fibonaccis are the most consistent.

            Take a look at the 61.8% retrace of the move down to the March 09 lows. We hit it almost to the the number. Of course, everyone faded it early, so we didn’t get there. More math (asymptotic curves).

            _________

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        • Dave

          One of the original zen masters of TA used it to trade rice in Japan hundreds of years ago. He was the Goldman Sachs prop desk of rice.

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  15. robert (rob_pvb)
    robert (rob_pvb)

    Celtics in six

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  16. alf44

    Dogs vs Cats …

    IBM vs Apple …

    Repubs vs Dems …

    Baldwin vs Bassinger …

    Chartists vs Funnymentalists …

    —–

    These battles have been waged since the beginning of … well … let’s just say …a really long time …

    AND … I would venture to guess that they will continue to be waged for … well … let’s just say … a REALLY long time !!!

    The jokes about “chart readers” … have indeed grown tiresome !!! imo

    .

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    • The Fly

      Shut up.

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      • alf44

        LOL !!!

        We’re ALL technicians (ie. chartists) on some level, Fly !

        Yes …EVEN YOU !!!

        Charts are as much a part of stock market analysis as an MLB Pitcher’s ERA is in evaluating his value in a starting rotation !

        When YOU post a chart … of the PPT with O/B & O/S readings … you are displaying your Market BIAS … graphically !!!

        —–

        That makes you …at least … on some level … a “chart monkey” like alot of us !

        Welcome to the club … “chart monkey” !!! LOL

        .

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        • Get Yer Paper

          I’ll bet if you take apart and reverse engineer the PPT system, the numbers it generates are based on one or more of the three classic technical indicators — volume, price, and sentiment (puts/calls ratio).

          The Fly is expert at leading the masses by implementing chaos. Say one thing, do another.

          Anyhow, this explains why the PPT works so well. It reminds me of a numbers-based technical system I built a few years ago. As we all ultimately learn, TA is half the battle. The other half is money management, which is what Fly excels at.

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  17. Rand

    “its a great tool for entry, exit targets?”, dude, is it tour heat seaking moisture missile you are talking about?
    Cause its not the way fly goes, and from what i read here, he is doing better than fortune 500 companies reading the market.

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  18. KWT

    Charting would be similar to tracking Lotto numbers. You may notice some trends, ID some patterns, but you CANNOT predict the future.

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    • alf44

      THAT is just … fuckin’ …well … misguided ! (with all due respect)

      .

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      • KWT

        My horoscope indicated that there may be some confrontation today..

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  19. scum bucket bitchez
    scum bucket bitchez

    To attribute any purported success in this market to fundamental analysis is disingenuous at best.

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  20. chump

    So what the hell is the PPT based on?

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  21. NYC Trader

    Love The Fly, But The Master is getting too cocky now.

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    • Jakegint

      Another non-technical indicator, fwiw.

      No worries, the suitcases are always half packed for Romania.

      _____

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  22. Jason

    At the risk of sounding gay–

    I love you man

    Btw I am trading 5 figures from my moms basement and a pencil pusher during the day.

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  23. Dani

    What Does Quantitative Analysis Mean?
    A business or financial analysis technique that seeks to understand behavior by using complex mathematical and statistical modeling, measurement and research. By assigning a numerical value to variables, quantitative analysts try to replicate reality mathematically.

    Quantitative analysis can be done for a number of reasons such as measurement, performance evaluation or valuation of a financial instrument. It can also be used to predict real world events such as changes in a share price.

    Sorry Fly for not wishing you a happy birthday. I was out of town swamped with meetings. I wished RC a happy B-Day and not you. Sincere apology my friend….

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  24. The_Real_Hmmm

    Weather.com assessment of hurricane-oil interactions.

    http://www.weather.com/outlook/weather-news/news/articles/oil-versus-hurricane-impacts_2010-05-28

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  25. alphadawgg

    Let me get this on the record….

    TA is like looking in the rear view mirror as you’re driving forward.

    T&A is all about looking at rears and fronts.

    Kimberly Guilfoyle is a good looking fox on FOX.

    It really is that simple.

    Jog on.

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    • alf44

      TA is like looking in the rear view mirror as you’re driving forward.

      —–

      Just a thought …

      While that MAY be …theoretically true …

      …when I look in MY rear view mirror … I ALSO SEE THE PASSENGERS IN THE BACK SEAT !!!

      And … well … they’re … IN THE CAR WITH ME !!!

      Think about it !!!

      .

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  26. Bullish

    Alf, its like you were reading my mind.

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  27. Get Yer Paper

    News for yaz….

    Daniel Estulin presented to the European Parliament today about Bilderberg’s plans — http://www.wnd.com/index.php?fa=PAGE.view&pageId=161377 , He was invited by senior members of parliament. That’s when you know the shit is getting serious over there.

    Estulin reports the following items will be on the Bilderberg Group’s 2010 agenda (June 3-6 in Sitges, Spain):

    Will the Euro survive?
    Development in Europe: Europe’s exit strategy … on hold?
    Do we have institutions to deal with the world economy?
    Greece: Lessons and forward-looking strategies
    NATO and Afghanistan: The practical agenda for the alliance
    Iran and Russia: Economic and financial threats to the alliance
    The consequences of war against terrorism
    The influence of domestic issues on American foreign policy
    The outlook for Japan’s economy
    The future of the U.S. dollar: Alternative scenarios

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  28. tradingnymph

    LOL. You are a fun teacher….I know the catalyst for this article….this site is way too much fun.

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  29. Le Fly

    I have never seen a chart i did no hate. Those words will be etched on my tombstone

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  30. 8

    Big Dan T lesson:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDd_ryixqyA

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  31. a fuckface of sorts
    a fuckface of sorts

    I don’t get how the fuck you trade short term without TA. I mean post earnings drift works, and anomolies like that but how the fuck you trade as quick as you do on fundamentals.
    quantative analysis- okay, so what do you do compare P/Es among similar stocks in the industry? Or PEG? or something else?

    Asset allocation models, okay great, rebalance portfolio to take advantage of people who get too trigger happy… I get that, but I prefer not to do it on daily to weekly gains
    risk analysis- more specific?
    proper research and game plan- such as… ? examples?
    catalyst driven events – I get this. Works great on low float stocks.
    I’m not equiped for this shit, but I still fucking try… why the fuck would I? because I’m a fucking addict. Somethig got in my head that I’m “investing” and making smart decisions for my financial future… but really it’s no different than playing casino…
    And at least at the casino I know when the odds are in my favor.

    Time to fuck it up and load up on ERX just for long enough until I can’t take the pain and sell, marking the bottom.

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  32. Le Fly

    Shut up.

    Rofl

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  33. Le Fly

    Why sleep when the natural is on?

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    • The_Real_Hmmm

      LOL. I just turned it on when he says, “Tomorrow, I wouldn’t bet against me.”

      The Fly was on earlier, amidst the crying Japan PM.

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  34. tradingnymph

    Ah Shanghai Metal Futures are ugly too tonight…of course Jap PM is leaving too. Eur/USD is holding so far over a key fibo level….buzz by Sean at Live is that there is a DNT just below that at 1.2100 that will be defended of course. Interesting thing about Shanghai Comp sell off is that of course it’s banks…but Car Makers are actually not hurting so bad cuz of subs for green cars tonight…amuses me. This is going to be an interesting NFP week.

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    • tradingnymph

      And Shanghai Comp rallys up into the close to almost flat, yet Copper Futures remained weak. buzz on bloomberg about hints of rate hike fwiw…I’ll go look for it for real…………..

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      • tradingnymph

        lol, it actually went green…I posted the rate gossip at Twitter

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  35. tradingnymph

    Hungry Cougars have proper bar etiquette.

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  36. MX2101

    Broadband OPEC. You heard it here first.

    From iBC Newsbot:

    http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/clusterstock/~3/wW_fKAIgR4E/att-eliminating-unlimited-internet-for-iphones-2010-6

    btw- bare minimum personal daytime Internet use for me is about 10 MB a day. This is just checking financial sites every hour or so. When I was metering a wireless card it was no problem hitting 3 GB in two weeks.

    I think a ramp up of “bandwidth” cost may impact content providers and be a twist on the road to the future.
    It may be discovered that demand is not elastic and supply is limited.

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  37. Factoria

    Hahahahaha Ohhhh… You are so witty. You should really marry my neighbor’s daughter..

    Besides,, don’t you know,, Jesus likes TA.

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  38. Mr. President

    Mr. Fly,
    Seeing some of your posts and comments at wee hours of the night, I can’t help but wonder…do you sleep? At all?

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  39. Le Fly

    Sleep is for wimps

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    • tradingnymph

      Spoken like a true Stock Junkie……Fly, I was pondering what I was missing in seeing your analysis of PPT scores into stock movement…I think I might have grasped it, I know, I am rather slow, but I am going to post my questions in my PPT forum….if you could stop by later.

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    • Dirk Diggler

      The fly is 4 guys. Everybody knows this.

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      • tradingnymph

        Dirk….Don’t care, I just need the junkie in the group…

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  40. TheArtist

    Fly, the iBC search, at least on my end is not working, it just goes to a new iBC home page that is blank….

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  41. Le Fly

    Rally wont hold

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    • Bullish

      Still don’t think the rally will hold today? I went long FAS at 22.66 today.

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  42. 500kmin

    Either the dow is going up 350 points from here, dollar/yen has to drop back to 91.4 or the YEN correlation theory is done… and its back to the Euro…

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    • ha

      either the stock market will go up or down, or trade sideways.

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  43. Banshee Rider

    I’d be the 21 year old pencil pusher also…but hey 5 figures is a place to start for me! I do alright for myself, I just like learning from you guys.

    I’ll be PPT once I put myself in a better position here soon; I love the brazen way things are put across here–keeps it interesting.

    I’ve studied a bit of TA; but for my personal goals I like having all of the pieces of the puzzle together before trying to assemble it. I don’t believe in one strategy, limited knowledge foundations.

    Up 8% intraday yesterday, shooting for similar today.

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  44. notadumfuk

    Rally won’t hold, eh? Look at the charts. We have had an abc (wave 4) correction of
    the second upwave (wave 3) of this bull market. We are ready to begin wave 5 of 5 up.

    Then after THAT we have a bear market (of sorts)

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    • Teahouse On The Tracks
      Teahouse On The Tracks

      Post a chart …. I don’t see the bull being that short and see us in Primary Wave2 (dwn) nearly complete now with Primary Wave3 (up) about to begin shortly (days or weeks) …. Wave3 up is the best wave of the bull and if you’re implying that 1045 thru 1220 was Primary Wave3 I think you’re wrong.

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  45. Purdy

    Buffett has grown increasingly full of shit.

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    • JF2

      Yeah, scenarios like this really show that his wholesome image is a bit contrived.

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    • Scipio

      He’s lost all credibility. I stopped taking him at all seriously last yr? when he was consorting/working w our govt “for the good of the nation”
      He sold his soul. Just another asshole cashing in at the country’s expense

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  46. tgarfield

    I have a chart of charting vs quantitative analysis. The lines on it say you might be wrong. I was going to show you, but I burnt it.

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  47. Le Fly

    Busy in meetings

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  48. Braveflaps

    Much thanks for the sight of the fortune cookie…even if it isn’t directed towards certain companies whose demise my armies will appreciate.

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  49. Macallan 50

    Jake Q:I puked in my mouth a little when you said “Japanese Scotch.”

    Purely reflexive.
    (much too funny #56)

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  50. Purdy

    Inspirational speaker? Dude sounds like Dukakis to me.

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  51. Joe McCann

    Read the tape. Period. Price action and sentiment boys and girls. TA is ancillary and not primary. TA is primary for folks who buy into the idea of “buy and hold”. Yeah that seems to be working just swell.

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