iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,433 Blog Posts

Here Come the Margin Clerks

You sit at your desk, with sweaty palms and a messed up hair do. Your enemy, the ASSHOLE MARGIN CLERK, approaches. She wants you to “magic jack” out of your positions, due to a potentially dangerous negative equity situation.

See, you’ve been shorting the nasdaq, via QID, for more than a month. It was your belief that the United Steaks of Fat Ass Americans were going to stop eating, drinking and wasting money on $500 shoes. In retrospect, you now realize how woefully wrong you are, short into the teeth of the sharpest reflation efforts in U.S. history.

Unfortunately, it is a lesson paid for with your soul, alongside your bullshit brokerage accounts.

The game is over. The clerk is taking matters into her own hands, since you chose to hide unde your desk, like a little bitch. Gleefully, she will liquidate your bullshit QID position at the least opportune time. She will wait for it to print a new intra-day low then fill your market order.

The moral of the story: never bet against the man in the time machine.

Top picks: UNG, ARD, FTK

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26 comments

  1. MarginClerk

    My favorite time to liquidate is around 10-11 am. Hopefully tomorrow I’ll get my chance.

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  2. JesusOfNazareth
    JesusOfNazareth

    Divergence between major indexes and CRE. No margin calls today.

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  3. GA

    I smell a reversal.

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  4. GR8

    Risk trades still holding up… ie. EUR/JPY is one looking like a breakout today. Watching for the rollover also.

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  5. pieface

    too many bulls spoil the broth – going down.

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  6. Made Man

    The market is bullet-proof. Fundamentals don’t matter, just the overcrowed short dollar/long oil trade.

    This is the end-game of this great rally. It’s been a blast. Shorts have been on the sidelines for weeks. Time to sell, sit back and get your short list ready. The biggest and best badass stocks that ran the most will correct the most.

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  7. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    In a fucking last ditch effort DEVILDOG’S wife trys to do a rally dance for the bears. I guess we will see if this works or not, notice his house has been downgraded.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95VRU3yKoE0&feature=related

    Quality…

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  8. Mushroomz

    “too many bulls spoil the broth – going down”

    too many pikers, going up

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  9. Guppyworldwide

    How did you know I have been holding QID for so long, have sweaty palms, and a shitty brokerage account? Man…are you entering my mind through my computer or some shit? you truly are some sort of Space Alien!

    Thank God it was only a small hedge against all of these wonderful longs that move at least 10% per day….every day!

    Which reminds me…Never EVER again go long a levered product…only short levered products!!!

    Lesson learned.

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  10. Ryan

    I dunno, I just finally got nervous about my longs.

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  11. Who Charted

    Watch that UNG trade…really significant trend line there. A close above 15.50 = buy ’em.

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  12. Big Mike

    I dont know…if we finish below 950, I will be short-term bearish…

    So far so good, we are bouncing around…hoping for a late day surge…

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  13. Anton Cigur

    Fly,

    Are your servers under attack again? The site is acting slow and “funny,” but not the usual kind of funny.

    Probably the death throes of some grizzly.

    _________

    Really sad to see Alpha go, though I’m happy for him.

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  14. Henry Fool

    here come year highs!!

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  15. mrkcbill

    Gappy

    Looks like Hal Mcrae with a pony tail

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kamDqL-AGzI

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  16. CavemanForecaster

    I really hope the market can close strong and finally break out of this frustrating 2 week range finally. I am sick of mother market teasing me!

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  17. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    Hehe true dat Mrkcbill.

    Who Charted: Looking for 15.20 not 15.50.

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  18. pieface

    everyone and their borther looking for the rally into the close – even the flee.
    Not gonna happen.

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  19. pieface

    everyone and their brother looking for the rally into the close – even the flee.
    Not gonna happen.

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  20. people, remember that the gubbmint is looking for the rally into the close…probably will happen

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  21. JesusOfNazareth
    JesusOfNazareth

    Nice fucking rally, Fly.

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  22. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    PONY TAILED!!!

    You fucking homo. I can’t wait until someone cuts that horse hair off.

    By the way drifting under 950, everyone watch it.

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  23. switchblade

    Time to start adding DUG at $15-ish

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  24. Snapini

    PAL is ready breakout?

    I’m in big.

    Meanwhile, the TSL looks ripe too.

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  25. Thunderpup

    I really wish I had not watched the DD “wife” video.

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  26. Indie

    that video is hypnotic.

    it’s a like a car crash. seriously. imagine this is your daughter and that’s the “best” skills she got. ridiculous. i bet she gets to get her ass pumped all right. get dem babies and that welfare check gets bonified.

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