iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,408 Blog Posts

A Special Emergency Message from your Government

Hey assholes. Quit worrying about Ambac and MBIA and go buy some bank stocks. We got it covered. All buyers of bank stocks will receive free shrimp and cheddar cheese. And, you may be able to win a flat screen tv.

Remember, we can kill you through bad food, medicine or pollution.

Government UPDATE: I remind you, both Ambac and MBIA are AAA rated.

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67 comments

  1. BanD

    Fuck the market. I’ve recently downloaded the following into my iPod:

    Aphex Twin, “I care because you do” : Saving this one for the day I try cocaine

    New REM: yawn. The soundtrack to every gen-x movie.

    Led Zeppelin BBC1 and 2: Phenominal. Anyone born after 1965 missed out on a lot of good $hit.

    Jimmi Hendrix BBC1 and 2: See above

    Public Enemy, “Apocalypse 91”: I was 12 when this came out. Good stuff. I just kicked REM to the curb and started playing it, and my dick grew 2 inches soft.

    American Ganster soundtrack: for when I open the barber shop

    MadLib: Beat Konducta, Vols. 3-4: WOW. Hip-hop with old Bollywood samplpes mixed in, amongst other things. I love this one.

    Clockwork Orange, soundtrack: The revolution will not be televised.

    Portishead, “Third”: Someone shoot this bitch in the vocal cords. Whine whine whine. The DJ has been the best part of Portishead since forever.

    Mims, “This is why I’m hot” single: I’m hot cause I’m FLY, you ain’t cause you NOT. (feel free to use)

    Jay-Z, “Greatist Hits” and “American Gangster”: eeeeeh. JZ is great, but at the same time, not so great.

    Gorillaz: “D-sides”: Excellent.

    The Doors: “The future starts now”. Ok, I think the doors are bullshit. The guy died at like 19, and he sang about all sorts of life experiences. Studio rappers, basically.

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  2. CubsRock

    I was para sailing up in the mountains this morning and taped this footage of The Fly:

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  3. The Fly

    Boomer:

    Why the name change?

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  4. boca

    I want my Government cheese, and I want it now!

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  5. Woodshedder

    The Nasdaq is being propped up by a friggin’ toothpick.

    70% of Nasdaq stocks are declining.

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  6. CubsRock

    VMW closing the gap, what the cock is that shit? Keep an eye on TSO may break down through $27

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  7. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    FXP is overbought (sic) according to Dennis Kneale, odd no? I am buying some here.

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  8. hmmmm

    i think that toothpick is msft. ballmer is probably the cause of the “shortage” of food too.

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  9. Mushroomz

    Does anyone else have excelphobia? I am very frightened when using excel, god I hate that program.

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  10. WallStreetLurker
    WallStreetLurker

    BanD:

    You plan on partying with the Lady while listening to Apex Twin? A little downbeat, don’t you think?

    Any one else think that AAPL is going to have a bit of trouble going forward selling $2K laptops and $400 phones in this environment?

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  11. WallStreetLurker
    WallStreetLurker

    Without Excel, my life would be impossible

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  12. CAP

    Dennis Kneale when to the Congo and had his penis stolen. True Story .

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  13. Granpa

    DUG looks like it wants to breakout on an hourly chart! How can that be will oil going to $150 in a straight line?

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  14. green writer

    AAA = AIDS 3x over

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  15. BanD

    WSL,

    Maybe not. There’s got to be some drug that goes well with that music. I felt a little violated after listening to it.

    AAPL will sell $2K laptops and $400 phones to rice farmers and their extensive families.

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  16. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    WallStreetLurker: I agree re: Excel.

    With ABK and MBIA there is a charade going on here. These are not AAA machines, they are polished turds. If there is one thing Cramer got right its that these agencies are criminal in their ratings.

    Woodshedder does FXP look due for a bounce technically on RSI2

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  17. calvino

    Jakey, watching the rollover on ANF?

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  18. JakeGint

    New AAPL pricing program:

    iPhones for two bags o’ rice anna sacka patatas.

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  19. JakeGint

    Calvin —

    Like a golden eagle watching a Romanian goat on a cliff.

    Looking for some “acceleration” here.

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  20. BanD

    Nibbled on a little FXP with OPM

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  21. WallStreetLurker
    WallStreetLurker

    BanD and Jakey:

    Good point. Rice farmers can use AAPL products to call in their gorilla freedom fighters to shoot food rioters on site if they try to steal their stash of pure, high grade, uncut rice.

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  22. WallStreetLurker
    WallStreetLurker

    Also, those same farmers can use their AAPL products to keep track of which govt officials they have paid to look the other way when they try to smuggle out their lumpen marching grain. Damn those pesky export bans.

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  23. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    BREAKING NEWS: Power lunch calls a bottom (15th time now) and Dennis Kneale says we will skirt this recession entirely. Consumer is in great shape paying $100 to fill up their car each week. Oddly enough I know people who pay $300 a month for their rent however they pay $400 per month in gas for their car. Very odd.

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  24. green writer

    Hey Fly,

    Were those shrimp caught with KIDS KIDNAPPED FOR CHILD SLAVE LABOR??????????????????

    Always buy child labor free products.

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  25. BanD

    WSL:

    If someone with multimedia skills (Danny) video-edits the scene from American Gangster where he goes over to Thailand to meet directly with the Heroin guy, only makes it about Rice, it would make IBC history.

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  26. CNBC

    Funny, we don’t have a Dennis Kneale on the payroll.

    Who keeps letting that shithead in here?

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  27. JakeGint

    DSL now at prices last seen….

    … in AUGUST OF 1996!

    Woohoo! Wotta bargain!

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  28. Fabregas

    Bought FXP @ $65.2

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  29. Dan-O

    Fuck stocks, I’m buying guns and ammunition and taking to the high seas. I bet hedge fund managers are a hell of alot tamer when I have the fucking firepower.

    Fuck AAPL, overpriced fucking hardware for easily persuaded idiots. It’s a hedge fund playground stock, big time.

    Fuck rice, Condasleeza and ‘A-RONI, the global inventory is unaudited and HIGHLY questionable.

    Oh and Fly, all due respect to a fellow Mets fan, don’t fight the tape… Be rich, not right.

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  30. yikes

    I guess that sell to close order on my once-highly-profitable LNN calls won’t fill today. Sweet Jesus.

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  31. Woodshedder

    Gapping, FXP is ripe for a bounce. RSI(2) in real time is at 2.

    Keep in mind though that it may stay oversold for 1-3 days before rebounding. Testing done over the past year shows an average drawdown of around 4% on each position.

    I may nibble some myself, into the close.

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  32. Mushroomz

    thats why you sell options to open, buy them to close or let them expire worthless

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  33. Gregory

    OK, is it just me, or am I the only one who gets really irate at people saying PO-tash instead of pot-ash …

    I mean where did these people learn English ?

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  34. watching

    Hank Paulson needs to be named head of the Dept of Agriculture so that he can start making death threats in defence of ag stuff. It all seems to have stopping being uppity. I can’t imagine a world with POT under 200.

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  35. patrick

    I work in right outside of Oakland, and some poor lady was arguing about the price of her Jack in the Box while talking on an iPhone.

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  36. HC

    why does everyone love FXP so much? the FXI chart looks great to me.

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  37. yikes

    Sell premium on a stock that moves 10 points in a day? No thanks. That’s like selling insurance to drunk drivers. A position can move against you no matter how you trade it.

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  38. Woodshedder

    HC, its not about love. Its about markets moving from overbought to oversold, over and over again. Right now, FXP looks tasty here because it is very oversold. This is a trade you might spend 3-7 days in.

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  39. Dan-O

    Greg, I have come to the conclusion that some dumbass on-air editor (Charlie “Greasy Forehead” Gasparino perhaps) has made a numbnut decision to avoid even passing drug referances on their program.

    It sounds laughable but I worked in that industry, it’s the kind of idiocy that permeates the ranks of management.

    Fucking Sheeple.

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  40. BOOMER

    no name change. is someone using my email addy now?

    i don’t “download” like the unwashed music buyers of the world. my iPod “managed” by a team of uber hipsters who feed me fresh sounds daily. all genres, only the best. none of this searching and paying and downloading.

    by the way, listen to me intently, iTunes will soon be under such a competitive tidal wave…you cannot comprehend it. mark this down: two majors are merging. they are pulling all content from all channels and selling direct at low prices and drm free. without the intermediary.

    you will see me in lights, but you will not know it is me, BOOMER. You will only think: that guy is cool. I wish I had that job. Then you will know. It is me, BOOMER.

    No internets imposter can touch that.

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  41. CubsRock

    SMN is going to pop $32 I think!

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  42. alphadawgg

    Bought FXP at 64.25. Playing the bounce.

    I still think your ass will get wok fried and melted if you bet against China long term.

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  43. kurt

    i dunno who taught you to trade but fxp looks like shit and stocks can spend months in “overbought” conditions

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  44. alphadawgg

    Cubs,
    SMN needs to get to $33 for any kind of meaningful reversal in the trend.

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  45. Dan-O

    FXP broke my balls last time it went through support (April 1st).

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  46. alphadawgg

    Kurt
    FXP does look like shit, but it’s oversold today. Trend is down. This trade is for S&G’s using weak, worthless dollars.

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  47. CubsRock

    Yeah I don’t think $33 will happen. I have my sell order in at $32.45. Hopefully tomorrow morning 🙁

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  48. kurt

    wtf when did it become ok to trade technicals on an inverse etf no wonder you people lose money.

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  49. kurt

    alphadawgg: shits and giggles okay

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  50. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    Death has come for LNN.

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  51. BOOMER

    Does FXP have any liquidation covenants… like that DCR pos?

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  52. gappingandyapping
    gappingandyapping

    Everyone is off to the races. Fucking idiots.

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  53. newequity

    added to FXP, cost basis now 67’50.

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  54. Woodshedder

    Kurt, I tested a system using only inverse etfs, buying only when RSI(2) is lower than 10 and selling when RSI(2) rises above 80.

    It returned 25% up to yesterday with about a 77% win rate.

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  55. mdawsz

    Wow, look at FXP go!

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  56. Granpa

    Shed,
    How does DUG look in that System? Doesn’t it rank in the over done and do for a bounce? If it can stay above 30.10 I think it’s got a chance for a couple of bucks.

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  57. SatanicChihuahua
    SatanicChihuahua

    The Chinese market is down 50% from its high six months ago. I posted twice a few weeks ago that the Chinese government was under political pressure to support their equity market. They finally took modest steps yesterday to do so. The impact is more psychological than financial, but it seems to have been viewed postively.

    Why is it a good idea to be short them?

    I don’t understand. Help.

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  58. ADB

    FXP? Geez, guys, 8 billion Chinese all saying “nice dip” while their government is telling them “here’s the bottom, right here”. You figure it needs to make sense?

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  59. Gregory

    kurt is right … ANAD is a rocket on fire and we are all reminiscing about the glory days when FXP was THE trade of the week.

    We all need to get over it, and acknowledge … Chinese mom and pop traders are gonna bust these stocks to 52 week highs again ..

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  60. Woodshedder

    Granpa, I didn’t test DUG.

    Pull up a chart and set the RSI to a 2 period. Then look at the reading. If it is 5 or below, it due for a bounce. It is a good system, but not perfect, as sometimes there are situations that can keep issues overbought/oversold for days at a time. Oil, for one, has stayed overbought for days.

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  61. Woodshedder

    ADP and Gregory- Buying oversold index etfs is a money trade. Don’t like it, then don’t trade that way. Just because you’re in love with China doesn’t mean FXI won’t pull back for a day or three.

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  62. idealxcynic

    man, FXP looks broken to me, it’s US components broke their downtrends and are heading up… I think the ETF will be dead for a while, at least until after the Olympics…

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  63. Woodshedder

    TO ALL TRADERS COMMENTING ON FXP:

    For me, should I take the trade, it is trade lasting 2-7 days.

    I’m not betting on its component stocks to resume their downtrends!!! I’m betting that there will be a pullback as the FXI is overbought!

    Its really very simple. A mean-reverting strategy if you will.

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  64. Granpa

    Shed,
    Does it work equally well in all time frames?

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  65. Woodshedder

    Granpa, I can tell you that it will not work well in a market that is in a long and severe up or down trend. Very well works in a sideways market, or a market that is trending, but is within a range.

    I will be testing it over much longer time frames and adding some optimization over the next few weeks.

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