So, after today’s miserable tape, coupled with NTRI‘s cardiac arrest trading in the AH’s, I decided to eat amongst the poor and destitute. In other words, I took $100 out of my wallet and went to Outback Steakhouse.
Normally, I’d rather be found dead outside of Palm, than alive inside an Outback. However, I was feeling kind of proletariat, considering the market had been executed by a few “sub-prime lenders.”
After arriving at this jerk off steakhouse, the fuckers seated me near the bathroom. Being irritated, I decided to ignore my “shit filled” surroundings and focus on the “cuisine.” After all, I was with my family.
The waitress came over and took my order. I ordered some seared Ahi tuna for an appetizer, and a fucking rib eye steak for my entree.
To my surprise, the seared tuna wasn’t half bad, despite the bullshit sauces that came with it.
So, I’m sitting there, sipping on my coke, waiting for my God damned rib eye. In the meantime, my kids are going banana’s, throwing crayons at the fuckers next to me.
To make a long story short, those asshats served me a well done rib eye. I had asked for it to be cooked medium rare. How else should steak be cooked?
I told the manager: “I’d rather eat microwaved meat loaf, than battle this fucker into my stomach.” (true story)
He graciously accepted my crude behavior and told me he’d send over a properly cooked rib eye, to my table– in short order.
Well, you know how the story ends.
I sat in a filthy booth and waited for another 45 motherfucking minutes, while my kids were busy throwing their shoes around the table, for a flimsy, poorly cooked, 1 inch rib eye. Can you believe it? 1 inch.
As you know, “The Fly” was not pleased with this rib eye and made sure the manager was well aware of his inadequate “cuisine.” Trust me, I’m fucked up like that.
Needless to say, I left a paltry 12% tip.
Those guys fucking suck goat balls.
NOTE: Sucking goat balls is worse than moose balls.
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