My Charts Are Cooler Than Yours

Hey, good news for the bulls. Charlie Gasparino has reinitiated rumor coverage on [[ABK]] and [[MBI]] today, saying “the bond market says they need capital.”

Keep in mind, he is not relaying tips or reliable information. He’s simply rumor mongering.

Good news, indeed.

Regarding the market:

Technology is leading the way up, with gains in [[AAPL]], [[RIMM]], [[GME]], [[INTC]] and other Godly names.

On the other hand, most of the banks are behaving rather ungodly, as smart money runs from [[GS]], [[LEH]] and [[MS]].

At the end of the day, “The Fly” is perfectly willing to see ‘tards trade technical breakouts, while sharpening his knife for an early killing in May.

Fuck CNBC UPDATE: Immediately following a question asked of Bernanke regarding how today’s circumstances compares to the Great Depression, they cut to a commercial.

Assholes.

Okay, maybe the planet isn’t going to explode, just [[LEH]]. Exports are still being shoveled out at a record pace, thanks to the weak dollar. Unemployment is not that bad. And, [[WMT]] is a taking a pickax to [[TGT]].

However, in order for the market to rip higher, in my opinion, the commodity bubble must be popped. You cannot have a bull market, when oil is above $110.

Sorry, I will not allow it.

Right now, semi’s are melting up, led by [[INTC]]. I will not try to explain why. It just is.

Banks are lukewarm to down. The dollar is being urinated on by the yen. And, [[TSCM]] is ripping.

That pretty much sums up today’s market.

See you later, fuckfaces.

They are partially financing the private equity firms, who have agreed to buy Citi’s 12 billion dollar crapfolio. And, they will eat the first 20% loss.

In other words, they are paying others to buy their paper.

ROFL.

Come now. Go buy the banks. I dare you.

Hat tip: Mish

NOTE: Mr. Mortgage (the youtube guy) has a blog.  

Long Jupiter.

Developing…

NOTE: Aside from Adam, all you other bloggers on this site are lazy cow-fuckers.

Disclosure: Short [[TSCM]]

Hat tip: Option Addict 

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWFC2PEbwCk 450 300]

Let’s see who’s right, shall we?

You and your sub 100 IQ or “The Fly’s” market mastery and 155 IQ.

You know as well as I, today was a horrendous day for the market, which was masked by strength in oil and [[BA]].

At this point, I have my cards. I am playing my hand with the temerity of a hungry mountain lion, inside Bob Pasani’s house.

My top holdings include: [[SMN]], [[SRS]], [[SKF]], [[FXP]] short [[FED]], short [[DSL]], short [[LEH]], short [[TSCM]], short [[MON]], short [[WM]] and long [[DGP]].

Now, I’ll just sit here, patiently, waiting for recessionary eps reports to come rolling in.

Say what you want about valuations. Inflation will kill this market faster than a flamboyantly gay goat in a conservative Iranian goat village.

Hey assholes, oil is at $112. Natty is above $10. Price inflation of rice is causing riots in Egypt.

It’s the end of times friend. And there you are buying stocks because of a fucking “technical breakout.”

Sometimes, extraordinary events demand that you get your fucking heads out of the text books and look around.

Is it really that bad?

Answer: Ask Bernanke.

Now, if you believe the greatest credit meltdown in 100 years warrants a modest 5% decline, year to date, you deserve to work for me, tending to my garden and cleaning my patio—instead of managing money in the market.

I do not fear the market going up. I have 100% conviction in my position that I am willing to endure painful short term losses, in return for bountiful long term gains.

Right now, with my money, I like short [[FED]], short [[DSL]], short [[WM]], short [[LEH]], short [[MS]] and short [[MON]]—just for fun.

Oh, and with Cramer mucking up his picks on a daily basis, I am uber confident that [[TSCM]] will trade significantly to the downside.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nxWeaevzc9o 450 300]

When the market was knifing lower 200-300 points daily, it scared people. Newspaper men started to write stories; and people from the government became opportunistic. So, the bears changed the approach.

Death by a thousand cuts, instead of the “sword of gay death.”

Notice, all of the “party stocks,” like [[AAPL]], [[RIMM]] and [[GME]], remain chockfull, while other stuff falls by the wayside, namely the bastards from [[LEH]].

If any of you leeches have been reading my poetry for more than 6 months, you know “The Fly” was always bullish. Gee, he’d run outside, following consumption of 4 cans of Monster Energy soda, and kick old men down stairs, or idle manholes—just to celebrate his long positions.

He was the “perma-bull” variety, until everything changed.

What changed?

It is a very long story and I do not care to bore you with the details. Just know, the stench from Wall Street, with all of its greed and folly became too much for “The Fly” aka Senor Tropicana. He read of massive errors being made at trading desks, coupled with “homo-hammered” retail sales.

He saw how stupid the internet trading community was, with all of their disgusting charts and loathsome market commentary.

So, he made a market call. One that was meant to last the entire year of 2008, not a few measly months.

The call was and is, as you know, to bet against the coked out guy on CNBC, talking gibberish. To bet against former Forbes magazine editors, who like to see equities trade higher, even in their nightmares.

In short, fuck stocks for all of 2008. “The Fly” will win, because God designed him that way.

Top pick: Short [[LEH]]

Death to the trannies!

May all trucking companies and truck drivers be hit with egregious revenue loss and “fuckfaced” speed bumps.

God willing, of course.