iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,443 Blog Posts

Won’t You Kindly Read This?

There is nothing worse than having a nice lunch, sitting adjacent to some fucking moron who curses like a truck driver, throughout the entire meal. One of the biggest set-backs of living in NY, in my opinion, is having to deal with the unwashed, uncivilized, garbage men and women who populate this filthy city. I just about had enough of NYC and will be moving the family down south, at my earliest convenience.

While down south, I will behave in such a way that I always imagined a southern gentleman should act. I will act super nice to all of my neighbors, as well as strangers. I will even offer fresh glasses of lemonade to anyone who asks me a question. I will grow a large mustache and twist it up real nice and walk around in a white suit, blessed with blue pinstripes. My favorite foods will be smoked and I will enter and win BBQ contests, maybe even a chili contest when I am “really southern.” The truth of the matter is, “The Fly” is sick of the big stupid city. It has too many degenerate perverts in it. I’ll be damned if I raise my daughter around these imbeciles.

In other news, the market is going higher. As you might have noticed, I have a new edge when investing. I only buy stocks that go up now. In the past, I handicapped some of you retards, by losing a little bit. You know, I sort of allowed you to catch up, even the playing field a bit, by picking the occasional loser. However, I’m done with that game and have decided to only buy stocks that go up.Inside of The PPT, I have set ups for days, using our proprietary algorithms to search for breakouts. Just so you know, DMND was selected from my Window Dressing screen, at the very top of the list, indeud. Some other names on that list include WRLD, TTWO, PRAA, PFCB and CSTR.

My top picks, going into the weekend, are the same ones I posted here yesterday. So quit being so fucking lazy and read my prior posts.

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93 comments

  1. @sswipe

    do you ever pick any etfs? 30 day holding restrictions due to employment make me hesitate to get into PPT. Abuse me.

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  2. SpeeroTheKid

    If you hate that – don’t come to Dallas. Love my city – but people won’t even give you directions down here. Not to mention you might get shot if the Cowboys are playing bad, which is a comedy in itself.

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  3. Subcomandante Braveflaps

    Have banjoooooo will travel is the calllll of a maaaaan.

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  4. StocksRider

    Fly, careful. Vampires and shape shifters reside in south too. Ask HBO.

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  5. TraderCaddy

    Is it my imagination but are the gold traders standing around in a circle jerk today passing orders between themselves, but being sure to take their two hour lunch?

    And if Fly moves far enough South you can have your own lemon tree and make fresh lemonade every day.Plus you can wake up in the AM in the spring to the smell of orange blossoms instead of the stench of piled up garbage near the curb.

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    • teapotdome

      as a so called member of the gold trading community I must inform you that we are too busy engraving our image into gold coins that your grand children will need to work their entire life just to own. we have no time for said circle jerk.

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      • Blind Read Ant

        A couple numismatic Long Islanders recommend either American Gold (1/12th oz. “blends”) or 1960’s pre-silver (for high-silver content “at discount”) as contending “survival-purchase-money” if an apotholiptic end of the American Empire. Can you opine? Suggestions welcomed.

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    • Jakegint

      As long as you steer clear of the gators.

      _____

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  6. MOOBER

    You know you want to live in Nashville.

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  7. Bullish

    When I have visited NYC, I always thought…. How the hell does anyone live here? Too many people, too much of everything.

    You know how far your money will go elsewhere? You can build a McMansion for a fifth the cost.

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  8. Treepart

    I generally refrain from speech during digestion. There are those who attempt both at the same time. I find it coarse and vulgar.

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  9. TheV.King

    Chuck and I will miss you…

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    • Bullish

      V.King, maybe you should do a top ten places The Fly is likely to relocate to.

      But you might get banned for that.

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  10. Subcomandante Braveflaps

    It’s on, at last:

    http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/summit/thebeaver/

    I smell Oscar.

    No, wait – it’s something else…

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  11. whitemanstan

    “I will act super nice to all of my neighbors, as well as strangers.”

    Imagine how phucking phreaked those neighbors will get when Le Fly’s inner Dr. Hyde comes out suddenly one day and throws trash on their lawns!!

    Then, Le Fly will immediately book it back to NYC and all the cussing a_holes in his fav restaurants, and he will loudly proclaim his love of NYC, and how, “if you can make it here, you can make it ANYWHERE!!”

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  12. tbird2252

    Fly, I live in Charleston SC. I am American by birth and Southern By the Grace of God!!! Want you to know we welcome you with open arms and will enjoy you living amongst us…However, if you bring that nasty habit of cursing every other word, there will be no mint juleps for you and someone may wash your mouth out with ivory soap!!!

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  13. CommonGardenSlug

    Try living in Toronto. We combine the politeness of the rest of Canada with the dickishness of big cities. You end up with this sort of passive-agressive stance where we resent the fact that you cut us off but we won’t let you know in your face. I try to buck the trend by being both exceedingly polite or mean to those who deserve it.

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  14. Octopus with a top hat
    Octopus with a top hat

    Fly, come to Canada

    we are much more civilized than you barbarians

    though not to Vancouver because they will seize and sell your car for speeding

    Exquisite, I say

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  15. SteveTheNeighbor

    Good deal Neighbor Fly. Mrs. Steve, Steve, Jr., and myself are ready to move with you on a moments notice. May I suggest the condos at Century Village in South Florida? Much to do there. They have shuffleboard, bridge, exercise class with Richard Simmons, ballroom dancing, and mahjong. I know you would dominate in bocce ball. Plus I hear the shows with stars like Jackie Mason are great.

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    • Hammer

      Not to mention the shuttle bus to take you over to the Mall and Piccadilly Cafeteria.

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      • SteveTheNeighbor

        Yes. The early bird specials at the Piccadilly. With a coupon and if you get to the Cafeteria before 4PM it is all you can eat for $4.99 plus a drink. Mrs. Fly and Mrs Steve can bring big purses and we can eat leftovers for the next three days. Pretty exciting.

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  16. chris

    Don’t bother with Atlanta. A-holes from California, Illinois and NJ have pretty much ruined that city. Picked my family up and moved to Nashville. It’s what Atlanta was 20 years ago and beyond. You really want southern hospitality try Mobile, Alabama or Jackson, Mississippi. Charleston, S.C. is damn nice too.

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    • Jakegint

      Greenville blows Charleston out the door.

      If you want a nice place to raise your family in South Carolina, Greenville is — by far– the best.

      Charleston is way too touristy, unless you are doing Seabrook or something, but that might be higher cotton than even Le Magistrate is looking for.

      _________

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  17. Le Fly

    I do not curse much in person. I like mint juleps. I am targeting NC

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    • muktukchuck

      Edenton NC or the Outer Banks.

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      • Jakegint

        Outer banks are great, but nothing going on there outside the season. Love Corrolla, though, w. the ponies, etc.

        JakeGint relocations has him focusing on the Triangle, although I PROMISE YOU, Greenville is better.

        _________

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    • go2mars

      I’ve got family near Mars Hill and Boone. I highly recommend checking out both. If you do go NC consider being up in the Appalachians. Not too hot in the summer, not too cold in the winter. Hiking for you and the kids, safety from hurricanes and tidal waves.

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  18. Le Fly

    I do not curse much in person. I like mint juleps. I am targeting NC

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    • Hammer

      The Biltmore Mansion in Asheville…nothing else will do.

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      • TraderCaddy

        Pinehurst, NC.
        Live on Number two and get a job there as a ranger.
        You can yell at people to play faster and if they don’t you can wing them with your course approved weapons.

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      • go2mars

        I went on a tour of that place last summer. Was that ever amazing! Looked just like my guest house!

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  19. The Zombie

    @CommonGardenSlug: HA! Hilarious!

    The Fly is God.

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  20. Fabian

    I had the pleasure of hunting and, then partying with Cajuns [in S. Dak] two of the last three years and have never met more friendly, generous, and fun loving people than they.
    Hard to understand em but what great folks.
    Not saying you could or would ever want to blend in Louisiana Cajun country though Fly.
    New York, S. Cal. attitudes like from outer space to these folks and vice versa.
    Your idea of getting your kids [and you] to somewhere amenable down South…go for it, great idea and the sooner the better as those kids they do grow up quick.

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  21. Bo Beach

    Come to metro Detroit. Nothing says monotony like midwest living!

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  22. YaBollox

    Where were you eating? Could you kindly ask the moron to refrain from the cursing? I have sat in my city’s nicest steakhouse and had a loud, boring, drunk guy at the next table. I think something needs to be said.

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  23. jimmie

    “at my earliest convenience”

    rofl

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  24. xxxHuggieBearxxx

    wow market is dead enough to be sunday already

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  25. Quint

    The Fly will come running back to the North as soon as he tries to order a bagel, or some I-talian food…

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    • Jakegint

      Not true. Ricky Pertina (sic) has his own restaurant down here.

      Good enough for Ricky Pertina (sic), it’s good enough for a half-Eyetal.

      Whattaya think, Eyetalians don’t move South for the weather? I was just in Wilmington, NC — which is not a big city, as NC, goes. Most recent two restaurants were opened by metro New Yawkahs.

      They are brazen about it, too — the one guy named his place “The Long Island Deli” or something to that effect.

      _____

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    • Belly of the Beast
      Belly of the Beast

      All they got is ketchup on noodles !!!!

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  26. drummerboy

    hay,i used to drive a fucking truck,and i dont give a fuck what you say about the fucking cocksuckers that fucking swear too fuckin much,you fuckin hear. i dont want to raise “my daughter” in a filthy city like this, fucking coward. dont come to mother fucking chicago,shit,i had to raise three daughters in the this fucked up fucking city.and they turned out fucking hot. fuckin A……………i know,I’M FUCKING BANNED

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    • Jakegint

      Pretty funny. Whenever my Dad caught me cursing as a kid, he’d look appalled, and say “What do you want people to think? That you drive a truck or something??”

      ________

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  27. theedge111

    Fly

    I am surprised. I would think somoeone with your pedigree wouldn’t be caught dead eating lunch with the common folk.

    Filet Mignon with a nice red at a private club would have been my guess:)

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    • drummerboy

      pedigree my ass,he was at the hot dog stand,with the rest of the drivers

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    • Jakegint

      That’s the problem with Noo Yawk… the scumbags are inside the private clubs now, too. The refined gentlemen have gone the way of all flesh.

      Or to Darien.

      _________

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  28. alphadawgg

    I like NC….cities, seashore, mountains, forests and sweet-talking ladies.

    Please don’t ever consider coming out West to the Rockies. We shoot NYC-types on sight for trespassing—especially if they’re dressed in a white robe with top hat and cane in hand. Just a warning.

    However, if ribeyes, mashed potatoes and “Jack” are your staple, by all means visit.

    No mint julips here, sorry. I don’t think the bartenders even know how to spell “jewlip” [sic].

    I do like your plan on how to approach stocks in the coming weeks, as the market is playing right into our “wheelhouse” right now.

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    • Jakegint

      How did you get by when you first moved out there, with that abominable Southie accent?

      Met our athletic director’s wife the other day… she’s a Wyoming gal. Can’t beat people from Wyoming. Looker too, even citing that she’s a new grandma.

      ________

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      • Colonel Sander's nephew
        Colonel Sander's nephew

        Years ago, my college roommate lived “down south” for a summer. He said “dating” up north was more serious than being married down there. He also said they wouldn’t think of touching “drugs”, but had no problem at all with drinking magic mushroom cool aide; where they wouldn’t remember where they had been for the last 3 or 4 days.

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      • go2mars

        GILF.

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  29. Rand

    Come to Texas, many, many of the wealthy from up north do come to live here. Our state has some fine schools if you overlook texas a &m. We have mint julips waiting, sir. Come to texas to sit out on the veranda.

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    • Colonel Sander's nephew
      Colonel Sander's nephew

      My sister lived in Ft Worth for a few years. When visiting the Northeast, she commented that the people in the Northeast were ugly and dressed like slobs. (true) Perhaps NYC is an exception to that.

      Re: ^^^ the Fly’s post, on no other financial site could you possible find a post such as that.

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    • Po Pimp

      And no state income tax. Always a plus.

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  30. inandout

    Lmao Fly,
    you just stated most the reasons I moved down south. Degenerate perverts, imbeciles, and scumbags is half of NY. It’s a shit hole even though it’s nice for a lot of things night life, shopping , Wallstreet, and especially the food and Jersey is NY’s dumbster.
    I’m glad I grew up there and it makes me who I’m today and would not trade that experience for anything, but would not want my kids to grow up there.
    Yea it’s nicer and safer now then the 80′ and 90’s since Rudy added a shitload of NYPD so maybe it is not as tough ad it once was,but stills sucks to me and the majority character of people are still the same. .
    I really wouldn’t want to raise my kids there either especially If I had a daughter.

    Down south is where it is . The BBQ is good, people are nice, you breath clean air, and the cops change your tires for you if you have a flat .

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    • drummerboy

      the cops change your tires for you. wwhhat. geez,you must have 48 dd’s and wear a size 2 halter top in that warm southereen sun………no

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      • alphadawgg

        I know cops who will change her tires even if she only had 38DDs and baggy workout pants. ;=P

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        • drummerboy

          lol i know cops that will just take your money and not help, no matter how many dddddd”s they sport

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      • Belly of the Beast
        Belly of the Beast

        while sucking on a popsicle …….. The South is where they pull you over for a busted taillight before it’s even busted !

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  31. rookie

    NYC used to be the best place on earth until all the mid western kids with mom and pops bank accounts decided to make it their new home after the crime rate dropped in the late 90’s … douchebags galore.

    i sold my townhouse in the east village right before the bubble burst and bought a farm in the catskills. i suggest you do the same …

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    • drummerboy

      me and the other half were gonna do the exact same,now we are kicking ourselves. had our minds made up on a 45 acre farmette.i swear we were just talking about it yesterday and this morning.man the stuff i could grow.and a dream wood shop. please,i’m getting sick anymore just thinking about that road not taken.

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      • alphadawgg

        I did what you guys are talking about 15 years ago. I do not regret one day of moving out to “fly over” country. Best decision I made for my wife and kids.

        The kids grew up with acres of land to explore, dogs, cats, horses, pigs, a vegetable garden, cutting heads off chickens and shooting guns.

        What more can you ask for?

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  32. Mr. Cain Thaler

    Your other option is to move so far north that the insolent and weak simply can’t survive.

    Good luck house hunting.

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  33. Canuck G

    Wow, interesting conversation………………I visited Manhattan in September, and loved every minute. The rightful centre of the universe, a place of authenticity,civility, and staggering wealth.Most impressive is the Grandeur of public spaces; Grand Central Station,Central Park , Metropolitan Museum of Art, to name but a few……I didn’t find it dirty or notice any particularly degenerate people……….I don’t think they can afford Manhattan. I feel far safer in NYC than Toronto.

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    • Belly of the Beast
      Belly of the Beast

      NY is the shizzle. Fly must’ve been chomping on a hot dog on Minetta Lane and someone asked him if he wanted some splay poupon.

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  34. joseph

    Living in the city makes me an antsy S.O B., but living in the burbs makes me want to mouth hug a shotgun. What’s a man to do?

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  35. chuck bennett

    Fly
    you have a few options.

    1. move out to the mid west for some of that fine mid-west raising. which we know is always good. haha

    2. Move to singapore with bow tie gentleman. learn mandarian (pudung wou) and yiou children will indead take over the rest of the known world.

    regards

    chuck

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  36. A Monkey with the Union Army
    A Monkey with the Union Army

    Move South to get away from retards? Are you crazy Man! People in the South are genetically one notch below single cell animals, and theys just ignant.

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  37. Blind Read Ant

    M. LeFly: Please do NOT consider “southern” California or the Pacific region as, with current governing management, we may be attacked! 2020-2050: Hawaii, province of the “People’s Rep. of China” (I honored Pearl Harbor Day). Alaska, territory of Russia. All of the border state residents who don’t know about a 2010 propagandist movie called “Machete” – remember the Alamo. Post-1960’s federal intrusion Mission: regenerate degenerates. “Body Snatchers” (see: http://www.brusselsjournal.com/blog/7745 – for an expert’s explanation) are are among among us, and the laws infringe our God given liberty and right to call many of them what they are: Aliens.

    (Now off my political horse): DE, BHP and WYNN are my payments for speaking my mind.

    p.s. SONY (Son of New York) with father’s who have fought in every US war but for Iraq / Afghanistan (since that’s me).

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  38. danielsan

    hahahah. u think ur not one of the gutter trash moron new yorkers who curses like a truck driver. jk i love you

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