iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,456 Blog Posts

Ha, Ha, Ha, Back From the Fucking Sun, Ha, Ha, Ha

You motherfuckers have zero legal recourse that would hold me to “forgoing the usage of the devil’s language.” All day long, I’ve been doing donuts on the sun in my car made from pure dynamite. Now that the VXX is off my chest, I am free to swing my dick around, smacking people in the face with purpose. I am “The Chinese Lottery Guy (TCLG)” and I wear traditional garb and I will poke your eyes out with my fucking chopsticks. Just so you know, it’s not racism when it’s true.

I’m enjoying the luxuries of QE2 and look forward to future QE’s. Tomorrow we get the October jobs numbers and I pray to the devil himself that they are bad. Actually, I wish no one worked at all, so that we could enjoy even more QE2.

Tell your wife, kids, neighbors, barber, bus driver: GET THE FUCK INTO THE MARKET NOW, for it can’t go down. The ultimate stimulus package is upon us and we’re just getting started. Go borrow money from banks, credit cards, the mafia, whoever, then margin it up and toss it all into stocks. If Bill Gross thinks the dollar has 20% downside from here, then the market has 40% upside.

Indeud, indeud, in-fucking-deud.

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70 comments

  1. James

    If you sit on cash you will get POORER by the day as the dollar is destroyed by Bernanke. Anyone sitting on cash today is NOT simply “even”, his dollar-denominated net worth has actually fallen by 0.75% (i.e. he is 0.75% poorer today). Bernanke has given you responsible savers and cash-hoarders the big MIDDLE FINGER.

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  2. inandout

    lol Chinese lottery man ,Real happy to hear your free from VXX.
    Even selling a loser can be a big relief off you chest, I remember the feeling a few times .

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  3. hein

    i guess you should not have gone short?

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  4. TraderCaddy

    No more VXX.
    As Dr. King said: “Free at last; free at last; thank God Almighty we are free at last.”

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  5. hammer

    What SPF factor did you have on during your joy ride?

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    • The Fly

      i don’t need that shit.

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      • SteveTheNeighbor

        Not true. You remember the water park vacation we all took several years ago? Mrs. Fly was very very upset at you for not using the sunblock.

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  6. the hammer

    Why would you smack people in the face with a porpoise? Unless it’s your very own special porpoise.

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  7. alphadawgg

    “GET THE FUCK INTO THE MARKET NOW, for it can’t go down. The ultimate stimulus package is upon us and we’re just getting started. Go borrow money from banks, credit cards, the mafia, whoever, then margin it up and toss it all into stocks. If Bill Gross thinks the dollar has 20% downside from here, then the market has 40% upside.”

    ROFLMAO!

    Now that Bernanke is trying to make the market everyone’s ATM machine, I can picture a flock of swans (black, of course) pecking every single last hair off his beard.

    Great post. Classic Fly sarcasm!

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  8. TraderCaddy

    As gold climbs ABX goes the other way.
    Inside knowledge about something?

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  9. Bullish

    It’s so sad to see 4:00pm. I guess we have to wait till tomorrow to catch all the money falling from the sky. I will be building a large container shaped object tonight in order catch as much as possible tomorrow and forever thereafter.

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  10. Prospectus

    What could possibly cause stocks to fall? Jobs don’t matter anymore. Economic data don’t matter. Financial institutions have free money. No reason to distribute and raise cash. Profits and revenues don’t even matter, really.

    All that matters is that dollars are worth less today than they were yesterday. And QE: The Next Generation will see to that. The only thing that can stop this party is if the Chinese play hardball, but that’s a blue blazer event unlikely to happen anytime soon.

    Get drunk, buy stocks!!!!!!11

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  11. panamaorange

    Went from 50% to 100% short today.

    I have nothing more to say.
    Except, I’m calling the top to the market, and Doug Kass’s career.

    That guy has jumped the shark more times than Geraldo.

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  12. alphadawgg

    Truth be known, I sold out of my leveraged emerging market equity positions at the close. Still leveraged to gold, tech, energy and materials.

    Short the dollar and buying into a basket of commodity futures through a fund.

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  13. Manuelstop

    In-fucking-dowd. That’s the spirit boss.

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  14. TheArtist

    “On August 1, 1927 the DOW ended a string of 19 new high closes of 21 sessions. On July 5, 1929, the same run of 19 new highs of 21 trading days occurred. The latter was only two months before the Great Crash of 1929 started. The first run was the bait thrown out to lure the suckers out of their nests, & the second extracted what money was left in their wallets. Margins then were only 10% so it can be seen why the little guy managed to lose everything. Mr. Investor (I usually call him Joe sixpack, but they didn’t have six packs then) could buy 100 shares of $10 stock worth $1,000 for $100 deposited at his brokerage company. A 10% move either doubled his money or broke him.This is the same leverage you will find in commodity futures today.”

    enjoy

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  15. RaginCajun

    YES! THE FLY IS FUCKING BACK.

    Indued.

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  16. The Equalizer

    Ever since the morning bell, I’ve had visions of Kenny in a spaceborne Trans-Am with the top down and with Sammy Hagar cranked up, as in South Park’s “Major Boobage” tribute to “Heavy Metal”.

    Then The Fly comes out with “doing donuts on the sun in my car made from pure dynamite”…

    *VROOM!*

    Fucking good to have the fucking Fly back in top form, by executive order 12631.

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  17. drummerboy

    so,coming back from the sun, you must be sporting an angelo muzzullo/george hamilton tan,no.

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  18. C_Farley

    So you said you would give AEM a little more room, that was 5 bucks ago…..when are you going to call it quits and cover that thing?

    Your like 10,000 shares and 10 bucks underwater now???

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  19. Joey Bag O' QE2 Vouchers
    Joey Bag O' QE2 Vouchers

    Glad to see the Fly is back and badder than ever. Long live QE2, QE3, QE4, ….etc.

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  20. alphadawgg

    Tech is the one sector with companies that have the most cash on the balance sheets.

    Over 14% cash as a % of assets and low or no debt makes for a nice place to play.

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    • YaBollox

      Cash on the balance sheets is a good thing? What asset could be in a steeper decline?

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      • go2mars

        I’d rather see oil reserves on the balance sheets.

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      • heaterman

        Exactly. One of the things this (QE!!) will do is force those sitting on cash to move it off their balance sheets, whether said sheet is Joe homeowner or General Electric. The result is the same. Cash is not where on wants to be when egregious degradation on the currency is taking place. The Bearded One is liquefying the economy.

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  21. Quint

    How can anyone be concerned about a down market tomorrow due to the Jobs report…C’mon it would be a gift…a down Friday…you always buy that because Monday is just around the corner and we always open up at least 50, if not 150 points on Mondays. Please, I hope they say the employment rate hit 30% tomorrow…please.

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  22. TraderCaddy

    RIP Sparky Anderson and Bless You Boy

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrJDAnhgQ_M

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  23. Teahouse On The Tracks
    Teahouse On The Tracks

    Some OEW for those looking for a top > The daily recap:

    > With today’s market action Intermediate wave three has hit our initial target: the OEW 1222 pivot. This is the same pivot that stopped Major wave 5 of Primary wave I in April. Also, this pivot’s range, (1215-1229), provides a 1.618 fibonacci relationship between Intermediate wave three and Intermediate wave one. The hourly/daily RSI [is] the most overbought it has been since the middle (Intermediate wave three) of the last uptrend (Major wave 5) and the weekly RSI is quite overbought as well. It’s no time for traders to be complacent. The short term OEW charts will remain positive on Friday as long as SPX 1200 holds. To clear this pivot the SPX needs to reach 1230. <

    If 1230 is met the next pivot is 1240 … if 1200 is breached, it is likely that wave4 correction will be underway.

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    • Po Pimp

      If we go up from here, we can go up some more before going down. Or we could go down from here.

      Real useful shit.

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      • Teahouse On The Tracks
        Teahouse On The Tracks

        Watch and learn or try to use the PPT hybrid score if you dare …

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  24. Quint

    The USA is back baby…fuck the Brazil Bovespa at 73,000, fuck the Mexican IPC at 36,000, fuck the Hang Seng at 24,000, fuck the Turkey ISE30 at 90,000, fuck the South African FTSE at 28,000, fuck Poland’s WSE WIG at 47,000….the Bearded Clam is going to make the DJIA the first 120,000 point stock market index!!!!

    You heard it here first, you will make a 10-bagger (as opposed to teabagger) by leveraging up your trading account (at all time low rates of 1.0% at iBrokers), and nothing can stop us…we are back baby!

    USA, USA, USA!!!

    QE3, QE4, QE5 – whatever it takes.

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  25. RC

    Video of woody, chess, and I now that’s the real fly is back: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Op-4iqRCDV4

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  26. YaBollox

    The market is not going up. The dollar is going down so we get this optical illusion. The corporate assets are worth more $US because the $US is crumbling. But still, better to have stock certificates than $. The Clam, not unlike many corporate managements, thinks dilution is the answer.

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    • william wallace

      This just crossed the news wires. Bernanke announced that the dollar is being dropped as US currency and he is replacing it with leaves. Now every land owner is a Millionaire. Its the ultimate stimulus. Money does grow on trees in Bernankeland.

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      • Cascadian

        Landowners don’t get to keep their leaves! That would be something akin to Capitalism. Anybody with a rake can come get your leaves. They must share with the feeble on a one to one basis

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        • go2mars

          Except for those in power. Their campaign contributers can collect leaves from National Parks.

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      • moolahheaven

        hahahaha!!!!!!!!!!

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      • Yogi & Boo Boo

        If I shred my leaves, does that mean I have more even though they’re smaller?

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  27. NicTrades

    Umm you do remember that the last four jobs numbers the market has sold off, even when the numbers were alright?

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  28. wb

    Did you forget that banks aren’t lending money?

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    • Cascadian

      Bernanke prints up the money and gives it to the banks. Bank stocks are going nowhere….. what gives?

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    • william wallace

      Isn’t there already about a trillion in reserve that is not being circulated by the banks? All this does is devalue the dollar

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      • cebu sun

        Exactly. No velocity. Ben is nofriend of usa. He may owe allegiance to Manchuria possibly.

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  29. buylo

    OMG, but Scotty B. sais this am that all they’re gonna do is raise the costs of all materials until no one can afford them, ie, there is no demand, then the market will drop like oil did a while ago and wipe everyone out. OMG, you should have held on to the VXX! Wrong way Fly is back, again. OMG.

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  30. The Fly

    C Farley

    I posted here that I covered my AEM short a touch under $77.

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