iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,445 Blog Posts

Mysteries Are About to Be Revealed

There are illogical answers to just about everything. For example: why is oil going higher?

Answer: people need it.

Or, why was housing going up in 2006?

Answer: land banks.

If you trade for a living, it is your job to ignore misinformation and punish those who send it to you. Today’s biggest culprit of misinformation, by far, is CNBC. You should punish those fuckers, by way of throwing a chair through your television. Granted, I will still be watching CNBC, for the entertainment it gives me— watching them do silly shit on the teevee. Frankly, it’s like watching monkeys groom each other on the animal channel, only better. But you guys do not need entertainment. You need coin; so get fetch a chair.

Like the ruins of Puma Punku, you are not supposed to understand what the fuck is going on. When things get real sporty or stupid, I clam up, sans the beard, and make it a point to “do no harm.” As you are busy fucking goats and picking lillys from your fields of horse manure, “The Fly” is working real hard at not working at all. Do you understand me boy?

I have things to partake in, all to do with the arts of masterful money management. You all would like to see me hit grand slams every day and I appreciate your sentiments; I truly do. However, you must understand, there is no one on base right now, so fuck off and go eat an egg sandwich.

Good night.

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62 comments

  1. Mushroomz

    indeud

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  2. MDA

    I heard RC is bigger in person than his t-shirt modeling jobs.

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  3. Stan

    “…I clam up, sans the beard…” muahahaha – very funny!

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  4. J

    ..so fuck off and go eat an egg sandwich.

    I swear…. as I’m writing this I’m just eating the last bit of an egg and bacon sandwich. Egg over easy.

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  5. Bullish

    What’s your thoughts on the fact that uncle ben will be passing out invtations to his koolaid party tomorrow?

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    • No. 1

      Spiked with everclear and chopped fruit, it will be a wonder to behold. I’ll be spending a lot of time near the punchbowl, partaking in the frivolity. Granted, those in the corner wearing blue blazers scowling at the spectacle will provide some entertainment. I fully expect them to be the lushes of the party at some point.

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  6. Prospectus

    “There is no one on base now.”

    Sublime. Wisdom distilled to pure nectar. Don’t torpedo your batting averages by trying to hit a walk-off homer when there’s no upside to be had. Wait for your pitch.

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  7. Dayman

    Type “Sandwich” into google images and start scrolling through. Better than porn.

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  8. Vegastrader

    LMAO. My stomach hurts from laughing. Going to have my egg sandwich now.

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  9. eagle9

    why do you let that fucking chicken saleman cramer on your website? Oh sorry, I dont see his shit face today. LOL

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  10. Teahouse On The Tracks
    Teahouse On The Tracks

    OEW Recap for today:

    > Friday afternoon’s rally continued today as the market worked its way back to uptrend highs at SPX 1229. The recent pullback from SPX 1129 to 1107 can now be considered completed, and the next rally higher should be underway. OEW short term charts remain positive. FOMC meetings are historically volatile events, especially after the FED’s statement around 2:00. We split the two potential short term counts, posting one on the SPX hourly and the other on the DOW hourly. Both suggest higher prices as Intermediate wave three unfolds. The two counts only pertain to the short term wave structure. <

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  11. the oracle

    I’ll say it again, like I’ve said it before….It’s unbelievable there are monkeys like you out there watching the day to day antics of “the market”. C’mon FLY! You’ve been in this too long. Stop jerkin off! Take a vacation. Why are you patronizing these assfucks reading this shit. I’ll tune in again at the end of September after summers over. Get a life fucktards! Why are you dumbfucks trading in death valley when life will return in the months ahead? U shittards are trying to force trades and the only reason I can think why is that you have no life whatsoever! unfucking believable! I just left Kauai after diving for two days and hiking the Kalaua trail for three. That’s why we’re alive! Go enjoy the planet you live on and stop staring at your fucking computer screen until it’s actually worth a trade or two!!! dumbasses! shit!

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    • Deep Blue Braveflaps

      Go dive a trench you fucking dingbat.

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    • Purdy

      “monkeys Stop jerkin off patronizing assfucks shit Get a life fucktards! you dumbfucks U shittards you have no life whatsoever! unfucking dumbasses! shit!”

      I think we have a new record ….let’s here it for our very special boy.

      BTW, if you play in Kauai on daddy’s dime until the end of September, you’ll miss a 12% move.

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  12. GonzoTrader

    My fav is when they have Trader Vic on…… he says all kinds of crazy shit… I think just to fuck with the Fast Moneytards……LOL

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  13. GonzoTrader

    The next person to use TARD is a TARD

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    • Indie

      i suggest mongoloids as a replacement. great word. sounds perfect in any conversation.

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  14. StocksRider

    Latest post – thoughts on tomorrow and short term outlook – http://www.ibankcoin.com/peanut_gallery/index.php/2010/08/10/strategy-update/

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  15. baron kurtz

    how does throwing a chair through my television punish CNBC?

    And if one already lives in the White House, why the need for any vacation?

    Begs an ” illogical ” answer.

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  16. JuiceyFruit

    driving for hours against the rush of no traffic
    away from the sun flightless headless rush of the blood
    through the barbiturate woman epiphany-ridden with a hasty
    decisiveness
    like the gamechanging scalpel she’d removed from her husband’s throat hours earlier
    now roaring towards joining him she was on the razor’s edge,
    teetering on the brink of oblivion
    her nailpolish was chipped and her lipstick was smeared
    manic mascara needed to be reapplied but the mortician can take
    care of that. she’d lost too much face to put one back on.
    she stopped at the graveyard before she took her life.
    covetousness. her lips moved in silent prayer in the crisp
    autumn air.

    she blew her brains out with the twisted trace of a smile on her face.

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    • MOOBS

      Calvino?

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    • ruggyup

      You might rethink the amount of absinthe you are drinking. Hallucinations are a disturbing side effect.

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      • Indie

        this ain’t no side effect.. it IS the effect!

        absinthe is mega! it’s great for streaking and french kissing strangers. DOWNTOWN LONDON SOHO!!

        urgh god… the memories…

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  17. HuggieBear

    Very well said mcfly. I am attempting to do no damage as well. So far, so good. Today should be interesting.

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  18. arch

    thanks for running the market up yesterday ticktards …..gave me a chance to cost avg. my VXX…oh by the way thanks for throwing your wallets into the funnel…
    and now your bullshit accts.will be

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KRdaI3AXljw&feature=related

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  19. Mr. President

    Yahtzee!

    “U.S. productivity unexpectedly fell in the second quarter, the first drop in 18 months, amid slower output growth and an increase in labor costs.”

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    • Kreizi

      Hmm, how did increase in labor costs come about?

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      • The_Real_Hmmm

        It’s the result of productivity declining more than hourly compensation. Over the last four quarters, unit labor costs fell 2.8 percent as output per hour increased faster than hourly compensation.

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  20. TraderCaddy

    Lurch (on CNBC) speaks the truth.

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  21. YaBollox

    Mohammed al-Beareon says we are all fucked. Structural change needed, the Fed can’t do shit. Look for Bernanke to turn cheerleader today. We get a short term pop.

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  22. arch

    took all profits VXX @ 21.80

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  23. noodle

    remember me saying we’d pull back today?
    I dont even know how I knew

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    • Vegastrader

      How did you know? Did you use charts, EW, Crystal Ball, Inside info or just guessing?

      Where will we close today and what will happen tomorrow and why?

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    • Satanfeller Luciforgan
      Satanfeller Luciforgan

      The cat poop ended up on the outside of the litterbox. That’s the tell.

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  24. francesco

    everyday charts ( for who knows how to read them / volumes ) shows everytime market is in control of support and accumulation .

    today too .

    take care ..

    should market due to re-flate process till 2015 , it will .. money is free .. GS&SEC work togheter ( & it’s public ) .. do your maths..

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  25. Vegastrader

    AAPL held at 258.50. SMA50.

    That was also the market turn.

    Watch AAPL for clues.

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    • francesco

      sounds a lil exaggerated
      i usually watch 15/20 charts/futs for clues ..

      aapl is in but is not a trend setter , at all .. now at least ..

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  26. Trading_Nymph

    CNBC are reporters, like most Financial News. They see the market go up and they guess why, they see the market go down and they guess why. But that goes for the WSJ, FT, Bloomberg etc…..I really spend very little time reading them at all…..give me a ship report or a balance sheet…it will tell me a heck of a lot more…one exception…the Chinese Press…it’s not written by journalist…lol, it’s written by the government.

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  27. jimmie

    I just threw my egg sandwich ( organic cageless chicken layed eggs) at the television.

    That Keith Olberman commercial gets my blood boiling.

    Next time I see it I am going to get my nine iron out.

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    • YaBollox

      Blood boiling? Comeon, he’s there to illuminate you!

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    • Douche bag

      What is wrong with him????

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    • YaBollox

      Free range chickens are a myth. In the last week of the chicken’s life, they open a door to a small grassy area. But the traumatized chickens are too scared to go out there on the grass. They stay in that huge stinking chicken barn until it’s butcher time. If not so, chicken prices would be 3X what they are now.

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  28. TX Slave Trader

    Epic fuckin post.

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  29. Edgy goat

    I’ll have you know that I have a restraining order that prevents your blog followers from coming within 100 yds of my barn.

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  30. WSJC

    Looks like today it will be a post apocolyptic announcement from senor fly. I can’t wait for a brutal Bearded Clam bashing after the FOMC. Please don’t disapoint us Fly!

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  31. Marcelo

    Fly, It’s nice you mentioned Puma Punku, I’m Bolivian and did visit the site. I agree with your comparison to what is currently going on in the markets.

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  32. speculator

    How can you eat an egg sandwich with an over-easy egg? Doesn’t that shit run all over the place? It makes me think whoever said they were eating one that way was just lying to kiss the Fly’s ass.

    P.S. – This market blows dead bears.

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