The Market Needs Steve to be Fat

What a monstrous close, after the idiots on the NYSE gave us false hope with that mid-day rally. There is no way to sugar coat it. However, just know, it’s only one day. After all, we have “Skinny Steve” going for us, with his soon to be announced Godly earnings report at Apple Inc. [[AAPL]] .

I should have sold when the market bounced this afternoon, but I didn’t. No point in crying or shotting myself in the face with a howitzer over it. I can only figure out ways to make money tomorrow, not 2 hours ago.

Assholes.

On the bright side, all of today’s buys were executed near the lows of the day. So, if Mother Market is kind to Plutonium Petey, he’ll be blowing out of these commodity fuckers, with egregious gains, by the end of the week.

There are some bright spots in the market, like General Electric Company [[GE]] and Pfizer Inc. [[PFE]] . But who gives a fuck about them.

Right now, it’s all about the state of Steve Jobs and how many soy burgers that fucker has been eating, over the last quarter. God willing, Steve will appear to be quite the plumper, helping stocks rip off the fucking whigs of asshole short sellers, first thing tomorrow morning.

Poof. Your bullshit bear market rally is over.

-Merlin

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6npuEdett-E 450 300]

Let this be a lesson to you fuckers.

I have been buying 250 share lots of National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] and The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , like a hypnotized inflation hawk. While it’s true, inflation is virtually non existent, commodity stocks are still cheap. These fuckers will bounce all around, before dying—just like the dot coms, circa 2001.

My position in Citigroup Inc. [[C]] is sucking wind, but that’s okay. I am long from the 13’s and view it as a long term hold, sort of a proxy for the distressed banking system.

With reference to my top 10 positions, some of those positions are not very big, considering my cash position is around 28%. The only meaningful positions are The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] and [[UYG]] .

With regards to Apple Inc. [[AAPL]] :

Investors are thinking AAPL will RIMM itself to death tonight. However, I believe those people are idiots and do not realize the tenacity and nazi-like management skills of “Skinny Steve.” I’m holding my AAPL through earnings.

All in all, today’s pullback is healthy, providing the losses remain under 3%. I’m not a fucking perma-bull. I’m more like a temporary bull, with a keen interest in kicking old bearshitters down idle elevator shafts, while guzzling down a few liters of Monster Energy soda.

Top picks: National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] , The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , [[UYG]]

UPDATE: I bought 5,000 Arch Coal, Inc. [[ACI]] @ $25.32, 2,000 [[NOV]] @ $30.15 and 2,000 [[MOS]] @ $37.20

My plan was to do nothing today, thinking the market would be a snoozer. I was going to buy tomorrows dip, then sell on Friday. However, with the market swan diving here, unable to string together 2 consecutive green S&P days since late September, I may begin to nibble.

The problem with buying here is the volatility. The market can very easily dive another 300 points, before rallying. So, with stocks like National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] , The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] and Arch Coal, Inc. [[ACI]] , patience is key.

Ideally, I would love to nail the higher low on these stocks with a new flurry of Godly buys. However, that is not likely. Instead, I will leg into these stocks, buying 500 shares at a clip, until I am fat and content.

For some reason, people are flocking into treasuries again, sending yields lower. It’s the flight to quality trade taking its grip on Wall Streets neck. LIBOR has come down, which is terrific. But, there is still a lot of scared money out there, evidenced by the ridiculous yields in treasuries.

In closing, I have not done anything today. Should things continue to deteriorate, I may place some buy orders, towards the end of the session. In my opinion, this market should be bought on dips, not sold.

Wow, that old fucker Kirk Kerkorian got wiped the fuck out this year, losing more than 12 billion dollars in the stock market casino via Ford Motor Company [[F]] and MGM MIRAGE [[MGM]] . How egregious is that? The man is 91 years old and he is still playing the market—totally nonsensical.

The numbers out of Freeport-McMoRan Copper & Gold Inc. [[FCX]] sucked. Therefore, all of the copper players are trading off. The reality of lower copper prices is finally starting to hit home.

Post yesterday’s melt up, today is just one big let down. The air is slowly coming out of the market, as jerk offs with series 7 licenses take profits and/or begin to place short positions. On the other hand, at least the volatility has subsided, which is great for my fucking heart and brain.

Earnings season is upon us and it will not be pretty. However, with my money, I am pretty sure there is some milk left in this cow to drain. So, on dips, I will add to my National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] , The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , Arch Coal, Inc. [[ACI]] and [[UYG]] positions.

But, just know, I can turn on a fucking dime. Do not be surprised to see me buying [[FXP]] or [[SRS]] , for outrageous laughs and somber cries.

In short, go eat a sandwich.

1. Cash

2. National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.64: Buy)

3. [[UYG]] (PPT Technical Score: 1.65: Strong Sell)

4. The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.69: Buy)

5. [[TBT]] (PPT Technical Score: 1.70: Strong Sell)

6. Citigroup Inc. [[C]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 1.70: Strong Sell)

7. General Electric Company [[GE]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 2.24: Sell)

8. [[M]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.19: Buy)

9. Arch Coal, Inc. [[ACI]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.36: Buy)

10. The Procter & Gamble Company [[PG]] (PPT Hybrid Score: 3.51: Buy)

NOTE: PPT Hybrid Score is the combination of PPT Technical and Fundamental ranks. A score of 1-2 equals Strong Sell, 2-3 equals Sell, 3-4 equals Buy and 4-5 equals Strong Buy.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vHAvjaHtlMA&feature=related 450 300]

As I sit here, gloriously triumphant, in my white robe and leather sandals, one thing comes to mind: what shall I order Mrs. Fly to prepare for this evenings “dinner banquet”? Mind you, the “banquet” will only be attended by Mr. and Mrs. Fly and our three kids; nonetheless, it is a meeting of great minds with some minor egregious behavioral miscues (for some reason the little ones do not like the burning incense near the dinner table).

I’ll have you know, right now as a matter of fact, I sold nothing today. “The Fly” is into pushing the envelope, when things go his way. All of the bottom fishing done last week is paying immense dividends today. Today’s rally is entirely commodity based. For the most part, the banks and tech names took the day off, leaving names like The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] and National-Oilwell Varco, Inc. [[NOV]] to go open field running.

Unlike Friday, today’s rally stuck, as TED spreads and LIBOR rates shit the shower.

In short, I must admit, it is entirely fulfilling being me, as my brain is nearly 100x as powerful than the average money manager. “The Fly” is almost a mythical figure now, as you readily know. I realize the responsibility that has been entrusted in me by the stock Gods. And, if I may be so bold,  I do intend to offer multiple, and also various, coin banking methods, just as long as you (the reader) shut the fuck up and quit debunking my “Tim Knight is a retard” theory.

NOTE: Tonight, I will post my top 10 holdings.

In video, of course.