Without Respect, You Have Nothing

I didn’t have my daughter’s ears pierced when she was a baby because she wasn’t a toy to be decorated based upon my whims. I could never look at her in the face and willingly impose pain upon her for something she didn’t want or need, superficial nonsense. So I waited for her to age and ask for the earrings on her own. Two years ago, when she was 6, she got her ears pierced and was thrilled to do it. In my opinion, people who decorate their babies are vile animals.

I am not going to turn this story into a stock market lesson because it isn’t. This is a reminder about deportment and how to comport oneself when in the presence of others. If you want something, give something. If you can’t give something, make that person feel welcomed and accommodated.

My clients never leave me. Do you know why? It’s not because I make them money. They already have money. It’s because I treat them with respect by being straight forward, no bullshit. Also, it’s important to discern the difference between “being honest” and being a fucking dick. Just because you are thinking it doesn’t mean you should say it. There are ways to get your point across without insulting others.

Now yesterday I canceled out of the StockTwits QnA session because of feeling slighted about “website decor.” I’m afraid by doing so, I offended some people with my brazenness, which was construed as inappropriate. If I offended anyone, aside from the IT goon squad, I apologize. I just like things a certain way. It was not a very professional course of action on my behalf. However, it was funny as shit. Sometimes I can’t help myself.

Moving on, stocks are respecting the ferocious appetite of bulls, stabilizing, drifting higher. Both TDC and YELP are flat to up, so that makes me happy.

Wishful thinking.

Nevertheless, my two biggest positions, consisting more than 50% of my assets, are higher.

Okay, now this is getting a little pervasive. I like how they are trying to blame weakness on China; meanwhile, Asian markets had no problem lifting higher. This has much more to do with the asshattery of Europe than anything else. Their indexes are dropping 2% at a drop of a hat, making us as nervous as a cat on a hot tin roof.

Today GOOG and AAPL are getting the business. But our markets are holding up relatively well. Frankly, I’ve been sort of paralyzed by the volatility and have done very little but add to positions. I cannot and will not believe Spain is gonna tip the scales over and lead to a European collapse. We’ve been down this road before and I will not be tricked again.

Nevertheless, facts are facts and Spanish 10yr yields are at 6%. I will not get concerned until French yields start to shoot higher again. As of now French 10yr yields are still under 3%. Should they get above 3.5%, maybe just maybe, I will start to freak the fuck out a little.

Until then, I will be eating sandwiches at a frenetic pace.

With enormous regret, I report to you that I will NOT be hosting the StockTwits QnA this evening, despite wanting to a great deal.

It all started when they reserved a room for me, meant for peasants– something straight out of the “how to redesign your home to look famished and in squalor” handbook.

Here is the place they tried to confine me to, like a prisoner, hungry for scraps of meatloaf.

So, being the diplomatic gentleman that I am, I approached this subject with sterling honesty and candor.

All I bargained for was the minimal furnishings that any gentleman in my position should have in such a venue. I did not ask for a lavish throne room or anything like that. I only asked to be treated as a person with a dignified air and with the appropriate care and seasoned alacrity that any host is expected to perform under such important circumstances, such as this. This humble request for humanity through proper decorum was dismissed. This was the room decorum requested, which was denied by the StockTwits cognoscenti.

Negotiations went back and forth all night, until I was dispatched an outright repudiation by a member of the StockTwits IT goon squad (what a surprise).

After being admonished in such a public fashion, I had no choice but to take a more serious course of action. Any man in my position would do the same. I am sure if you were bedeviled by my predicament, you’d do worse!

Several text messages were exchanged, all along the same obnoxious vein, effectively treating yours truly as a second class citizen, a financial servant designed to sit in squalor answering questions tossed carelessly at me by ordinary misanthropes.

I furthered my discussions with a much greater belligerent tone, in closing.

So there you have it. I refuse to abdicate my responsibility as a gentleman of society, just so others may have a laugh or two at my expense, humiliating the readership of fine men and women here at iBankCoin. Once again, 10,000 apologies to everyone who was looking forward to the session. I will, however, be more than happy to answer your questions here.

I will be hosting a room inside of the luxurious StockTwits confines this evening at 10pm, Wall Street time aka “the only time that counts”. As always, proper attire is required (top hats and white gloves for the gentlemen, pastel colored dresses and umbrellas for the ladies). I will be there to ignore any questions that you might have, while stirring fresh milk into a mug filled with Earl Gray tea.

I look forward to seeing my allies present, as there is likely to be many enemies attempting to cross over my moat. Let’s light these fuckers on fire with BBQ coals!

I aded to my YELP positions due to boredom.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfefScAfD6g

The cool kids are back in control of the gym, chasing the nerds out, donning African masks, holding javelins.

This game is meant to be played by people who understand life, those who guzzle large amounts of Bordeaux while listening to some Maybach music. The market wasn’t invented for fucktards clad in burlap, shitting all over the grounds. We’re trading higher because that’s what we’re supposed to be doing.

How many times do you need to be reminded, the power elite has embedded themselves in this whole bailout mentality. No one fails and everyone gets to roam the halls and make out in the stairwell.

Commodity stocks are shooting higher. Fuck it, everything is shooting higher, as the shorts get pressed into the vise.

We’re not done going higher.

There’s no reason to believe we’re not heading back to new highs. Hell, that’s exactly where we are going, whether you like it or not.

As for me, I am positioned in true Space Alien Magician form, long at 107% of assets, in a variety of stuff appreciating ever so rapidly in value. I had to tell my clients to “shut the fuck up” the other day, as they too fell victim to the panic onslaught by the midgets professing apocalypse on CNBC.

Anyway, I have to get going now. It was nice of you to play this game with me. But you should know better by now. “The Fly” wins all the time, especially when it appears he has finally lost.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TGOeASz_Ljw

A FAZmobile was seen zipping down the street. Inside of it was a bearshitter, clad in a burlap hoodie and florescent orange velcro pants. This FAZmobile I speak of traveled at frightening speeds. Onlookers cowered as it “zipped” by.

Back on Wall Street, Benjamin Bernanke was fireside, smoking a blunt filled with Moroccan hashish, mumbling to himself “I’m gonna get those bitches.”

The FAZmobile headed towards Wall. The occupant fancied he’d crash his mobile into the building where Benjamin Bernanke resided, with designs of destroying The Bearded Clam and his army of printing presses.

As the FAZmobile approached, Ben stepped outside, gazing at the insanity on wheels that was the FAZmobile. From the skies a large object appeared. It descended upon Wall Street with such force, the ground trembled, tipping the FAZmobile over on its back.

Benjamin entered this object, which happened to be The Federal Reserve helicopter, flicking his blunt down below at the FAZmobile, which was paralyzed and stupid, drenched in its own gasoline. As the flames plumed into the NYC skyline, Ben smiled and said “I got you bitch.”

The end.

Fuck the “old economy.” The “new economy” is all about connecting to other people via inane web comments, text messages and Tweets. I like to “Instagram” my evening cups of Earl Gray tea, whilst figuring out how the government faked the lunar landing.

All of the HORSESHIT that you folks call “commodities” have been, umm, commoditized.

Shares of copper stocks are decidedly lower.

Shares of oil and gas stocks are decidedly lower.

Shares of gold and silver stocks have made Jakegint scarce ’round these parts.

On the other hand, 25 year old punk kids are getting “rich as fuck” via social media, selling their dot coms for billions–allowing them to build castles with real fucking catapults, surrounded by moats–guarded by teutonic knights. Life isn’t fair. I know. After all, if there is anyone more deserving of a moat or a fucking catapult, it is me. Unlike the retards from Facebook, “The Fly” would put those weapons to use, bombarding his neighbors like they were Berlin and I was Great Fucking Britain.

Here look at this:

Now look at this:

Those are custom indexes that I built inside of The PPT, for social networking and commodities. Month to date returns tell the story. No one gives a shit about Dr. Copper anymore. It’s all about disseminating real time information through eclectic mediums. Get it?

Unlike others who suck the balls of these social media dogs, I am here to tell you this is a fantastic bubble to take advantage of. I believe this may be the sector that can make people a lot of money, something we haven’t seen since the dot coms days. We’re just getting started.

Back in 1994, I was buying and researching early stage internet stocks, namely AMER. When I entered the business, I began to invest in dot com stocks with all of my life force. The only problem: it was 1997 and I was early. We all knew the internet was gonna be huge; but the volatility crushed so many people before they got started, in earnest. The same shit is gonna happen now. There will be MONSTER winnners; but the volatility will shake you to your fucking core, making you want to light your face on fire with BBQ coals.

If the world is still around in 3 years, you will look back on this period as the nascency of social media and regret not buying one or two YELP’s for the long term.

I didn’t blog today because I was busy all day holding the hands of cowards.

The market did exactly what I wanted it to do today, small melt up, nothing too pretentious. This sets up for the next phase of “OPERATION ROAST SHORTS” sublimely, where they step into the fold, thinking the coast is clear, only to get run over by a speeding tractor trailer (no roadrunner). All of my positions, save TDC and YELP, were higher today. But because YELP is so heavily weighted, I had an average day. The initiations are out of the way and YELP is free to trade wherever the caprices of overzealous speculators permits.

TDC is just a side effect of the carnage that has been transpiring inside of the commodity sector: pure horror on a biblical scale. I believe these companies are setting up nicely for new investment, as the weak hands flush out, firmer value oriented hands will grab and swallow these companies whole.

In the small scheme of things, today was shit. It’s just one drop of absurdity in an ocean of fuckery. I look forward to the slow boiling of shorts tomorrow, same Fly place, same Fly channel.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HOSuZxYRQE