iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,474 Blog Posts

SALT: PERMANENT BULLS CAN EAT A DICK

I will preface this bloggery with the fact that I was down 1.1% in trading and +2.2% in my Quant. I had hedges going into the Fed meeting and Powell speech (FUCK YOU, I AM NOT CALLING HIM JPOW) and never closed them out — maybe because I was on the phone with MOVERS for a fucking hour and had no idea what the market was doing. I can only assume I would’ve been tempted to close them out and rip long for the candles presented were only green and one way for quite some time intra-day. NEVERTHELESS, I want to address a few matters in regards to PERMANENT BULL FUCKED FACES and why they should be tossed into frozen tundras and left for dead.

THEY ARE CUNTS, offer zero insight or analysis and only are programmed like NPCs to like stocks. Granted, stocks have gone up for a long time — BUT THEY AREN’T ANYMORE so fuck off with the idle comments of “stocks only go up.” No they don’t and soon they will be RIPPED FROM CROWN TO ROOT and all of your gains will be transferred to me. Sure, I am salty and I suppose, one might say, I am envious of those who partook in gains today. But let’s not pretend the drunken man walking down the correct road is a sage. He is a god damned idiot and only enjoys spoils because of chance.

THIS IS HOW THE BALANCE OF THE YEAR WILL PLAY OUT.

Earnings will continue to come in LESS THAN STELLAR and GDP will print negative for the next two quarters until the Fed finally admits they can’t keep raising rates. Unemployment will rise to 10% and the war in Russia will be kinetic and nothing you see now will be worth anything. The idea of buying into a +900 point rally will become something of a laughable FARCE and all of the permanent bulls who relish about the idea of receiving “credit” for being right will be BURIED ALIVE in their DRIP positions and long TQQQ gambits.

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9 comments

  1. moneymindsoul7
    moneymindsoul7

    Bahaha, this is a brilliant piece.

    Dude you’re a fkn legend!

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  2. helicopter ben
    helicopter ben

    FiG

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  3. s.k.

    You were right yesterday though. You nailed this rally bro. You just talked yourself out of it.

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  4. juice

    GAP

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  5. richardweiner

    Stocks look like a hard cock sticking straight up. Soros wrote in his first book it is best to stay with a hard cock formation until climax and get out of the way once gravity takes over and the falling jizz action splatters back. But don’t exit before the jizz.

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  6. the_wolf

    836% ytd

    Energy remains bullish as fuck

    Oilman

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  7. roguewave

    Pelosi, fears for her life in the US capitol but has no problem galivanting in an active warzone to take pictures with Zelensky and personally delivering billions.

    Boris Johnson also did not pass on the photo opp openly walking around Kiev, no bulletproof vests, no secret locations. In fact, numerous leaders of NATO nations have visited Ukraine since the war began. The presidents of Lithuania, Latvia, Poland, and Estonia all traveled by train to visit the war-torn country.

    Odd, no?

    Everyone clearly knows where Zelensky is located – including the Russians. If Putin wanted to assassinate Zelensky, he would have done so already.

    https://www.armstrongeconomics.com/world-news/war/propaganda-from-a-warzone/

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  8. flea

    Nice piece dude. The bit about the drunk walking the right road is classic. Might have to steal that one day … Good luck to all!

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