iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
17,987 Blog Posts

Sadness Strikes at the Black Heart of Le Fly — the Streak Has Ended

My enemies are making scores of money in their SOXS positions, all at my expense. I am literally paying for them to laugh at me. Meanwhile, I just snapped my winning streak, like a cold, hard, pretzel, booting out of UCTT for a humiliating 10% loss. I had such high hopes when I bought UCTT. I envisioned myself out there in the woods and the winds, running freely amidst the gazelles — profiting from the hubris of others. Alas, it wasn’t meant to be. Instead, I sit here, downtrodden and sullen, sipping on lukewarm coffee, with tears streaming down my face (cue that music and shit below) onto the keyboard below.

God willing, said tears will cause an electric shock and put me out of my misery. What an ironic end it would be.

Meanwhile, I sold the BZUN earlier today — I am sure my enemies are getting into it now for the true move higher, as I am the Dennis Gartman of blogs — a curse and a insidious stain on trading turrets throughout the galaxy.

In addition to UCTT, I am getting face punched in BILI, ENPH, VALE, and even IQ. When does it end? Is it possible for profits to escape me once again? These questions, and more, shall be answered in a shocking Shakespearian revelation during next week’s blogs, in The Fuckery of Fly’s Life — starring George “The Animal” Hamilton.

Over on the quant side of my investments, she is up another 0.55% — mocking me. I feel as if my robotic mind is purposely trying to cajole me into punching it in its face. How is my robotic mind trading better than my actual mind? Is it, perhaps, due to a chemical imbalance that leads me to ruin?

Tune in next week for these answers.

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11 comments

  1. helicopter money
    helicopter money

    It’s all the meat.

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    • discoordinated
      discoordinated

      Meat is good for you, he is just early on the wave. Once he is back on top of the wave he will be descending on all our heads.

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  2. numbersgame

    I am not sure if your blog is more entertaining when you are “getting face punched” or during your “epic winships.” Either way, entertaining.

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  3. cancel19

    True story. Every time I have played $UCTT I’ve been sucker punched and never saw any titties!

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  4. moosh

    Fret not, Le Fly. Said tears full of creatine? Shit, the robotic overlords won’t know what hit them when this bud really blooms.

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  5. moosh

    Btw, luke warm coffee? Cold brew that shit all day long.

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  6. mushroomz

    Fly you might like the Arctic Monkeys new album and lyrics. Loungy space jazz. The second songs talks about driving around in a car listening to the score of some underrated documentary.

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    • moosh

      I dug it. Pianos are cool. Arctic monkeys should not do that again.

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  7. juice

    neither egregious profits nor humiliating losses can prevent the prose from flowing forth from Monsieur le Fly-meister like Lilies from the valley

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