iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,431 Blog Posts

Floridian Apocalypse Plays Pullback After Irma Fails to Impress

Talk about a dick headline. How about that one?

Mostly everyone expected Irma to knock down all of the skyscrapers in Miami, killing and maiming people all across the peninsula, all the way to Iowa. But since Irma ended up to be nothing less than a dud, those pro-apocalypse stocks are pulling back here. Perhaps a buying opp?

I think not.

LL -7%
USG -5%
PGTI -4%
KIRK -3%
Gold sector -2.2%
OC -4%
MLM -3.6%
TPX -3.6% — because people were going to need new fucking mattresses.

While I get the profit motive for many in my field, I can’t help but think most of you are evil people. I don’t mean that in a bad way, per se. It’s not like you’re heading out at night, like Jack the Ripper, and killing hookers. But you’re all just a bit off, lacking empathy, and entirely greedy. If there is a God, he will surely send you to hell upon reaching the gates of heaven.

Personally, I just want to raise the kids in the nice northeastern lifestyle, then head out west with my fortune to cavort amongst liberals in Santa Barbara or maybe Monterey. I don’t have an interest in moving to conservatard towns down south. More or less, they lack artistic talents and are dullards.

Prove me wrong.

If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter

11 comments

  1. aj

    is your proposed move to Santa Barbara due to the show?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  2. ferd

    After Jersey, Podunk KY would seem a cultural mecca.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  3. soupbone

    No need to move just add new hideouts and they needn’t be fancy. Colorado, New Mexico, maybe a wine producing area also.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  4. fryguy15

    Californians are some of the worst people in America. Colorado is legit. Still get the seasons and a lot of sunshine.

    • 1
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • Dr. Fly

      Colorado can eat a dick. I am not out to make friends. I have you anonymous assholes. I just want better weather.

      Miami is a crime ridden cesspool.

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  5. fryguy15

    I bet you can find some great deals in Miami right now.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  6. roundwego

    Santa Barbra is becoming trash. Go Carmel.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"