The market was boring, so I took my aging ass on a fucking walk throughout the genteel streets of Princeton. I was wearing a button down shit, admittedly a tad tight. I’m not fat by any stretch, weighing in at 160lbs, but the shirt was a little neat if you know what I mean. To accompany the shirt, I wore blue jeans and a pinkish hat that I bought in Newport, RI. My beard is grown in and I look like a disheveled hipster in search of crack cocaine — a regular jackass fool in layman’s terms.
I ventured off to the local record shoppe and purchased some old jazz records, an avocation of mine. After that, I went to the bookstore, passed over a 1st edition Hemingway (A Moveable Feast) and bought a book on philosophy. I figure philosophy is a good method to teach my young ones about life — aside from experiencing it.
Then I bought a fucking kale salad, because my new vegan life demanded it — along with an order of fries — otherwise I’d starve to death.
So I’m walking to my overpriced car and a gaggle of 12 year olds, cycling on the sidewalk at frantic speeds approached me, making weird siren sounds with their mouths. One of the red headed brats, looked in my general direction, but avoided eye contact, mouthed off and said ‘FASHION POLICE, WHAT SORT OF FUCKING HAT IS THAT?’
This demonstration of virility in our Princeton youth made my day. I tipped my hat to them and proceeded to jog on, both amused and proud that our future is being secured by a recalcitrant generation filled with prospectively violent thieves and robbers, ready to do battle with the Whores of Babylon wearing funny hats in DC.If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter