iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,417 Blog Posts

BAYER BIDS $62 BILLION, ALL CASH, FOR MONSANTO

Fuck the farmer, basically. Corporate culture is taking over the farms, in a big way. The lads over at the Bayer aspirin company want all of you bird seed mother llamas to fill out your TPS reports, in short order.

They’re bidding $62 billion for MON, or $122 per share, whether MON likes it or not.

Bayer has big plans for Monsanto, using their GMO technology for a sundry of pharmaceutical based products, eventually paving the way towards chimeras becoming an ordinary thing around town. Base ingredients injected into foam will transform ordinary humans into half beast animals, running about the town square eating cobbs of corn. You fuckers truly have no idea how deep this rabbit hole goes. House DuPont is now teamed up with Dow Chemical and Bayer with Monsanto.

Horribly beautiful things are in store for mankind. Sit back and enjoy the show.

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6 comments

  1. frog2

    $150 or fuck off

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  2. btn

    I’m not sure how that math works. $122 about a 20% premium on there current ~$101 share price. However, their current market cap is $44B, so a $62B offer is about a 40% premium.

    Shares outstanding is 436.8M.
    $62B/($122/share) = 508M shares

    More importantly, Bayer’s own presentation says that the merger would have 45% of industry sales (specific industry not specified, but I would guess agriculture in general).

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    • btn

      $62B = enterprise value, not market cap

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      • caerus

        those $62B with current shares out are more like $141.

        Seems that those Zombie movies will be reality in near future.

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  3. braveflaps

    If the result is that real jackelopes hop around the American West, it will be worth it.

    It will be yuuuuuuuuge.

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  4. evilmav2

    ‘I have seen the Devil in my microscope, and I have chained him… ‘

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=u8tVk61sHsQ

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