iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,426 Blog Posts

Here’s Why I’m Not Reporting on Buffett: Fuck Buffett

It wasn’t a natural inclination of mine to come out and blurt ‘fuck Buffett’. I’ve been listening to his interview with Becky Quick for what seems like the past 5 hours, and have agreed with much of what he’s said. But I didn’t want to talk about him or his stupid asshole friend, Charlie Munger, for reasons unbeknownst to me.

An old client of mine lives near Buffett and has told me some tales that have been repeated by lots of people who live in Omaha. Buffett, despite being the world’s richest man lives in the same old house he bought 200 years ago. He walks around town like a regular Joe, drinking soda pop. He eats at the local Denny’s and orders folksy food. The bullshit goes on and on.

Buffett, he’s such a nice guy, benevolently amassing tens of billions in personal net worth whilst eating bags of frenched fries and guzzling gallons of cherried coke.

This is an asshole of the very first magnitude.

There’s nothing worse than an asshole pretending to be a nice guy, licking icecream cones in public to look like the average Joe so people don’t want to beat you like a piñata.

Look at me–not a nice guy, complete asshole. But you don’t see me walking around town with a fucking hamburger in my face to blend in with the proletariat.

At this point in my life, I have nothing in common with Warren Buffett. His rhetoric has been repeated over and over again. It’s predictable rubbish from a man who’s a master of deception, skilled marketer of wholesome Midwest kitsch, financial genius disguised as a fucking coupon clipping ham and egger.

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15 comments

  1. bobbin4apples

    Buffett is the OLDEST hipster.

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  2. braveflaps

    His acolytes are the Children of the Corn.

    Hole.

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  3. Caffeinated

    Also appears not a politician, but is the ultimate manipulating politician.

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  4. infinitezuul

    “It’s predictable rubbish from a man who’s a master of deception, skilled marketer of wholesome Midwest kitsch, financial genius disguised as a fucking coupon clipping ham and egger.”

    This is a very good description.

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  5. dragun

    No one amasses a fortune like that without someone getting hooped,

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  6. cali24dog

    LOL – Bravo

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  7. UncleBuccs

    100%

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  8. Trent J

    I live in Omaha and see Warren from time to time. Just some random points some may or may not find interesting about Warren… He is tall and broad. At 85 he looks like he played in the NFL at some point 70 years ago. Much bigger than I am at 31 which is annoying. He is one of the few in Omaha that has a driver. Him and Walter Scott may be the only two that I am aware of. He gets a new Cadillac car once or twice per decade and it’s not anything high end. My Mercedes E Class was more expensive. He is always very polite and is happy to take pictures if you want one with him. About 5 years ago they added a security “shed” to his house. I doubt it was his idea. He enjoys going to Husker Athletic events as well as Omaha’s Lingerie Football league games. Last game I was at he was in front of me in line with another few people. He was eating a hotted dog and freched fries with a coke. He paid with a $20.

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  9. stries

    Hilarious. Made my day

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  10. frog

    Warren apparently identifies with the lower middle class psychologically. So that’s the way he lives his life. No reason for him to live high on the hog if that’s not what would make him comfortable.

    I’m sure I don’t know what all he did to get so rich, and maybe some of it was manipulative. But I can’t believe that his living low on the hog is manipulative. It’s all about comfort level.

    Like do you ever hang onto some threadbare shirt or cap or other worn out item of clothing, just because it’s comfortable and feels familiar, and you don’t care if it doesn’t look good any more. Maybe you only wear it hiking or gardening or something, not out in public. It’s like that, except he does it in public too. Maybe. Just guessing.

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  11. frog

    Conspicuous over-consumption does not make everyone happy. Each to their own preferences. We don’t all like the same stuff. And the world would be very boring and monotonous if we did.

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  12. jungleegirl

    conspicuous under-consumption. odd, no?

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    • frog

      Maybe. But the guy gives billions to charity. If that makes Uncle Warren feel better about himself than buying mansions and yachts and fine clothes does, there is certainly nothing wrong with that.

      The U.S., and the world could stand a few more billionaires who give billions to charity rather than spending it on hookers, cocaine etc.

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  13. bexpo

    I Couldn’t agree MORE!

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