Let’s keep this clean and to the point. Tim Cook is still gay and actively seeking a life partner, who may or may not relieve himself inside of the ladies bathroom. Okay? Aside from that, S. Jobs is fucking rolling over in his grave, haunting Tim at night, throwing candelabras at him –because of what he’s done to his baby.
Apple reported a very bad quarter, with both earnings and revenues coming in light. Margins were less than expected and iPhone and Mac sales were disappointing.
Additionally, the company issued downside guidance, with sharply lower margin guidance, indicative of a company struggling to maintain share. The board has authorized share buybacks to the tune of $175 billion.
Why not just toss said dollars into a flaming barrel of trash?
Via briefing
- Reports Q2 (Mar) earnings of $1.90 per share, $0.10 worse than the Capital IQ Consensus of $2.00; revenues fell 12.8% year/year to $50.56 bln vs the $51.98 bln Capital IQ Consensus; gross margins of 39.4% vs 39.6% ests vs 40.8% last year (guidance 39-40%).
- iPhones 51.2 mln vs 51.5 mln ests vs 61.2 mln last year.
- iPads 10.2 mln vs 9.9 mln ests vs 12.6 mln last year.
- Macs 4.0 mln vs 4.6 mln ests vs 4.5 mln last year.
- Co issues downside guidance for Q3, sees Q3 revs of $41-43 bln vs. $47.35 bln Capital IQ Consensus; gross margin 37.5-38.0% vs 39.2% ests vs 39.7% last year
- The Board has increased its share repurchase authorization to $175 billion from the $140 billion level announced last year. The Company also expects to continue to net-share-settle vesting restricted stock units.
- The Board has approved an increase of 10% to the Company’s quarterly dividend, and has declared a dividend of $0.57 per share, payable on May 12, 2016 to shareholders of record as of the close of business on May 9, 2016.
- 2.3% dividend yield at after hours price of $99/share.
The stock is lower by 7% in the after-hours, dragging with it a sundry of tech names, such as SWKS -4.0%, QRVO -3.9%. CRUS -3.0% (also reported its own earnings), AVGO -2.2%, NXPI-2.0%, QCOM -1.1%, INVN -0.9%, TXN -0.6%,
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Pardon my ignorance FLY. What movie is this?
http://ibankcoin.com/flyblog/files/2013/07/wendover.jpg
Barry Lyndon, Kubrick’s finest movie ever.
joyous day, unicorns are dying. and SQQQ is looking good.
Apple hasn’t innovated since the iPhone. On top of that I just went to the IR site to listen to call on drive home, won’t let me stream through my galaxy must dial in. Really, they just made 50 billion in 3 months and they can’t let me stream to my droid? Their isolationist policy is worse than Trump.
“Apple hasn’t innovated since the iPhone.”
This is what happens when you lose Jobs and decide dividends and buybacks are more important than R&D.
Agreud, if you’re in the C suite you want to get paid today not in 30 years. Thus financial engineering appeases the investors thus driving up your stock options. Jobs was trying to build something, not milk cash.
This is how the new financialized economy works. No more products are going to be made. Stock buybacks are the new R&D.
financial engineering appeases the (short-term) investors.
Nothing to worry about.
Steve Jobs always has the next amazing thing up the sleeve of his mock turtleneck.
remember what happened to apple the first time steve left? he seems to know when to leave the bagholder sculley and cook.
Barry Lyndon. I very great movie.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lzSoKOs1fc
Yes, but look at their new worldwide headquarters! Seems to happen every time. Company builds a new HQ and the company rolls over.
Hilarious post! May or may not use the ladies bathroom, throwing candelabras… can’t stop laughing.
I wonder how long it will take Mr. Cramer to bring back out his big bad checklist he was going to check off before going off the rails bulltard?
When Jobs died, everyone was talking sh*t about how he left the company with 20 years worth of innovative products in the pipe. Only thing going on there now is pipe smoking!
if apple cant make money in this market who can? jobs retired both tech booms before the top. tho this time i dont think there will be another resurrection of apple nor the tech industry for sometime.
Apple made >$50 billion. What do you make? What does any other company on earth make? Yeah, the glory days may be in peril but making money is not a problem for AAPL.
What?
More good news for Apple:
“The FBI has provisionally decided not to share an iPhone unlocking mechanism used by a contractor to open the phone of one of the San Bernardino shooters”
So everyone know that the iPhone has a security weakness and that Apple does not know how to fix it (at least for some of the older phones).
Yeah, yeah, and if AAPL is at 97 or lower in the morning I’ll add to my position.
how much will you add when it is 20 in sept.
If it goes to 20 it would constitute 100% of my portfolio.
Although if AAPL was at $20 in Spetember, then something tells me MREs may be a better investment.
In the short term, markets are ruled by emotions. The news will be blaring miss this to the masses. If Amazon and FB don’t beat by significant margins, then I can’t see how the bull market continues.
Fix the fucking iStore and iTunes. Buy a real streaming music service. Acquire some growth. Damn, do I have to tell you everything, Tim Cook?
It would be really good if AAPL made it easier to buy content. Though I still buy music from iTunes, movies are easier on AMZN, books are easier on AMZN, and TV is easier on NFLX. This makes no sense when AAPL can easily throw billions at the problem.