Oust its CEO first. In spite of the non-negotiable facts that Starboard is making demands of a King while owning a peasants 0.75% position in YHOO, their plan has extreme merits.
Marissa Mayer is the worst CEO since Jack Dorsey. She basically reduced Yahoo to the fucking ashtray of the internet, buying up web-popsicle refugee companies and driving them further into the ground until all value had been lost. Hell, the entire worth of Yahoo is NEGATIVE after taking into account their gigantic step in shit that is the BABA stake. What is that thing worth now, 30,40, 60 billion dollars?
If we asked D. Trump to assess the situation at Yahoo, he’d say ‘they’re all losers who don’t know how to win. They don’t know how to win and it’s really a sad, sad thing. Someone should make Yahoo great again. Anyone could do a better job than Marissa Mayer. Even my son Barron, whose still a baby, could do better for the Yahoo shareholders.”
Yahoo could be a great company. They have fantastic assets that are being squandered. Needless to say, Starboard agrees and one day before good Friday, they’re taking the fucking knives out and firing catapult missiles into Mayer’s pretty little castle.
Activist hedge fund Starboard Value LP, which is leading an investor revolt against Yahoo Inc’s management team, is seeking to remove the entire board of the struggling Internet company, the Wall Street Journal reported.
The activist investor, which owns about 0.75 percent of Yahoo, plans to announce Thursday morning that it will nominate nine directors to Yahoo’s board, the Journal said, citing a Starboard letter.
“The board and management have continually failed to live up to their own promises and shouldn’t be trusted with the decision on whether Yahoo should remain an independent company,” the paper reported, citing the letter.
Carl Icahn usually asks for 3 board seats. These fuckers want 9, the entire company. I am certain Mayer will accept this letter, urinate on it, then go try on a new dress or something.
This press release by Starboard is designed to make inroads into ousting Marissa. Let’s see where the wind is blowing for her, east or west?
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Addendum: Starboard also wants to change Yahoo’s name to Portbeaver.com.
The name is available (I checked).
Well that didn’t last long….
‘Bout time.
3,6,9, damn girl fine
I’m voting with Starboard, because the current board is pretty much stupid beyond belief. I want a (ahem) Star Board!