Spy futs -5, Europe lower by 0.6%, oil -2%, gold -0.3%, dollar flat; FUCKED
Higher
Earnings nonsense: IDTI +9.5% (made a bullshit acquisition), BABA +8.5%, ASC +6.9%, EW +6%, SAVE +5.4%, AGEN +5.2%, CNC +5.1%, COH +4.9%, PCRX +4.8%, ROSG +4.4%, MGLN +4.2%, AGII +3.7%, BMY +3.6%, PAH +3.4%, ONE +3.2%, PFE +2.8%, UTHR +2.8%, YNDX +1.8%, MDSO +1.7%, CIGI +1.4%, MRK +1.2%, TXT +1.1%, BP +1.1%, .
Mergers and Executions: PRSN +166.6% (Some moron is buying this company), TRIV +55% (acquired for $9.10 by ELGX), RIVR +29.6% (The Germans are buying this for $9.90)
Chinese lottery winners: WBAI +5.6%, JD +4.7%, DANG +3.5%, JMEI +3%, BIDU +1.9%
Random horseshit: UQM +24.6% (China pyramid scamming, most likely), ASTI +18.2% (mapping for Mars. Talk about horseshit), CYTK +13.9% (rubbish), SBBP +9.2% (RA Capital Management discloses 12.7% passive stake in 13G filing–these guys are boss), SHPG +5.6% (phase 3 stuff), AGEN +5.2% (more biotech boredom ), YHOO +5.1% (riding BABA dick), PBMD +3.3% (fucking biotech), LOOK +2.8% (don’t bother), RMBS +2.5% (100mill buyback), TWTR +1.7% (IBM announces collaboration with Twitter and The Weather Channel), TASR +1.6% (Baltimore body cams-Reuters) AA +1.3% (CRAMER PUMP)
Analyst HORSESHIT: VMW +1.8% (upgraded to Heroin from Hold at Drexel Hamilton)
Lower
SHAMEFUL earnings: HCLP -21.4% (sand sucks), RRTS -18.5%, KN -13.8%, MSTR -13.2%, GIGA -13%, CMI -8.8%, AMKR -8.1%, ALSN -6.1%, CAKE -5.8%, HIG -5.8%, ERI -5.7%, FDC -5.7%, IACI -4.3%, CAJ -4.2%, UPS -3.9%, IPGP -3.8%, JBLU -3.3%, NVCR -2.8%, AGNC -2.7%, SWFT -2.6%, F -2.1%, CMCSA -2%, CR -1.9%, PCAR -1.6%, ICLR -1.3%
Miners that suck: MT -2.9%, BBL -1.9%, BHP -1.6%, VALE -1.3%
Oil and Gas that suck: SDRL -2.5%, RIG -1.9%, TOT -1.4%, RDS.A -1.2%, HAL -0.6%, SLB -0.5%
Random shots fired: MRVL -20.1% (PWC resigned; super red flag; Einhorn must be cursed), CTIC -13.1% (DILUTION), AAN -7.1% (in symp with RCII), GORO -5.4%, GLAD -4.3% (DILUTION), FDX -2.1% (in symp with UPS), TACO -1.9% (DILUTION)
Analyst comments: DSW -1.9% (downgraded to No Real Opinion from Buy at Sterne Agee CRT), LVS -1.7% (downgraded to Equal Shit at Barclays)
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