Egg Prices Hit Record Highs, Just in Time for Halloween

I don’t know about you, but when I was a kid, there wasn’t any trick of treating taking place in my neighborhood. We’d put on Jason masks and fill book bags with dozens of eggs and then attack other blocks with a maelstrom of poultry embryos that were so plentiful: they’d blot out the sun.

We’d also take shaving cream bottles and attach RAID bug spray caps to them, or aerosol caps, to make the shaving cream spray far and wide, so that we could destroy people with it. Back in my days (extra 80s), eggs were cheap. We didn’t give a shit about them. We’d hit people in the heads with them, and then laugh.

Nowadays, eggs are like caviar, expensive and rare. Thanks to exotic animal diseases, effectively wiping out 50 fucking million chickens this year, egg prices are through the roof– up 52% from the lows of 2015.

Get this, egg prices rose 32% in June alone, and now stand at the absurd price of $2.97 a dozen.

Fuck.

If I was a kid preparing for halloween now, my mother would smack me in the mouth if I asked for 3 bucks so that I could crack some eggs over Joey’s face.

The best way to play this is via CALM. Look at the profit ramp.

Stay $CALM and eat eggs. Sorry I had to say it.