BREAKING
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
15,407 Blog Posts

BANNED

Before the storm begins here, I want you to know grandpa stocks are doing just fine, dozing off on the porch, pleasantly going about their day without a care in the world. My positions in KMB and GIS are the envy of the market. But I also have a whole basket of other shit, behaving in an entirely different manner.

The jobs numbers were bad because we are repeating last year. This is almost identical to the fuckery that was 2011, only this time it will be sprearheaded by the fucking faggots in Spain. Why don’t you pussies revolt already?

Expect the data to get progressively worse, leading up to the Fed coming in and raping all shorts in broad daylight, with one of their fucked up plans. Then, miraculously, as the election nears, the data will improve. We will enjoy a terrific Q4 rally, as if this shit never happened.

Back in the old days, when a stock broke the $100 threshold, the shares were split 2 for 1. Only a handful of stocks kept their share prices at obnoxious prices, most aligned with the Great Fucktard himself: Warren Buffet. Do you know why companies don’t split their shares anymore?

Answer: because they don’t give a shit about the retail investor. The retail investor is no longer an integral part of the market place. They have been eviscerated by trading robots, cordoned off into corrupt areas of the market, such as 3x ETF’s. Gone are the days when you could value a company on its FCF and FPE.

Now to my point. The majority of people that I meet in real life are flawed animals, depraved beings with infected minds. Naturally, the internet is no different. I would never walk into someone’s home and throw meatloaf against their wall– and insult the caretaker or host of such a dwelling. Many of you are quite comfortable in flaunting your vagrant behavior by trying to rub salt in my wounds, declaring “I told you so” and gleefully walking about my website like a happy homo in the east village.

That’s where you are wrong.

This shit here is NOT for your entertainment. I am not the jackass clown in the glass box, waiting to be dunked into the water below. I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU, rip apart your limbs (legs, arms, head, chest cavity)–crush your bones into dust. All of you will be banned, all of you. I have already banned over 800 people, creatures of the blue lagoon, perverts, men addled with chemical imbalances. I have no problem carting you off to the crematory, so don’t fuck with me.

On a more pleasant note, I am being smashed like an accordion today, played by some monkey in a small Italian village. My WNR has been chopped and I’d rather not discuss YELP anymore. I am, without a doubt, the angriest man in the world.

If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please like our Facebook page

51 comments

  1. RightlySo

    Prepare the trenches for a mass burial…

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  2. TheArtist

    coal stocks just getting de-balled

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  3. leftcoasttrader
    leftcoasttrader

    Metals giving it all up.

    Now we can get back to our regular scheduled dollar vs the world.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  4. J

    oh oh. this is going to be ugly while beautiful at the same time.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  5. xxxHuggieBearxxx
    xxxHuggieBearxxx

    I knew gold would fucking fail.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  6. acehood

    Hope you have a comfortable couch.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  7. Dinosaur Trader

    This website needs a larger foyer. That would get people to behave.

    -DT

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  8. Downtown Josh Brown

    majestic

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  9. jmmpangaea

    “I am not the jackass clown in the glass box, waiting to be dunked into the water below. I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU…”

    Awesome.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  10. xxxHuggieBearxxx
    xxxHuggieBearxxx

    I feel like this is all a scam and a ploy to drive the price of oil lower.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  11. JTU

    I’m all in, everything I own is way down and I’m feeling the pain!

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  12. Beat

    Couldn’t agree more. The retail investor is playing a zero sum game.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  13. jimmy_two_times
    jimmy_two_times

    any bets on what level of SP QE gets released?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • The Fly

      10,500 Dow

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
      • Ouch

        Can’t wait to hear the spin from No Jobs Obama if the Dow gets to 10,500.

        “Let me be clear, this recent temporary dip in the financial markets is in direct connection to the other side of the aisle not passing all elements of our jobs bill, and not demanding that millionaires and billionaires pair their fair share.”

        • 0
        • 0
        • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
      • jimmy_two_times
        jimmy_two_times

        Thats what I was thinking betwwem 1000-1100 on the SP

        • 0
        • 0
        • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  14. Ouch

    I think the phrase of the day is:

    “Fuck me sideways running backwards beside an alligator”, or something to that effect …

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  15. Aaron Ashcraft
    Aaron Ashcraft

    Love your words – good grins on a shitty market day! BTW, I am an American expat retired to Barcelona. Economy sucks here- mostly because of anti private capital government policies, political parties beholden to unions. It is not a good place for business: too much red tape and far too costly to fire or lay off unproductive or unneeded employees. Lots of rhetoric from the newly elected President, but don’t know if he understands how difficult it is to do business here.

    If immigration reads this, I will probably be deported :-))

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  16. Montrose

    Is it wrong to expect some support for YELP from those folks integral to it going public? Seems they’d be talking it up some.

    Watching, learning, and growing more poor.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  17. Genghis Khan

    Fly- have your YTD gains been given back? Also, are you invested over 100%? If you were to sell, what’s the last stock you’d sell?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  18. Trading_Nymph

    See, this is why I think the NFP is so lame. From today’s report “The change in total nonfarm payroll employment for February was revised from
    +240,000 to +259,000, and the change for March was revised from +120,000 to
    +154,000.”

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  19. JewishMantis

    Fly,

    You are the fucking man and don’t let these vagrants tell you otherwise. You put your money where your mouth is, and then let the world know of it in an extremely eloquent manner.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  20. Mr. President

    When are you going to admit the positive correlation between your coffee consumption and YTD gains?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  21. the Bull

    Umm if I may? Comments are not visible on my state of the art iPhone 4S. Will they be in the near future?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  22. DH

    2nd angriest man right here

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  23. charlie

    Senor, I am short $CMG and $LULU. Perhaps you will join?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  24. Omeizer

    Soon enough, Mr. Fly, you will rejoice and take no prisoners with all the Cretans who doubted and will succumb to your superiority (as they did to the Greeks).

    Are you NOT Entertained? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FsqJFIJ5lLs

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  25. YELP is toast

    Y – Your
    E – Equity
    L – Lost
    P – Perpetually

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  26. Bullish

    Just an observation…
    The red box on the home page that shows number of views doesn’t match with the number of views on the blog page.

    Or maybe I’m misunderstanding the red box on the home page.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  27. Bobby Boucher

    Was surprised the CBOT equity put-call ratio was up to only .79 yesterday. I get the number from stockcharts.com which unfortunately is not available until 90 minutes or so after the market closes. I would like to get an intra-day value if I could. Checked the CBOT site but it seems intra-day is not available there. Maybe because it’s not calculated intra-day? Does anybody here know if it’s calculated intra-day and, if so, where to find intra-day quotes on this ratio?

    Thanks in advance!

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  28. rru2s

    It might be the first pullback in May to validate the market psychologists, but don’t forget equally important is the chart psychologists. After 2 really big down days we should bounce hard Monday for the same areas that were beaten down, like oil and materials. But whether the move will last, nah, just more sideways crap for the rest of this month.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  29. hitter

    any idea why $DK is out of the refiners drift today?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • DJMarcus

      because its fundamentally best and had the best numbers.

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  30. hitter

    Any ideas why $DK is so out of step with the refiners

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  31. donker

    I AM ADDING TO YELP AND STARTING A POS IN GSVC AND SVVC

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  32. bearearns

    One thing that never changes is amount of bears who come out in a red market and bulls in a green. Makes it slaughter anytime host is on wrong side given the pile on of oh I was this(short or long).

    This holds no opinion of market just more psychology of the pile on effect of public. Iif your position is makiing you are much more vocal, if not you are silent until it does. Why not just peace and calm regardless of position. Humble and poised

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  33. Xmas Ninja

    As a proverbial retail investor, I confirm that indeud the market is busting our balls here (and our WNRs). But I did pick up some TNA 20 minutes ago for a quick scalp. Hope springs eternal.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  34. ShamrockBaby

    Points for using the word “crematory” in a blog post.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  35. Gregoryph

    I just recently became an apostle. I find you very entertaining and have made some good coin on a few of your leads – lulu was a killer and i’ll hang on to my gsvc. I don’t trade enough in the US markets to seem to warrant a full blown PPT subscription though. Any other way i can contribute to the upkeep of the site?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  36. Dr Fly

    Join the blogger network.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  37. Ulcerative Bullitis
    Ulcerative Bullitis

    Wish you might say more re: the 3x ETFs+ other such vehicles. New to the strip, dumb as a gas huffer, curious as to the greater natures and implications of said instruments.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"