iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,446 Blog Posts

Fancy Friday

As The PPT and newly furnished 12631 deal with debilitating server issues, “The Fly” is eating foods fit for a fat King. Just so you know, “The Fly” is not fat and holds a good amount of contempt for those of you who are a bit portly. It’s not the fact that fat people are inherently lazy, but selfish. They want all the food to themselves and their gluttonous ways causes them to murder themselves vis a vis clogged arteries. How selfish of them!

With regards to this market: I am a bit distracted right now, due to the overwhelming response to 12631. It has effectively crippled a few servers and is now threatening the very life of our server guy, “Vincenzo.” You see, prior to launch, Vincenzo had placed his oversized barrels of extra virgin olive oil on top of “the iBC server farm,” inside the cold room. Once 12631 launched, the servers got so busy, so fast, that they began to shake, almost as if an earthquake was tossed down from the heavens into Vincenzo’s office. Because of all of the rattling, the olive oil fell to the ground, effectively drenching all of the iBC servers and ruining Vincenzo’s custom made sweater from Milan. As we speak, he is cleaning up the mess and will be working all weekend to make sure things are up to speed on Monday.

This market looks plain old bad. It has all of the hallmarks of the beginning of a down turn. The only thing that keeps me from selling everything and going to cash is recent history. Each minor blip has been met with pornographic buying sprees, by Wall Street’s degenerate money managers. Let’s give those fucking perverts some more time to get their cocks in order.

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16 comments

  1. TheV.King

    10th

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  2. WTF

    9th

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  3. drummerboy

    my god man! get the GARLIC, NOW! no time to lose, hurry

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  4. go2mars

    No fair. I thought down market days weren’t allowed anymore.

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  5. Yabollox

    Fat people rule. They are strong.

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  6. go2mars

    My guess: Someone knows QE will either be less effective than supposed, or will be reduced in scope due to very serious international pressure (Chinese missile launch near L.A.) In either case, the dollar may strengthen a bit here. Which would send stocks down to more reasonable levels, but be good for the economy in general, as monetizing debt is stupid.

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    • Colonel Von Ryan

      If they can do that then why did my daughters TinkerBell lamp break after a month…

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      • go2mars

        Hoping she’d slip on it. Or that you would send/waste a bunch more money for the next disposable lamp. Why do they put lead, melamine, and BPA in dog food and baby toys? Is the ineptitude intentional?

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      • heaterman

        Tinker Bell broke because the instated goal of the Chinese government is to turn the dollar and our country into shit in some form or another. So far they are proving to be very adept at it. We send them our capital and they send us worthless trash and trinket we want in return. Kinda like the early settlers here did to the natives……….. Seems we are too ignorant to see that simple fact.

        As a country we need to relearn to invest our money in things that make us more money rather than useless toys and trinkets that have no value other than entertainment. …….This is a very simple truth.

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  7. Rand

    Ahh, just finished a dozen of the best tamales i have had in years.
    Eight bucks and you cannot beat the price or the taste. TGIF

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  8. Lorena Bobbitt

    Just tossed this rally’s severed peckerwood onto the lawn of a local 7/11.

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  9. francesco

    who think this is the beginning of a major correction ? the 100 dd graph of the index look quite horrible

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