The Gods Love iBC

My secret to market mastery is magical—like Mickey Mouse, minus the gay ears and friendly demeanor.

Developing…

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While it’s true, “The Fly” is into sticking his chest out and spitting on 2nd place finishers; he also likes to play “financial vigilante” in his spare time. I share my thoughts with you, not only to build a 1st class financial website, but to help those of you on the outside trick the trickers at their own game.

The arguing on this site is healthy; after all, we are men. Men are programmed, through erroneous DNA, to hate one another. That’s why we punch each other in the face at parties and cut each others arms off during battles.

I’d ring alarms if, all of a sudden, all of you miscreants started to play nice, planning trips with one another.

As for the market:

I was up nearly 4% today, thanks to my long positions in banks, [[UYG]] , [[RKH]] . My energy plays took a step backward. But, I was able to knuckle my way in at the lower levels today.

Cognizant of possible light volume, end of August trickery, I sold out of my bank longs and Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc. [[LEH]] . I don’t want to press my luck, with the economy at a grind here—only growing 3.3% for the Qt. (rolling eyes).

My energy positions are bountiful. I will likely take some off the table tomorrow, ahead of the long weekend. There are so many short positions out there; I expect they will get squeezed.

Also, I like Equinix, Inc. [[EQIX]] , Southern Copper Corporation (USA) [[PCU]] and all of the military stocks, including Northrop Grumman Corporation [[NOC]] , General Dynamics Corporation [[GD]] , AeroVironment, Inc. [[AVAV]] and Lockheed Martin Corporation [[LMT]] .

However, at the present, “The Fly” is into pressing his luck, via egregious long bets on Western Refining, Inc. [[WNR]] , [[DIG]] , [[IEO]] and Arena Resources, Inc. [[ARD]] .

I bought 30,000 shares of Western Refining, Inc. [[WNR]] @$9.15. And, I bought 3,000 Equinix, Inc. [[EQIX]] @$80.15.

Disclaimer: If you buy WNR or EQIX because of this post, President Obama will outlaw oil. And, you may lose money.

Who wants to go short oil, into a long weekend, with a hurricane of death coming?

Tell me.

If so, you’re either a riverboat gambler or a degenerate OTB guy (no offense to online gamblers).

In my not-so-humble opinion, the easy trade is to get long Western Refining, Inc. [[WNR]] , Valero Energy Corporation [[VLO]] , Tesoro Corporation [[TSO]] , [[DIG]] and [[IEO]] into tomorrow, as Gustav shows his balls of fury.

If you choose, you can sell out tomorrow and take your winnings to the local race track. Or, you can roll the dice and hope Gustav will do some damage to those rigs, that cannot be fixed or walked away from.

Every once in awhile, it’s worth a shot to throw some dice. However, I suggest doing so, only if you have big gains (like me) to fall back on. If you are some sort of destitute loser, sit this one out or hedge it with a long [[DTO]] position.

Okay, now pay attention this time.

I am selling half of my [[RKH]] and [[UYG]] positions here, at $102.88 and $21.10. And, I am selling out my entire Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc. [[LEH]] position.

It was fun while it lasted.

I will sell the entirety of my RKH-UYG positions by the end of the day.

With the proceeds, I will likely hold cash or start nibbling at [[SKF]] or short Legg Mason, Inc. [[LM]].

Check that Update: I am buying Western Refining, Inc. [[WNR]] , [[DIG]] in size.

UPDATE: I am 100% out of my bank longs, selling RKH @ $103.05 and UYG @ $21.22. However, I will hold my Wachovia Corporation [[WB]] forever.

I am living on borrowed time, being long the banks and Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc. [[LEH]] . The circumstances were perfect for manipulation.

It all happened about 1 week ago….

I was becoming increasingly agitated by the lack of death and mayhem, within the banks and general indices. Then it dawned on me, like it must have dawned on Thomas Edison or that dumb Ford guy: do the opposite.

I’m sure Edison thought about making retarded candle lamps; but, instead, he decided to harness the power of Zeus to light brokerage firms across the nation.

Same with Ford. I bet he had plans to launch a new horse wagon or something; but, he eventually opted for a maniacal machine, operated by Saudi crude.

Evidentially, Ford was “addicted” to crude. Some might say he is the “Godfather of global warming,” “Mr. Diesel” himself. I just think he is the founder of a retarded car company.

Anyway, so it dawned on me, like it made sense for Genghis Khan to invade his neighbors on horseback, to get long the banks.

At first, I did it with the utmost amount of gingerly buys. Then, I got loud and boisterous. Finally, I ripped off my hedges, as if I was the Incredible Hulk, readying to punch a hole through a passing Ford SUV.

At the end of the day, I got lucky. God willing, I’ll get lucky again, just like Edison.

For now, I am addicted to oil, via [[DIG]] , [[IEO]] , Ultra Petroleum Corp. [[UPL]] and Arena Resources, Inc. [[ARD]] . Hurricane Gustav is a coming and he’s going to knock your power lines offline, effectively sending you back to the candle age.

I’ll get to you oil haters in a second.

As you know by now, “The Fly” is pimping this market with a very heavy hand, being long the banks. As unbelievable as it may seem, I knew this was coming, sort of like how animals know bad weather is coming (call me an ape and I’ll have your chest hairs punched off).

I sold out out of 95% of my inverse etfs’s yesterday, leaving me net long banks—in a very egregious way.

Part 2 of my victory will be in the energy pit—watch me.

Now I know many of you noodle twisters are big time oil bears. You make lots of offhanded, corny remarks, about how oil is “so doomed dude. Like totally, it’s going down.”

Let me remind you, criminals run the oil markets. They do not bow down to your asinine economics 101 rules. That’s like telling the Italian mafia to lower the interest rates on your loan, since Ben Bernanke lowered the Fed funds rate.

Sometimes I think many of you are delirious, from all of the misinformation you are fed, on a daily basis.

Calm down, put your charting rulers down and think.

Can we have it both ways—growth and lower oil?

Answer: No

Naturally, due to the nature of “betting on a storm,” oil will trade lower—should it (the storm) weaken or veer off course. But, the longer term picture has not changed. So, I will buy dips in crude and pray to Poseidon for furious winds to knock over those idiotic rigs, littering the Gulf of Mexico.

Aside from all that, I like Equinix, Inc. [[EQIX]] and short Legg Mason, Inc. [[LM]] .

This weekend, I’ll be chewing on 2 1/2 inch rib eyes, while you’re over salting flimsy skirt steaks.

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