The Final Blogging Lesson

Listen up, for you rarely get to see inside the mind of a creative genius (“The Fly”).

For the purposes of explaining how to blog with Godliness, I will use Lord Ducati, from Land O’ Fuckville, as an example. As you know by now, most things in life revolve around Ducati, one way or another.

It is telling enough that this man (Ducati), who I hate with all my soul (yes, I said hate), gets so much airplay on iBC. Fuck, we even wasted our time making a video about him.

Part of it has to do with my insane sense of humour (sic). But, most of it has to do with the genius and stupidity of Lord Duc.

See, Ducati’s blog is meaningless rubbish (I refuse to link to him out of protest). He offers no real advice, just a bunch of copy and paste crap—with lots of innuendo and vague suggestions. Duc is like a gay woman, who fools everyone else about her true gender. You look at her and think she’s a he—but she really is just a she with a very large adams apple and short haircut. I hope that made sense.

Don’t get me wrong, Ducati is very intelligent. He understands the basic principals of the market and is well versed in mathematics. His stupidity is well based in his over the top annoyance and lack of real opinion. He’s a meatloaf thrower, if I may be so bold.

At the same time, his pestering and willingness to have a discussion with complete strangers, for hours if need be, is his greatest strength.

He is a master promoter of his own bullshit blog, without even knowing it. He leaves his bullshit, yet thoughtful, comments on dozens of blogs—especially popular ones. By doing this, he creates a brand—which is “The Ducati.”

The key to being a successful blogger, assholes, is to brand yourself. First, you have to possess all of the basic qualities that will attract people, such as: intelligent/entertaining posts, good syntax, and most importantly, the willingness to engage your audience.

After you have that down, you need to get out there— and make yourself known. Some do it via leaving comments on other big blogs. Some do it by spam—or offering Godly services for free. And, a very small minority get lucky.

With regards to iBC:

Many of you make the mistake, tabbed and non-tabbed bloggers, of only catering to the iBankcoin audience. This is a foolish error.

See, your shit is already here. The site gets good traffic; but you should get out there (blogosphere) promoting your own brand, in order to build a loyal audience. If you were smart, you’d bring in your own audience and simultaneously feed off of iBC. Unfortunately, many of you are not smart. Too bad.

Consider “The Fly” the “Blog Godfather” and you’re my fucking soldiers. Go get me my money (traffic).

I say these things because, sometime soon, iBC will be opening some doors for many of you Peanut Gallery posters, including an opportunity to monetize your thoughts. Just know, blogging is a poor mans job. However, if done with precision and Godliness, you may one day be successful enough to make “The Fly” some more coin.

Godspeed

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