Bartiromo Out at CNBC- RIP CNBC

CNBC has lost another institution from its stupid finance channel to the zealots at Fox. One has to wonder what the hell is going on at CNBC. Clearly, they’ve become the Pittsburgh Pirates of financial news, playing second fiddle to Fox. Apparently the policy at CNBC is to milk the brand for as much as they possibly can, while allowing one talent after the next, no matter the tenure, to be allowed to defect to the enemy.

Who is in charge at CNBC and how are they still employed?

After the passing of Mark Haines, I thought they’d make a sincere effort to retain talent, especially those with insight and connections, like Bartiromo and Gasparino. Instead, they’ve adopted a ‘scorched earth’ policy, allowing C-level arrogance to infect the culture and further denigrate an already damaged brand.

After Cramer and Faber defect, CNBC is all but dead.

Come on, you people are stupid. Carl Icahn says the market might fall and you all sell? Why do you think he said that? He wants three seats on your stupid board and wants you out as CEO. He’d rather pay less for your retarded company than more. Being flush with cash, after selling some of his NFLX position, he wants to buy back cheaper.

Plain and simple.

If I was in a $1.5 billion cash position, I’d tell you the apocalypse was ’round the corner and that by owning stocks you all but assure yourselves being eaten by werewolves.

For the day, I lost 0.7%, all thanks to that big bozo, Carl Icahn, telling jokes to the jokers on CNBC.

What’s the matter with all of you? You’re too rich to type into the computer now? I bet you all have servants reading the site for you, reporting what’s relevant or not. Well, guess what, if you’re not being utterly ashamed, in one form or another, this isn’t worth it for me. I’ll head off to Eastern Europe and roam amidst the rubble, in search for ancient secrets.

Markets are looking stupid and retarded. It’s like hitting all-time highs has given us down syndrome of something. The direction is sloppy and the breadth is disgusting.

Aside from BALT, my other stocks are up and I am green. Truth be told, I haven’t had a break out move in over 3 weeks, almost this entire run up. I made my money the olde fashioned way, then tried to blow it that way too, squandered on the dumbest stocks known to man. Since then, I took my losses and retooled the ship, fitted for war and piracy. However, I haven’t found my bounty just yet.

On the souls of JP Morgan and James Cramer, I shall have my bounty, one way or another.

As for you, start talking, else I’m gonna blow up this website with everyone in it, women, children, it doesn’t matter.

With JKS’s big beat this morning, I am as excited as excited could be, heading into earnings for SOL.

3-D stocks continue to gather momentum, as DDD and SSYS gear up for retail offerings.

Futures are up and the market looks good, coming off rip roaring Chinese-Heng Seng 3% rips–due to reform proposals.

There are so many things working for the market now, one hasn’t been China. If this chinese crap is for real, expect to see copper, iron ore, steel and dry bilkers run higher.

Other than that, I’ll reserve my comments until after seeing the market trade today.

So far, so good.

It just occurred to me that most of the people I know are either mentally unstable or deeply depressed individuals. Like most Americans, these people want more, whether it be love, money or power. Without it, their incessant struggle to achieve leaves them vacuous, empty souls in search of importance. You might know these people as “social climbers” or “go-getters.” I view them as trolls.

It’s always better to be feared than loved–because love wanes. Fear is something much more permanent and resolute.

Case in point: people love to make money in stocks, but fear losses. Notice how quickly gains vanish when fear kicks in.

Seeking Alpha is an insidious institution of fear. They purport and spread it via their staff of sophists. When they disseminate their mistake riddled reports, fear infects the brains of the weak-minded, the one’s in the stock for momentum and not fundamentals. Quickly they sell and a dominoe affect takes hold. They’ve issued one bad report after the next, from short YELP at $20 to AMBA to ‘SBUX isn’t going to complete their all-cash offer of TEA due to pesticides’ to CVV to FLTX and now to NQ, with amazing results. They’ve been wrong on every single thing they’ve reported, yet the misfits from Yahoo finance continue to find it in their good/liberal hearts to allow them to publish their crap on Yahoo’s news feed. Without the news feed, Seeking Alpha’s tentacles of financial terrorism would minimized and the world would be a better place for it.

Since when do the “bloggers” or hired hit men at Seeking Alpha care about their readers? When was the last time they were held to account for their scandalous charges, most astutely done during quiet periods, a time when companies are left defenseless?

They offer premium services that allow members to receive these dastardly market moving articles 24 hours in advance. You are witnessing a modern day boiler room in the making, a denizen of stock manipulators and promoters congregating in one disgusting place for the sole purpose of self-aggrandizement. They “mark you up” via subscriber fees, then fleece you sorely with perilous advice.

This post was paid for by the Grande Reclusive Order of the Knights of the Lambda Calculus. They just want to help a few guys/gals out.

Technicals

OINK

BSPM

ONVO

OHRP

MITL

RMTI

FNMA

MUSA

CREG

NOAH

Fundamentals

ASMI

IBCP

CYOU

EBIX

TGA

NDZ

CGA

GSOL

KLIC

Top Ranked by Hybrid (combination of technicals and fundamentals)

GURE

SID

BSPM

CEO

GLNG

UBNT

TRW

AFL

SDRL

BRKS

You owe it to your wife and kids for putting up with your dreck.

Buy stocks, all the time. Do it on margin and often. Nothing, as far as I can see, can go wrong.

Before year end, YELP will trade 50x sales and acquire MSFT in an all-stock deal.

While my sarcasm might be obvious, my position is very clear. I am leveraged long into this Gilded Age of superfluous stock prices, waiting for my turn at bat.

Like yesterday, today wasn’t my day. I barely made any money at all. However, you and I both know there isn’t any cause for alarm. I shouldn’t rush art, especially when painting a masterpiece.

For the moment, my top picks are RBCN, BALT and GIMO.

What a crazy tape to be short! Are you short and why? What is your core thesis for betting against stocks? I am not trying to ridicule you. I just want to know the rationale behind such ruinious behavior.

I was gonna keep this new pick a secret until I positioned into it. However, since I am fully deployed and the market looks great, I think it’s only fair to share. The ticker symbol is (drum roll): CRTO. Go look it up and thank me later.

This week was all about housing stocks, a thesis that I’ve been bullish on for two years. Also, my YELP is screaming off the lows and I didn’t get in. I’m missing out in a variety of ways. Have you seen JAZZ lately?

Look, if you’re interested in short squeezes, it doesn’t get better than RBCN. Some very trust worthy people that I know think it heads to $20 and the stock hasn’t run yet. While it’s true, I am talking my book. It’s also true that based upon recent history, you will probably make more money, on a percentage gain basis, than me. Have you seen ONVO lately? Yeah, I knew about and positioned into it under $5.

My problem isn’t lack of success or an inability to find winners. My problem is patience. It’s the difference between an ordinary Wall Street stiff, making pedestrian rich man’s money, and the guy with his own jet.

The struggle continues.

I love “signature pieces of legislation” gone awry. For me, there is nothing better than seeing Obamacare implode from its own weight. Obama fixed himself with an albatross around his neck and now it is pulling him down. Republicans, however, need to stop celebrating, since this will only embolden our dear foreign leader to dictate, govern by fiat. He’s a gym teacher for christ’s sake. What did you expect?

In other more exciting news, Wall Street is being starved from 7 figure bonuses this holiday season. All of the government restrictions on using leverage and gambling with OPM has hit our local bankers where it matters most: their luxury car dealerships. Truth be told, banks should’ve never been allowed to gamble with deposits. It’s ridiculous to hear some of these people complain now.

Futures are higher and all is good on the eastern front. I’m looking into some of the newly traded companies to buy, since we’ve been bombarded with new issues, odds are some of them slipped through the cracks and offer value–similar to GOGO.

More later.

In a rip roaring tape, I lost 1% today. It wasn’t my day, even though my prophecies were coming to fruition, all over the place. From GOGO to ALJ, my advice remains a constant source of monetary winship, unparalleled in the crowded field of finance.

I am sure you BALT lovers rather enjoyed today’s action, when compared to the pinless hand grenade behavior in EGLE, GNK and DRYS.

Do not fear the tape. Do not fear anything at all. All will be well. The great whores who intermingle with the devil in an attempt to bewitch the markets towards tragedy have been routed. Ben Bernanke is on the offensive and General Yellen holds an atom bomb in her purse.

If you didn’t make coin today, you’ll make it tomorrow, or the day after. All you have to do is avoid the murderholes during earnings season and wait.

This isn’t too hard; but patience is certainly a virtue worth honing.