Come Get Your Thanksgiving Beat Down

Dow 30 components need to be bought, especially Citigroup Inc. [[C]] and General Electric Company [[GE]] . The market is in the process of taking the path of most pain. Unfortunately, for you turkey haters, that pain is to be distributed to short sellers, via much higher equity prices.

It truly is amazing; but then again, everything is.

Ride the wave of optimism, via getting long retailers. I forgot to mention another retail position of mine: GameStop Corp. [[GME]] . That fucker is so coiled back, it’s sickening. I actually want to vomit because of it.

Dice rolls include, but not limited to: Alcoa Inc. [[AA]] , The Mosaic Company [[MOS]] , United States Steel Corporation [[X]] , UnitedHealth Group Inc. [[UNH]] and The Blackstone Group L.P. [[BX]] .

UPDATE: I bought 10,000 [[M]] @ $6.95. And, I bought 3,000 [[FXP]] @ $61.25.

UPDATE II: I sold 3,000 [[UYM]] @ $12.50

1. Turkey
2. Cranberries
3. Stuffing
4. Corn
5. Pumpkin Pie

You fuckers need to quit eating out of death bags. The trend is up; catastrophe has been delayed. Into the rip, go ahead, get long some retailers, in a very, very non-homo sort of way.

On my sheets, I am long [[M]] and The TJX Companies, Inc. [[TJX]] .

On my watch list:

Polo Ralph Lauren Corporation [[RL]] , [[WACLY]] and The Timberland Company [[TBL]] .

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uITsSdBMGJM 450 300]

The Turkey Gods have spoken and they are throwing, mind you, large quantities of stuffing, with pinenuts, at those who sell equities short

Lesson #1: Never fuck with The Turkey Gods, on turkey week.

Lesson #2: “The Fly” wins all the time, even when he appears to be losing badly.

Look you, quit questioning the merits of the rally and how Citigroup Inc. [[C]] is “soooo over priced.”

Are you fucking kidding me? Asshole, did it ever occur to you that stocks did not deserve to be down at last weeks levels? Just because the market rallied 1,000 points in two days does not mean it is expensive.

As a point in fact, the market is still cheap and is likely to go higher.

I spent the duration of my afternoon just roaming around my office, elated over my big wins in Citigroup Inc. [[C]] , Bank of America Corporation [[BAC]] , [[TNA]] , [[UYM]] , amongst others. Moreover, I spent the duration of my afternoon making sure my investors thank the heavens for ever meeting me.

You fuckers have no idea how lucky you are to have me spew shit in your general direction. Without a doubt, I guarantee there is not a better trader, in the world, than Senor Tropicana.

Scientifically, it is an impossibility.

In closing, take notice of my wins and the manner in which I conduct myself, on ibankCoin. All of you other bloggers are simply not-good-enough; so quit posting on your bullshit blogs and begin making a meager existence in The Peanut Gallery instead, if you know what I mean.

Okay, I must go. “The Fly” has many things to do, such as devouring a 2 1/2 inch rib eye, while guzzling down a fine Bordeaux.

Top pick: Citigroup Inc. [[C]]

The harsh reality is: Goldman Ball Sachs lowered their EPS estimates for the S&P 500 to $55. That means, at current levels, we are trading 15x 2009 numbers. Going back to past recessions, the market got down as low as 8x and, usually, touched down on 10X.

If we trade down to 10x numbers, that means we’re going to 550 on the 500, which is pretty fucking hilarious, if you ask me.

But, in reality, people are just going to toss 2009 numbers to the wayside and try to crunch 2010. Sharp declines in GDP are always met with sharp increases. Therefore, taking into consideration the amount of worldwide central bank stimulus, one can make a strong argument that 2010 will represent a turning point for the economy.

Unfortunately, this little rally, that we are bathing in, will be short lived. The markets will suck goat nads for the next 6 months, until we can get some clarity on 2010.

Howsoever, bear market rallies are the best. They are sharp, insane and quite delicious. If played correctly, one could make a small fortune buying into bear market rallies.

As you know, “The Fly” intends to make large fortunes playing them. I will reserve the smaller ones for you.

So, with regards to the rally: it is not over. My guess, we run strong until Friday. It’s Thanksgiving, for Pete’s sake. People love getting long into the fucking feast. With my money, I will hold my bank longs, Citigroup Inc. [[C]] , Bank of America Corporation [[BAC]] , and play the 3x maniac etf’s, [[TNA]] and [[BGU]] , for some upside fun.

Also, at these levels, I like General Electric Company [[GE]] , [[TBT]] , NetGear, Inc. [[NTGR]] , Perini Corporation [[PCR]] and Knight Capital Group Inc. [[NITE]] .

Bottom line: I am keeping my [[FXP]] position, which is small, mainly because I am stubborn. This is NOT a market to short. You need to mud stomp the bears here, until their noses fall off.

Trade accordingly.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qG650xOxaok&feature=related 450 300]

Skip to 2:25 for your orders.

I can’t stand some of you rally haters out there, whether you lurk on the web or in real life. The funny shit is: the most bearish apocalyptic people I know were the most bullish, like 2 weeks ago. All of a sudden, these hatfuckers found “The Great Roubini,” ate a few of his meatballs, and now announce his edicts daily.

You fuckers make me sick. I know good investors when I read or talk to them. I can tell if someone has what it takes to make me money within 2 minutes of small talk. Mind you, the discussion does not have to be about stocks or the economy. I like to see how people think or react to intelligent or absurd statements.

Now, if you do not think we should rally today, following a 300 billion guarantee from the U.S. government, you’re smoking crack—plain and simple.

If you do not believe Citigroup Inc. [[C]] is going significantly higher, over the next month, you must have a heroin needle stuck in your neck.

And, if you are wasting money, through executing short sales today, might I suggest getting a brain biopsy done, STAT?

See girls, it’s not about winning everyday or about walking around with the coolest blackberry. Life is about, listen very closely, life is about kicking the other guy down the sewer pipe. And trust me, I mean that in a very sincere way.

Back in the old days, men would meet on muddy battlefields, in order to chop each others arms and legs off. Today, in the digital age, we just destroy each other financially, via egregious stock trades. You know, find out what Steve is short, then buy it as a result.

At the present, my top picks are Citigroup Inc. [[C]] , [[ROM]] , [[UYM]] , Bank of America Corporation [[BAC]] and General Electric Company [[GE]] .

Check my previous posts for more ideas. I’m fucking busy now.

I’m done caring about preserving capitalism or whining, like a little bitch, about the incredible burden on the tax payer. Fuck the tax payer and his credit carded ass.

At the end of the day, life is all about sticking it to the short sellers, with their deformed noses and burlap shirts.

Citigroup Inc. [[C]] was just about the easiest, yet most nerve racking, trade of the year. On one hand, I knew the gov’t had to defend the stock price, providing they were interested in saving the system and modern day finance. But, on the other, I was relying on people who are well known as standard, pre-packaged idiots to deliver.

Nonetheless, we have 300 billion reasons to rally today, and indeed we shall.

Aside from the banks, gold looks like it has some momentum. Check Wood for some gold fun. And, it appears treasuries are getting nailed to the ground today, which bodes well for [[TBT]] .

Commodities are up. Europe is sprinting higher.

Gentlemen, if I may be so bold as to say so, the Thanksgiving Rally has begun.

NOTE: This post was sponsored by “The Turkey Gods.”

The U.S. government has agreed to guarantee over $300 billion of Citigroup’s troubled assets — loans and securities backed by residential and commercial real estate and other such assets.

Fuck you shorts, you’re dead!

UPDATE: Details, via Federal Reserve website. Preferred stock exercisable north of $10. Sounds good to me.

On a bank rally, here is a list of stocks worth following/buying:

[[WBK]] Banco Santander, S.A. (ADR) [[STD]] Bank of America Corporation [[BAC]] JPMorgan Chase & Co. [[JPM]] Banco Itau Holding Financeira S.A. (ADR) [[ITU]] BlackRock, Inc. [[BLK]] PNC Financial Services [[PNC]] Signature Bank [[SBNY]] Umpqua Holdings Corporation [[UMPQ]] BancorpSouth, Inc. [[BXS]] The Bank of Nova Scotia (USA) [[BNS]]

UPDATE: Citi opened +50% in Germany. Here is link to quote.

The Turkey Gods have spoken.

UPDATE: iBC introduces, “The Citi Bailout Wire.”