Merry Xmas to You and Yours from House Fly

There’s about a dozen biotech stocks up double digits today, one of which I am long. Since it’s Xmas eve I will tell you said stock, as a gift from me to you (A Christmas Miracle!). PRVB. I am also enthusiastically hopeful for the following stocks — all positions of mine: ROKU, XP, GBT, CLR.

The latter is an oil play, which is subject to volatility. But ’tis the season for oil. Be patient and hold them and by spring your portfolios will be rich with grandeur.

Some random news items that caught my eye this morning.

Travis Kalanack, former CEO and co-founder os UBER is severing all ties with company and selling ALL of his shares. Good for him.

The S&P is +40% since last year today.

Trump is rolling back more EPA laws.

Byron Wien likes gold for 2020.

Bearish Morgan Stanley analyst on TSLA still believes stock will drop 40%.

Everyone is fucking bullish.

How can I sit here with markets at record highs, ebulliently singing higher, and tell you this will all end and how the fires are being kindled now and will burn bright and hot soon — crisping everything you see before you to a dark cinder? I cannot. So, instead of that, I’d like to wish you a very happy Pagan Xmas, to you and yours. I hope you purchased more than I did, wasting time at the mall, Target, and wherever the wife directed you. There is much yet to do, last minute presents to wrap, and food to prepare for tonight’s festival. It is not time to relax.

Since I’m booze-free until summer, I will not be enjoining you for a drink by the fireside. Plus anyway, it’s 60 degrees here and the southerners around me will probably be firing up their smokers soon, roasting whole pigs on a spit. I will be cooking a rib roast to medium rare, no matter how many times Mrs. Fly tells me “it’s still pink, we’re gonna get poisoned.”

“Incorrect Sir!” will be my answer. I will not tolerate such ramblings from a crazy person. A well marbled prime rib should only be served medium rare. Periodt.

I am sure there are one or two items for me under the tree. But the gift I am looking forward to most are my black plastic disposable gloves that I bought on Amazon. Gone are the days of my hands smelling like onions and garlic after I cook a meal. Now when I am Iron Chef in the kitchen, I will adorn professional grade black plastic gloves. Why does that make me happy? Who knows? Perhaps I am insane.

Happy holidays and to my jewish friends happy Hanukkah. Don’t slip on those dradles spinning all around the house.

There are sectors and trades and then there is biotech. Let me promote someone inside Exodus for a second, one of many strong traders with a hankering for depravity.

Enter Rockridge87, esteemed member of House Rockefeller — heir to a $300 billion fortune.

He thrusted himself onto the scene last week with a move so bold, so insane, it caught some attention and actually paid off in spades. His ITCI gambit concluded today in a 200% single day affair. I believe he played the options too, which yielded a 700% return — which seems low.

The point here is you cannot do it alone and finance Twitter is a laughable fucking farce. If you’re not in a room of like minded people trading all day long — how the fuck else will you hive mind this fucker to produce ideas like this? Sure, I can spit our great picks and find ideas that are atypical. I just sold OYST and NXTC for huge one day returns. But when you have an army of fuckers just like me all searching and sharing, well then, you have something akin to AI — helping you succeed on the market. That’s my Xmas pitch to you.

For the balance of my day, I will be shopping — because nothing says Xmas like $10k worth of absolute shit under my tree. Don’t tell anyone I said this — but I truly despise Xmas. I wish it was something better, something to celebrate without stress of having to buy people presents. It really is more than the money, but the stress of having to think of things to buy. This is why I prefer Halloween — a proper pagan holiday that requires nothing but dead people and candy.

I’ll be blogging later or tomorrow. So don’t go anywhere just yet.

Oh, I am still 100% long — just bought another 5 biotechs into the close. Look at the sector.

UPDATE:

Whoa … the stock is so high lol

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) December 23, 2019

We’re there. It was a rough year for Elon, a year in which he got in trouble for tweets and smoking pot — said ‘funding was secured’ at $420 and got in trouble with the SEC.

Am considering taking Tesla private at $420. Funding secured.

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) August 7, 2018

With just a silly tweet and a love for pot, @elonmusk shows ‘dem fundamentalist investors that you really can create voodoo support/resistance out of thin air. #TSLA420 pic.twitter.com/AjWsFWEngO

— wallstreetbets (@wallstreetbets) December 23, 2019

Fast forward a little more than a year and TSLA is a cunt’s hair away from $420? Magic or is Elon a fucking space traveler?

Also, fuck Business Insider for posting a thousand negative stories on Musk and Tesla. May you forever choke on your fossil fuels. Think about how stupid that term is, “fossil fuels”, as if crude was created by dinosaur bones. The fuck out of here.

What should I discuss here on this finance blog — fucking stocks? It’s the end of the year, end of a decade, and I have a lot of shit to discuss. For example, what a decade! Lots of chicanery. Even on this olde site, which I can discuss if you want. But most of you just lurk now and only comment inside Exodus — like the little rat fuckers you are. Last week I unveiled the top 10 movies of the 2010s. Now I will unveil the top shows, in my opinion of course.

Bear in mind, I consume a lot of information — far more than the average person. In recent years I have not been too prolific — but I’m still above average. I will not include shows that began before 2007, so that disqualifies a fuckload of shows. Again, this is my opinion, which is paramount — since I have the finest taste.

Since I truly enjoyed all of these, I will not rank them in order, but simply count 10 great shows (min 3 seasons).

1. Game of Thrones
2. Homeland
3. Sherlock
4. Black Sails
5. Turn
6. Better Call Saul
7. Breaking Bad
8. Downton Abbey
9. Peaky Blinders
10.Eastbound and Down

Honorable mentions: Hannibal, The Crown

Long day ahead for me, so I’ll just data dump on your faces — give you something to think about the next few days. It should be noted, when I started this fucking blog in 2007, reading is what people did — or watched TV. There wasn’t an Instagram and lots of people had blogs. Now, I am quite literally one of the last finance bloggers in the world. Sure there are a slew of fuckheaded financial advisors online, shilling for bucks. But how many them are Master Ace Traders (MAT) and how many of them are Space Alien Magicians (SAM)?

Zero.

The blogosphere is dead, an antiquated form of communication left for dinosaurs like me. I come here everyday in an flaccid attempt to communicate with a doped up ADD sensitive populous, discussing trading and others matters pertaining to things that gentlemen like to discuss. My reward has been far and few, but the payoff will be grandiose — when I finally finish my Orbital Space Cannon (OSC) and annihilate you from 100,000 feet above.

Here are the losers for 2019.

PTR -20%
HDB -38%
FOX -24%
UBER -27%
CHA -21%
OXY -37%
NOK -38%
KHC -25%
WIT -25%
BT -30%
CX -21%
PINS -21%
CGC -26%
LYFT -38%
ELS -28%
WORK -44%

I had harvested some gains earlier today, moving to a 40% cash position, solidifying my place under your Xmas trees and the sole person who has literally purchased presents for your kids this holiday season. Sans my sage advice, you’d be panhandling for Mcdonald’s tier toys right now.

God is good.

I closed out today a man with hair in his chest, but none on his face. All good men shave twice per day and make sure there is never a glimpse of hair on his face. Plans for the day entail fancy restaurant in Raleigh with southern hipsters, then a movie. Over the weekend, I will endure even more shopping and of course my fucking Benz — which plagues me to no end.

I’d like to take this opportunity to say you’re welcome.

Good day.

On Xmas morning when your greedy little kids run down the stairs to see what Satan Claus left from the night before — when you see the joy in their beautiful faces, remember it was Le Fly that made it possible. I am quite literally Santa and I have enabled you to purchase all of said presents this year. Ergo, you owe me a great deal of good will and appreciation.

This is today’s bounty.

CRCM +15.9%
WYNN +4.88%
NFLX +3.24%
JWN +4.8%
ESPR +3.4%
PINS +4.5%
OAS +8.7%
JD +4.4%

I caught a buyout in CRCM. Feel free to alert the SEC and DOJ of my transgressions. Those fucking bastards can suck my doorhandles.

See pal, that’s who I am and they’re nothing. I catch buyouts in less than a week before the pagan holidays, splashing snow and shit into the face of my enemies.

Presently, I am 40% cash, throwing bowling balls at the people down below, smoking an estate pipe and generally pleased with the events of the day.

This is a scientific list. Not up for debate. One cannot negotiate with science. If you provide a list that is contrary to this, you will be sought after and killed.

Best movies of the 2010s (any genre):

2010 – Inception
2011 – Midnight in Paris/Sherlock 2 (tie)
2012 – Django
2013 – 12 yrs Slave
2014 – Interstellar
2015 – Sicario
2016 – La La Land
2017 – Dunkirk
2018 – Deadpool 2
2019 – Joker

Don’t reply. Not a debate.

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) December 20, 2019

UPDATE: I made an error in 2018. It should be Avenger’s Infinity War, without question.

Pro-tip for anyone in the market for a car: never buy the fucker — just lease it and dump it back onto their faces after the term is up.

I made the horrible mistake of buying my car, a GL 450, and have been harangued by it since day 1. Things really started to get dicey after the warrantee expired — which is both funny and incidental.

Upon reaching NC, I brought the car over to the local shoppe and fixed it for $10k. No big deal. I had a cam-shaft issue that needed some fixing — an onerous job but someone had to do it. There was also an issue with the car kicking back on me while decelerating, so I brought it in for a look. They said it was a software issue and would only cost me $155. I gladly paid them their coin and drove the car back home with even more kick-backs then before. The God damned car kicks me in the face like a horse would — upon hitting the brakes or climbing up hill. It is literally one of the worst cars I’ve ever driven, especially under said conditions.

So I brought it back to the dealership for a glance over and they didn’t know what was causing it, so they sought out the expertise of some German engineers. Lo and behold, the transmission is fucked and they’d like to charge me $2,600 for their troubles. Instead of doing that, I simply said “fuck off” and “I would prefer to drive the car into a ravine, then fork over another $2,600 into this pile of shit.”

What this means for me is two fold.

1. My stocks are going to scream higher. Personal issues, whether with the home or car, typically precede dramatic lifts in my stocks.

2. LIFETIME BAN on any Mercedes Benz vehicles at House Fly. I own two cars, both Benzes, and I will be tossing them into the fires very soon.

*** NEED A GREAT GIFT FOR THE HUSBAND OR WIFE — BUY “THE FLY’S” FAMILY FRIENDLY BOOKS ABOUT HIS LIFE DURING THE DOT COM BOOM AND BUST! ***

When I was in my 20s I’d walk in public with jeans, cotton shirts, shorts and even hoodies. Then when I became a man, a true man, I tossed all of my shorts and made sure all of my pants were pressed and my winter garb cashmere or high quality wool. My shirts would be button down and tucked in and on occasion I’d slum it and wear a t-shirt. This evolution in my style faced stiff resistance at home with Mrs. Fly, who preferred that I wore perhaps sports jerseys and maybe some novelty t-shirt — and maybe some ripped jeans. Sorry to disappoint, but I am built from studier stuff.

About a decade ago, and I will remember this like it was yesterday for the balance of my life, my mother in law destroyed my entire collection of cashmere sweaters, by washing and drying them all, very hot, and into a burning dryer. Apparently she believed such a material would resist and be immune to the hostile environs of an oven turning over and over, tumbling even. Over the years much of my wardrobe has been destroyed in the wash, pants that made their way into the machines, sweaters that bled their colors onto said pants etc etc.

A common argument at House Fly is “why do you buy clothes that require dry cleaning?” To that my response is clear, “a gentleman does not wear clothes that are washed in domestic machines. Good day to you.” This always draws her ire and prompts her to remind me that her wardrobe doesn’t require such a service.

“Sounds like a you problem” — and the soliloquy of nonsensical banter goes back and forth until it reaches a heave. It’s never-ending and malignant. Why, just today my only cashmere scarf was tossed into the wash and dried and destroyed. I was told after the fact that “it was a very hard and rough scarf — why do you buy such things?” To that, me being years older and wiser, I simply smiled and declared “it was a dreadful old thing — we should throw it away at once.”

Younger readers of this site might be up in arms right now, reading this travesty, this crime against fine clothing. But what’s done is done and the fastest way towards divorce is engaging one’s spouse in nonsensical debates. A man should never engage a woman in emotional debates — because it serves no purpose. It’s best to placate, ignore even, become scarce, control the mood by removing yourself from the argument. If your loved one prefers to argue with herself, do not get in her way.

As for my cashmere scarf, I now know to keep them out of reach from the cleaning machine and will see to it next time to Anne Frank the fucker far out of reach from the authoritarian regime that patrols this house.