iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,474 Blog Posts

ENOUGH With the Financial Advice

The nerve of you fat catamites, coming to this place of stock market wizardry to offer me advice! That’s like going to the Pentagon and offering your strategies of war, learned from the countless hours of studious concentration derived from droning about the couch playing the arcade games.

Just because I am stuck in the mud, frolicking amongst the sheep, doesn’t mean that I am destitute to the point of accepting advice from the plebians in the readers class. I’d rather die a horrendous death of barbarous torture and amputation before submitting to the mercy of your intellect.

That’s not to say a great lot of you aren’t great traders and overall decent folks. As a matter of fact, I find your company to be entirely transfixing, in a good way. I draw an abundance of laughter and amusement from the internets and will continue to do so for the next 1,000 years, as it is the fate of iBankCoin to live forever, immortal and immune from the pangs of death.

But, do not believe for a second that “The Fly” is in the market for advice, especially of the financial variety. Respect these simple boundaries and you and I can be friends for as long as you live. Disobey them and we will speedily become arch enemies, just like the stories in your comic books when the anti-hero rips a beating heart out of his enemies chest cavity and eats it, while laughing at the CNBC for telling great jokes.

Good night.

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12 comments

  1. gravestonedoji

    A Thousand Year Reich?

    Here’s some advice: Take Moscow First! Doh!

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  2. halfbloodpope

    As a young fledgling in my craft, my mentor once said to me, “There are those in life who row the boat, and those who steer the boat. I suggest you start rowing else learn to swim.”

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    • The Fly

      I sink your battleship!

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    • gravestonedoji

      That’s old thinking Pope. And frankly, its seditious. New post-partum thinking is that you sit in the back of the boat and steal the food and water of those rowing and then complain about how slow the boat is moving.

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  3. ironbird

    Will Shillary be the “I told you so” candidate? Or will a fat man simply sit on err and declare victory? Gotta love 0care, everyone is trying to run away from it, but they voted for the fucking thing.

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  4. ironbird

    40 acres and a mule minus the mule and the 40 acres. The new normal.

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  5. clock

    Tesla Motors (TSLA) earnings will be interesting this afternoon. Don’t own any yet….but looking. (not advice!!)

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  6. clock

    Dr. Fly says….
    “Just because I am stuck in the mud, frolicking amongst the sheep, doesn’t mean that I am destitute to the point of accepting advice from the plebians in the readers class.”
    ======================
    Dr. Fly, me thinks that lots of peeps here would like to be ‘stuck in the mud’ like you… with your gains for the year.

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  7. juice

    Dispense with the financial advice .. Le Fly is coming from a place you couldn’t begin to fathom. 😮

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  8. MX2101

    re: HBP
    I see The Fly has a good memory for a noteworthy and well turned phrase…

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  9. granpa

    Fly, you called out GTAT and RBCN back in April once again proving to all you possess a Time Machine.

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