Oh Lord, Cramer Was Just Clown Slapped

Everyone in the business knows CNBC is full of shit. But now it’s getting interesting, as regular folk start to see through their bullshit, which will inevitably result in the networks demise. Write it down.

Tonight Jim Cramer embarrassed himself, with hat in hand, as a guest on the Jon Stewart show. Seriously, dude, why fucking going on the show, if you are going to act like a pussy?

Cramer allowed himself to be humiliated for no good reason. I have never seen anything like it.

Personally, I was emphatic about seeing this interview, due to the assholishness broadcasted on CNBC day and night— who regularly apologize for corporate criminals and first class douchebags. In an odd twist of irony, mixed with woeful inadequacy on behalf of the media, it took a fucking clown on a Comedy channel to bring Cramer into the public view, to deliver a much deserved “he-man bitch slap.”

Finally.

UPDATE: Here is the Stewart vs. Cramer vid.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J4j69NKJqwM 450 300]

Okay, we caught a 10% jump off the lows. My gut says we rally until May. However, we will not run up in a vertical line. So, with that in mind. I sold out of my entire TNA position, in an effort to decouple myself from 300% upside etf fuckery.

Selling TNA gives me some buying power to nibble on other names. But, I would rather wait for a pullback, considering we are still in a bear market and all. Right now, my cash position is north of 60% and my gains are north of 23% aka “more than you.”

God willing, the market gaps up tomorrow, enabling Senor Tropicana to sell more of his well timed longs, just in time for a glorious weekend.

NOTE: My AXP ripped higher, despite multiple downgrades. Fuck you Goldman. Fuck you Citi.

I sold my entire TNA position, between $14.60-14.74.

Don’t step to “The Fly” with stupid shit, you wretched women. I am bowling on you assholes, hitting strikes and such, while you’re over there getting crucified in your shorts.

I warned you to never bet against my fucking time machine.

Much to your chagrin, you now understand, “The Fly” does not fuck around, when it pertains to managing money. Sure, others have hot hands and make decent calls. But, let it be known, no one on this stupid planet has the investment acumen of “The Fly,” not Bill Miller, not you.

Thus far, I have sold nothing. I am long egregious amounts of TNA, UYM, AXP, PCR, KIM, LOGI, NTGR, amongst others, and do not give a fuck about Great Depressions or “spiraling economics,” at this moment in time.

For now, I shall rejoice in the splendour, known as “space alien magician trading,” only found on iBC, not to be confused with the many imitators and player haters across the internets.

Guns and drugs are in style these days. Whether it be SWHC, RGR, DNA or TEVA, Wall Street loves it, mainly because we are drowning in debt and people are ready to start shooting each other for a bowl of grapes.

As an aside, I’m up to my old tricks, winning again. My gains in TNA are terrific. My future gains in PCR will be grande.

Into more strength, I will sell these bitch of a whore stocks that I own, in exchange for cash. Then, I will sit down in my “fancy chair” so that I may watch the cash, in all of its glory.

I will let you in on a little secret, which I am happy to share with some of you: The Moon of Mars are aligned so perfectly, it would take a nuclear detonation on Wall Street itself to stop the current rally. Betting against such unfolding events does not look like bravery, but madness.

I will never forgive DPZ for putting me in the hosptial. Ever.

Good day.

About 3 weeks old, yet still brand fucking new. Funny how that shit happens.

UPDATE: Alpha penned a fantastic post.

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XhyYUMq1kPo 450 300]

My Voodoo physician says, and I quote: “the market will make your enemies choke on black dust.”

This is great news for me, as you can understand. Being “The Blogfather,” I have many enemies and many battles to wage. All over the internets, people are trying to take my crown, amidst their fuckery and abject stupidness. Truth be told, Senor Tropicana does not like people. He does not talk to his neighbors, with exception to “Steve.” And, he does not like to “hang out” with the local morons at the local golf course.

Life, as it is now, is all about collecting wins. Keep in mind, these wins I speak of may seem scurrilous to the likes of you, a “non-winner.” However, just know, winning stuff is what keeps me going. Should misfortune come my way, via some sort of galactic disturbance (resulting in losses), I would be forced to live out the rest of my life as a sanitation worker or even worse: a venture capitalist (the horror).

For the day, I made money. That’s all you need to know, at this point in time. I am looking for more gains, which in turn, will result in more wins for my vault.

Top pick: Quit being an ingrate and subscribe to The PPT. Failure to do so will result in great SHAME and famine for your family.