iBankCoin
18 years in Wall Street, left after finding out it was all horseshit. Founder/ Master and Commander: iBankCoin, finance news and commentary from the future.
Joined Nov 10, 2007
23,452 Blog Posts

TO THE FAZMOBILE

We have new advertisers on iBC, as you can tell by the plethora of ads on the site. So you know, certain parties are APPALLED by the profanity used on iBankcoin, since it is the antithesis of a clean corporate culture. With that in mind, you know “The Fly” is a business man first, entertainer second. So, from here on, iBankCoin will feature fewer words that are illegal to God and all of his sheep. After all, the Godly folks at iBankCoin are all about conforming to the mainstream, with the dear hopes of one day unseating Dennis Kneale and the ugliest man on tv without a mask— Zach Karabell— as fixtures on CNBC.

For your information, “The Fly” has been frustrated by this cock-sucker of a market today. I mean, for the love of malfunctioning airplane rudders, can the assholes who operate this market make up their cocksucking minds already? I am here, literally, throwing objects around my office, trying to kill people—due to the insanity known as the mother fucking stock exchange. If you are a young punk-kid, graduating from college, DON’T enter the field of money management. It is wrought with corruption, stress and outright fuckery.

I wake up, in the middle of the night in cold sweats, saying to myself “self, you should have been a Doctor or a fucking space alien magician.” Instead, I get to deal with ingrates, on a daily basis. You think people are happy to be up 120%, during the worst investing climate known to man? WRONG.

These fuckers are never happy, always bitching about the last missed opportunity. Granted, some people are normal and enjoy the luxuries of having a fucking rockstar for a money manager. But, for the most part, like most of you, THEY ARE FUCKING INGRATES.

One day, you will see, watch me, I will just disappear—off to Ireland or some shit to become a Leprechaun. I will go back to my roots and run the green fields with my goats, while throwing molotov cocktails at my neighbors’ cottages, all the while smiling.

As you know by now, I am digging in my heels with this market, not really giving a fuck about the pervasive weakness. I like Tesoro Corporation [[TSO]] , Starent Networks Corp. [[STAR]] , ANADIGICS, Inc. [[ANAD]] , General Cable Corporation [[BGC]] and Sonus Networks, Inc. [[SONS]] , no matter what the corn-cob fuckers on the teevee say.

If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter

60 comments

  1. Gio

    Best rant ever! good style there

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  2. franky

    do not stop soul chucking swears. its one of my favorite things about this site — we can say it, mean it, and be completely understood…

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • Jimmy Hill

      Good to see that we won’t be losing the sailor talk. I live for such classics as “big dicked gains”. Sometimes a few words are worth a thousand disturbing pictures.

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  3. Yogi & Boo Boo

    OMFG – Another classic. Indeud!

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  4. TheArtist

    as you know by “now” I think you mean….

    carry on.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  5. mustard seeds

    Nothing like a pissy (but not yet pissed) Irishman in a hot kitchen to keep the vulgarities away from the children..Outfuckingstanding rant

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  6. Maserk

    “I mean, for the love of malfunctioning airplane rudders”

    Classic.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  7. The Fly

    Thanks, I know. “The Fly” has many talents.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  8. RaginCajun

    Best.Post.Ever.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  9. Cash-N-Guns

    RBY…Jakes fav…on the move

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  10. Anton Cigur

    A warm, friendly “hello” to all your new ball-gargling advertisers.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  11. TA

    Usually my eyes glaze over at the constant ranting bullshit the fills the blogspehere.
    No one really gives a fuck what you or anyone thinks but this was quite exquisite.

    People are all selfish greedy assholes – I just assume the worst from everyone. Once in a while someone suprises me.

    A toast to ‘who gives a fuck’

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  12. Pillaging your mom
    Pillaging your mom

    fuck all this talk about cleaning up the site. if i wanted that stupid shit i’d go to any of the other 3
    51681651851 sites out there. this site cracks me up and thats why i read it daily.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  13. TheArtist

    for the number one hurricane month of the season UNG sure is sucking sweaty goat balls….. glad I’m not in that fucker this year.

    and the malfunctioning airplane rudders line is totally classic, as commented earlier by Maserk.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  14. Ecchymosis

    I’m enjoying the new potty-mouth-free site! Make your coin quickly because…http://www.prisonplanet.com/russian-professor-collapse-of-america-could-begin-in-two-months.html

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  15. WardandJuneCleaver
    WardandJuneCleaver

    We have noticed the vulgar language on this blog also. We take out the bad words before we let Wally and the Beav read your posts and the comments. The problem is that we found out that Eddie Haskell has been posting on your blog under a pseudonym and letting the boys read his comments. We think Eddie Haskell has been posting under the name of Chuck Bennett so we would appreciate it Mr. Fly if you took care of this problem.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  16. Flipper

    Thanks for keeping it clean.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  17. Flash Trader

    I thought Fazmobile meant the Fly had gone short. Notice again how my tradebots keep the afternoon hours so even and flat? Remarkable, no? Is the Flymobile a green machine?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  18. TraderCaddy

    Is Henry Fool out there?
    Any opinion on a former bio high flyer NBIX?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  19. mrkcbill

    A glimpse of genius….thanks fucker.

    You really had me …you little bitch.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  20. BIGPUN2012

    LOL all I can muster right now.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  21. mrkcbill

    TBT come to Pappa

    Time to refi in about 30 days.

    I just set the Over / Under on the dow into the close I say down (50)

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • DMG

      Indeud…may see rates below 5% again soon…

      Ginnie Mae 4.5% – 30 year Up 13/32nds at 101.328
      Fannie Mae 4.5% – 30 year Up 14/32nds at 101.109
      Fannie Mae 4.0% – 15 year Up 6/32nds at 101.25
      Fannie Mae 4.0% – 7 year Up 3/32nds at 101.062
      Ten Year Treasury Note Up 18/32nds at 102.781
      30-year Treasury Bond Up 50/32nds at 106.75

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  22. EN1GMA

    I believe the attempt to curb thy language was quite unsuccessful before

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  23. ALEX

    FLY WHAT DO WE DO WITH VLO

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  24. so i herd you liek mudkips
    so i herd you liek mudkips

    went net long QQQQ for overnight trade (planning on unloading quickly), i would also be long FXI and short VIX options, however my GLD shorts raped me today and planning on holding them through — treasuries (multiplied by DXY) market is smarter than the dumb-money-gold-market.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  25. kouchuu

    So gasoline goes up and TSO goes down. Fly you got some splainin to do.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  26. kouchuu

    Now if only we can get COMPX to close in the red….

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  27. JF

    Fuck Yes!

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  28. kouchuu

    And there it is. The DRVcopter may be upgraded to a DRVrocket by end of week.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  29. Gunners

    A-Fucking-Plus

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  30. Dubz

    hahahaha , muahahahhahaahahhahahahahah, bahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahah

    that is all.

    P.S I know what you’re talking about, hence I sold my house, quit my job and am “fucking right off”.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  31. kim jong il

    don’t forget to buy the dips… dipwads.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  32. kim jong il

    “One day, you will see, watch me, I will just disappear—off to Ireland or some shit to become a Leprechaun. I will go back to my roots and run the green fields with my goats, while throwing molotov cocktails at my neighbors’ cottages, all the while smiling.” i have to admit… that’s the funniest fucking shit i’ve read all year. nicely done, mcfly.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  33. akflyer

    I am one grateful f***ker and just love the color commentary.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  34. chanci

    I do enjoy the occasional cuss word. 🙂

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • Po Pimp

      You got dat right.

      I wore out my Too $hort cassette back in da day. Absolute classic.

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  35. Juice

    Refiners are up in AH

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
    • PoorOkie

      Well fuck, they have to go up sometime. They can’t go straight down can they? WNR has been kicking my sack.

      • 0
      • 0
      • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
      • Juice

        Me too, but I have stuck with it and bought more. When it pops, it will be quick and violent.

        • 0
        • 0
        • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  36. Fly Leech

    This reminds me of one of my favorite movies: “Grand Torino”. Teach them what it’s all about Fly.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  37. Braveflaps

    One man’s malfunctioning airplane rudder is another man’s wrongly inserted jack screw. In either case, it spells return of the Fuckery – the only band to survive five ditchings and an in-air salmon mousse.

    A special Fly fortune cookie to LULU, FCX and SPY.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  38. dave

    If you need a good laugh try…..

    Demented Children’s Books

    http://www.manofest.com/Galleries/Funny/50-Demented-Children-s-Books/50-Demented-Childrens-Books_41-5066.html

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  39. MX2101

    After a depressing afternoon in D.C. that post got a good belly laugh out of me. Thanks

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  40. Bobby Boucher

    Mosca, could you please at least keep the title of each blog entry free of vulgar terms? Damned, fucking Websense here at work prevents me from reading your post if there’s a curse word in the title. I like to read the posts as real-time as possible and that means checking in from time to time while I’m supposed to be working. Gracias.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  41. retox

    One of the best rp songs ever – and very apropos: Too $hort – Cuss Words

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHdbJbBA4Bg

    So you motherfuckers thought I was gonna change my style?
    – so what are you saying todd?

    To all you bitches, hoes, and all that shit
    Heres another rap that Im ready to spit
    It goes like this, my name is $hort
    Im tearin shit up like never before
    Pimp slaps, makin snaps
    Cold cash money and too $hort raps
    Oakland, california thats where Im from
    The city where the boys say you dont want none
    But if you do, Im gonna tell you this
    ( ) aint really shit
    Wanna roll so hard, all of the time
    You and that bitch playin too $hort rhymes
    If you aks me, what its all about, Ill say its about that money
    But if you aks me, could you have some, Ill say it doesnt concern me
    Ronald Reagan came up to me and said, do you have the answer
    To the united states economy and a cure for cancer?
    I said, what are you doin in the white house if youre not sellin cocaine?
    Ask your wife, Nancy Reagan, I know shell spit that game.
    Like one night, she came to my house, and gave me a blow job
    She licked my dick, up and down, like it was corn on the cob
    What is life? it is too $hort
    I play the bitches like its a sport
    Yea, Ill play the bitches just like yall
    Like dr. j played basketball
    You can call me too, dont say it twice
    Youll get me real mad and Ill fuck your wife
    You see Im not proper, Im rarely polite
    Too $hort, too $hort, dont say it tonight, beeatch
    It started on a bright morning in 1987
    I was in my drop-to caddy yall
    Gettin sucked by a bitch named helen
    Nasty bitches, around the world, I wrote this rhyme for you
    You might not like my rap, but Im tellin you bitch its true
    So much death in the oakland streets
    Am I gonna live till next week?
    Will I get shot by a dope fiend,
    Tryin to get high, tryin to steal my ring
    I really cant say, cause I dont know why
    People out here droppin dead like flies
    I used to see a home boy givin five
    Now I say, man, you still alive?
    Cold as hell, the town Im from
    Wont last too long when youre fakin the funk
    Im the master rapper, so unique
    Clap my hand when I want my freak
    You cant deny it, you know Im right
    I turn any rapper out when Im on the mic
    And I wont kick back, or relax
    Till he knows Im the best at the mc rap
    Till he knows too short, set the track
    They got him caught up in my serious cap
    Motherfucker cant spit straight game on the mic
    Cause hes worse than a fag or a frisco dike
    Hes a sucker mc, I call him punk
    You try to spit that rap, you can scratch that junk
    You little punk-ass boy, wouldnt listen to me
    Think Im fakin but Im takin all you sucker mcs
    To the end of the world and push you over
    Good luck couldnt find you in a four leaf clover
    If I ever said a rap, tryin to cap on you,
    I wouldnt even sweat it cause youll be through
    Lookin so far up, you might fall down
    Gettin clowned by the hound from east oaktown
    And the look in your face when youre lickin that tooth
    Could make a grown man die, laughin at you
    Cause youre a, no rappin, no rhymin
    Played out fake ass simple simon
    I never understood one word you said
    But youre swearin up and down that youre killin em dead
    Theres only one thing, I wanted to know
    Sucker motherfucker, wheres the joke?
    Im the player of players, just call me pop
    My name is too $hort, no I dont stop
    I just dont stop mackin, dont stop cappin
    Dont stop rappin now you see what happens
    Your mind is gone, your crew just cut
    Sucker mc Ill tell you what
    Your rhymes are weak, your rap the same
    And when it comes to game, you are lame
    Never even heard of too $hort baby
    Hit oakland in 1980
    Singin mo raps than a rap could rhyme
    Tellin sucker mcs dont waste my time
    Theres a girl I know her name is betty
    Straight to the head just rock it steady
    Shes so freaky shell juice you up
    All the home boys just cant get enough
    Shes a ph.d., dont even stop
    In the back like that goin (top, top, top)
    I wont say white girl, wont say shes black
    Shes the kind of girl that make your knees go crack
    Feel the beat, rock with me
    Let me tell you what I be
    Im a mc rapper, a mc rapper
    A big bank roller and a cold, cold capper
    Hey baby, I got this rhyme
    Its not gonna stop till the end of time
    Like rock and roll Ill play that song
    To the beat all day and all night long
    So liten up, to what Im sayin
    Im a oaktown mack, bitch I aint playin
    To all the home boys doin time in the pen
    Gonna rock this beat for you once again
    If you cant get out and youre mad as hell
    Say beeatch, now make it sound for real
    Ima tear shit up, if I get the chance
    I could give a fuck less if youre hole dont dance
    See Im a big mack now, Im so great
    I was born and raised in the golden state
    Call me t.o.o., if you say $hort
    Ima rap my ass off till you give me some more
    Big bank, now just make me rich
    Bitch bitch bitch bitch make me rich
    Check out my style, baby I dont quit
    I heard this freak say, thats the shit,
    He took the cake, fucked the rake
    Too $hort baby damn sure aint fake.
    But the sucker mcs are screamin loud
    Sayin sir too $hort, shut your mouth
    How can you talk about me, and call me weak
    When your father smokes coke and you mothers a freak
    So I keep on rappin, if nothin else
    Keep your jealous thoughts to yourself
    Bitch and bitch, hes a mc right
    Aint sayin nothin but hes holdin the mic
    Fuck with me, and boy youre doomed
    I send a trick with a hoe to the motel room
    Cause Im the coldest mc on a microphone
    Like a .357 pointed at your dome
    I got cap for cap, you never heard
    So fresh again with cusswords
    Motherfuckin shit, fuckin with me
    Fuck a skank bitch and a sucker mc

    Cusswords, just let em know
    Motherfuckin shit, God damn ass hoe
    Cusswords, just dont quit
    Motherfuck you damn shithead bitch
    Its too $hort, on the mic, and it dont stop
    And it dont stop, and it wont stop, beeatch
    Check out my style

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  42. eisensteisn

    There goes e-trade

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  43. takingprofit

    WHERE IS CHAMPAGNE LIFESTYLE?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  44. The Fly

    The champagne lifestyle had to be cancelled due to the recession

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  45. arch

    alot of people died for your freedom of speech and wish they could exercise that freedom….so build a bridge and get the fuck over it……

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  46. The Fly

    Build what bridge? I walk over water, didn’t you know?

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  47. arch

    i know you walk over water but i dont should i get in the fazmobile??? not thinking i should but what do i know

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  48. arch

    i started a small position in FAS today ..got home and there it was..then read your posts fly ..and now got both screens full of stock shit .. but not to worry there is still room on the big monitor for a poker tourney

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  49. arch

    still not seeing any signs of a recession ..

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  50. arch

    FLY,
    my build a bridge comment wasnt intended for you…was intended for the prissy folk

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"
  51. Po Pimp

    *** iBankCoin will feature fewer words that are illegal to God and all of his sheep ***

    He’s your God, they’re your rules… YOU burn in hell.

    ‘Tis all.

    • 0
    • 0
    • 0 Deem this to be "Fake News"