THANKSGIVING SURPRISE!

Not too much different than “surprise sex,” North Korea has shit upon your Thanksgiving Day dinner. That’s not black truffle on your dinner plate!

There are no words or explanations for sudden war, just days before America’s most holy holiday. It’s like a sick joke of sorts, upping the level of difficulty of this tape by a factor of 1,000. ,”Sure, let’s throw those baboons a fucking war to deal with, sponsored by a fucking lunatic with nuclear weapons,” said the perverted stock God. I guess this is how the playbook goes: FULL EMPLOYMENT via egregious war. What’s next, dust bowls and locust swarms?

Sell all Korean names. I have a post with keyword and domicile search up in The PPT.

Lucky for me, I step into today’s trade with a 35% cash position. Do not envy me, good sir, I am simply above your pay grade.

With all of the bullshit taking place in Ireland and now Korea, it’s probably best you avoid the market in the near term. Granted, I will not heed my own advice. I will likely buy some shit today or hedge via FAZ or SCO. Nonetheless, things are about to get interesting.

Flotek management meets with institutional investors tomorrow, 7:30am, at the NYSE. I suspect the shares have been spiraling higher in anticipation of God himself upgrading the shares to an “Apocalyptic Buy.” As said inside of The PPT, I’ve been selling into this surge. As a matter of fact, I’ve been selling considerable size and it has not stopped the stock from making new highs. How many shares have I sold so far? Sorry, that’s for members only.

Private equity rumors are swirling around JCG. I believe them and I think consolidation will continue. After all, if you are a large corporation with “fuck you bucks,” what else will you do with your billions? Treasuries? Fuck that. Go buy retail chains, who have decent balance sheets and vast portfolios of property, then lever that shit up and pay yourself a big fat dividend. That’s America, pal. Like it or not, this shit will continue.

In this type of tape, you just need to discard reason and let the testosterone guide you. If you overthink your trades, you’re gonna be shining my shoes. Should my PSUN trade lower tomorrow, Greeks will buy more and the shares will recover. Also, I am now saddled with a very large cash position and have no place to put it. Things are humming along at a brisk pace.

Going into year end, I’m interested in buying beaten down commodity names, with large short positions, readying to ramp.

PPT members, here is your screen.

Some names worth a look:

REXX, CRK, AKS, ATPG, CENX, JAG

[youtube:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=72-jU9gIDlg 616 500]

Developing…

I bought 30,000 REXX in the $12.30’s.

Disclaimer: Buy this stock and get hit with a meteorite.

There is nothing like gardening in the cold air. While you drunken idiots run for the exits, Senor Tropicana is busy building his position. As we speak, his position is one of pomp and circumstance.

As the fragrances of candied sweet potatoes sweeps the country, so does stupid. This is the time of year when everyone is a rockstar. Nothing goes wrong because it can’t. So why fret over positions?

Answer: because stupid is sweeping the country like dark clouds of locusts, who are only interested in gray matter.

Yes, I bought size in CIEN and THQI. Yes, I am riding with PSUN to the sun, in my car made from dynamite sticks, into earnings. Am I scared?

Answer: No, because I can’t lose.

Do I mean that literally?

Answer: yes I do (see FTK).

See pal, life is all about kicking unsuspecting old guys, who are in wheeled chairs, down sewer pipes or  into oncoming traffic. I do not make friends with people; I defeat them. I do not reach out “the hand of kindess,” but bitch slap them.

If you want advice, heed this: stop listening to yourself and start paying attention to people who drive space rockets around at night.

Back to my garden.

There is no need to panic, in my estimation. This pullback is of the garden variety. Clearly, there is a bid under this market. Look at heavily short tech names, like CIEN, OPEN or NFLX: sheer hell for short sellers. As you know, I added to a few names, namely CIEN, in order to take advantage of said squeeze. There is not much to say here, other than I am managing my positions in a very responsible manner. Those of you inside The PPT know exactly what I mean.

Ten thousand thank you’s to the Turkey Gods for blessing my FTK position with money flavored gravy.

Having said that, I have zero hedges going into Turkey Day. Moreover, should the market pullback today, I will be a buyers. I’ve told you ball suckers multiple times, I trade on a thesis. Even though I was tilted head sideways stupid in VXX last month, I never go into Thanksgiving short.  I just don’t do it.

Top pick: CIEN

I started a new position in CIEN, buying 100,000 at these levels. And, I added to my PSUN and THQI positions.

Disclaimer: If you buy the above stocks because of this post, you will fall victim to a case of mistaken identity and subsequent mafia hit. And, you may lose money.

Ireland is getting a bailout equal to 60% of their GDP and futures are hardly red. I know they were up a lot last night; but who pays attention to that shit? So now we’ve bailed out Greece and Ireland, yet the market keeps goose-stepping higher. I suspect after a Portuguese bailout the Dow can break out above 12,000?

I am not ecstatic about the bailout; but will it stop me from eating my morning bowl of oatmeal? Nah, not really. Will the Irish people stop drinking whiskey for breakfast, KIDS INCLUDED? Nah, I sincerely doubt it. Ever since those fuckers put down the cow tits, in exchange for business attire, it’s been all downhill for them. Hey Ireland, quit trying to play “fancy business man” and go farm me some potatoes. Let it be known, any Irish relatives of mine would be greatly chagrined by my comments. However, no one in my family reads this website.  Therefore, I am without boundaries.

Going into today’s trade, I am long PSUN, THQI, FTK, LIZ, GMXR, WFR, just to name a few. I’m thinking about shorting oil here too. It’s really too early to make predictions. However, think about it, it’s not that bad.

In the end, The Turkey Gods always win.

I sold out of all of my Chinese Lotto tickets a few weeks ago when the accounting starting to smell fishy. Now the shit is hitting the fan. Sometime soon ALL said shit will be distributed across the entire industry, leaving their snowmen shareholders in puddles. Expect and anticipate sharp percentage losses in all things Chinese, as America turns their noses, high and mighty, towards the fucked up accounting practices of the lotto masters.

One thing is for certain, anyone audited by RINO‘s accounting magicians will be punished and scrutinized. Truth be told, I did zero forensic analysis on this subject, just ran some quick PPT auditor screens and this is what I came up with:

RINO accounting firm: Frazer Frost, formerly Moore Stephens Frazer & Torbet LLP

Other companies audited by said magicians: CBPO, DYP, FSIN, CFSG, HRBN, CHNG, CVVT.

Is it possible that such a firm audits only Chinese small cap companies, of which several have already reported “accounting irregularities?” Coincidence or by design?

Typically, I’d like to buy into a situation like this, where good names are punished because of poor company. However, if the accounting firm gets shut down, I’m afraid all of these stocks will suffer greatly. The best trade is probably to stay away. I just wanted to do a public service and let you idiots know what’s up, before you started dip buying into those fucking murderholes.

In other news, I’m interested in companies that have publicly traded warrants. BAC has a bunch, as does WFC. Others are more obscure. This is what I found:

(using quotestream terminal)

TLB.ws (TLB)

MVISW (MVIS)

PALWF (PAL)

AVIIW (AVII)

CHOPW (CHOP)

COF.ws (COF)

ZIONW (ZION)

It looks like the drunken Irish jackasses will be bailed out. Hooray, just in time for the Turkey Gods. NEVER, EVER bet against the Turkey Gods, for they will beat you senseless with their stuffing packed cocks.

In light of my FTK triumph, I will close out today’s blog with a video.

“The Fly” versus Ham and Eggers