My incorrigible birthday has ended and I am now permitted, by extension of a full day’s efforts at the house, to have a single beer. Through the day, on my 43rd birthday, I scrubbed baseboards and crown molding — positioned myself atop very tall ladders and fought back my phobia of heights and scrubbed some more. I am happy to report, the browning at the top of my vaulted ceilings have been eradicated and with it our homeless man aesthetic.
It was a very busy day at House Fly, one marked by toil and extreme fasting. After my large bowl of sugary cereal, I didn’t have an opportune to indulge myself in caloric intake until late at night — in a visit to a place called “Tacoria” in Princeton. It was quite delicious — and I was even permitted to refill my glass with an extra serving of linomade. I was allowed to do this, not because it was my birthday — but because it was store policy. Nevertheless, I felt quite special having been given this opportune to quench my thirst at such a rapid and capricious rate.
The realtor had a photographer come over today and snap photos of the house — and I’m not sure the photographer had a single idea what he was doing — but the show must go on. Starting tomorrow, there is a major project being planned to “thin out” the closets, in order to make them more presentable. It’s important to do a good job all the time and never to slack or rest — for those are qualities of the devil and the devil is evil and evil is bad and bad is just bad.
My throat burns from all of the chemicals I’ve been inhaling throughout the day — but I am told it will pass and that I should remedy this affliction with high doses of store bought pharmaceuticals.
I’m sipping my last beer now — because that’s all that was left in the fridge. I don’t think it’d be prudent to crack open a bottle of whiskey — because that might delay my early rise tomorrow and disrupt productivity. We didn’t bother with birthday cakes this year — because it’s child’s play. The blowing out of candles and blissfully wishing other’s well and joyfully acknowledging a family member’s date of birth is, more or less, outdated and also inconvenient. Efficient love is most effectively expressed through wanton toil and fastidious attention to dusty crevices and aggressively mollifying hardened discord through a job well done.
Off to shower for exactly 13 minutes, followed by 8 hours of middling sleep.If you enjoy the content at iBankCoin, please follow us on Twitter