Ackma stroyed

It kind of reminds me a little bit of a spoiled brat in school asking the teacher for an extension for their homework,” Rodriguez said on “Squawk on the Street” in an interview with David Faber.

Rodriguez said Ackman requested a 30- to 45-day extension on the nomination deadline, then revised it down to a week, but then added he might need more time after that.

Rodriguez said Ackman called him to lay out “a series of reasons why” Rodriguez should not be CEO.

“I honestly can’t make heads or tails of what’s going on,” Rodriguez said. “What it feels like is I’m negotiating with someone about buying a used car. And this is not a used car. This is a company that has 58,000 employees, $50 billion market cap and a lot of shareholders that we have of responsibility toward.”

Rodriguez said the company is in the process of scheduling a meeting with Ackman in “early September.”

The two men attended Harvard together, but despite suggestions they may be friends, Rodriguez said he met Ackman “once, 31 years ago in college” and is not on “his holiday greeting card list as far as I can tell.”

Last week, Omega Advisors Chairman and CEO Leon Cooperman, who served on ADP’s board for two decades through 2012, told Ackman not to interfere with the payroll processor’s operations. Rodriguez was named CEO in 2011.

“This is a quality management that has done a great job over many years for the shareholders,” Cooperman wrote in an email to Ackman. The email was obtained by CNBC’s Scott Wapner. “The idea that you can tell these guys how to run their business doesn’t strike me as intelligent or appropriate.”

Rodriguez said ADP was open to ideas Ackman had for improving the business, but noted that the activist’s information so far seemed to come mostly from “disgruntled, former employees.”

“I’m directly saying he doesn’t know what he’s talking about,” Rodriguez told CNBC on Thursday. “Frankly we haven’t heard any ideas yet because he wasn’t ready to share his ideas, but should he have come up with something or stumbled on some kind of idea that would enhance the value of ADP, of course we’re going to listen to him.”

Shares of ADP came off session lows to trade about 0.3 percent lower at midday Thursday after the interview. Shares are down nearly 9 percent for the month.

In a statement Friday, ADP compared it six-year stock performance under Rodriguez to Pershing Square’s hedge fund returns from 2012 to 2016.

“Since Carlos Rodriguez became CEO nearly six years ago, ADP’s total shareholder return of 202% is well in excess of the S&P 500 TSR of 128% – and is many multiples of Pershing’s TSR of 29%.”

What a pleasant occasion. Here I am sashaying (no homo) up the northeast corridor of the United States, amidst turmoil and tumult, and markets are collapsing. It’s like God is really looking out for me — offering me presents for being so good this year. I expect to arrive in Massachusetts soon, at which point I will parlay in Salem, MA to purchase large quantities of macrons and orange jam this delightful little French bakery in the city.

Markets are getting punched out — and for good reason. We’re gonna have another Korean War!

The NASDAQ is down 100, led lower by FAANG stocks, which are down 2.1%.

Gold and bonds are the only refuge. Presently, I have 10% of my assets in GLD/TLT and another 20% in cash. You can see why I am eager for lower prices.

Retail is literally blowing up, with larger than life losses in DDS, M and SHLD. When they die, you’ll miss them and rue the day Amazon.com was born.

On the plus side is the VIX, heavily fagged out for a long time, now rejuvenated and acting alpha.

Up 30% for the day, so far.

Both TVIX and UVXY are supposed to give investors 3x VIX, but because they’re retarded products, they’re producing less than 1x.

From the semis to solar back to your local apparel shop, everything gets blown out and stomped during nuclear war. Do not bargain with The Devil, you might not like the results.

While we wait for the war mongering pigs to foment strife and ritualistic carnage in Asia, you should be waiting for an Exodus OS signal.

As we speak, the system is oversold on its 3,6 and 12 month signals. We only wait for the 36 month to trigger, before we take action. For those deeply concerned, our track record is one of flawless victory over the past 12 months. As a point in fact, our data suggests that you should go long here, hold for 10 days, and then collect the proceeds to do as you please.