Markets Respond to London Attacks: Futures Soft, WTI Flat, Gold Slightly Higher

UPDATE: Because I relied upon the shit site Investing.com for commodity quotes, I inadvertently published FAKE NEWS, which can be found below. While I do apologize for the inconvenience of being mischievously deceived, I do admit to feeling awfully democratic, CNN-like, while doing it. According to recent quotes, WTI is flat, while Gold is higher by 0.25%.

I wonder who bought MOAR gold and bonds on Friday? Surely it wasn’t any of you faggots, tech loving squirrel skinners.

Early going, futures are soft, down 4, but WTI is getting drubbed to the tune of -1.4%. On the upside is gold, as investors scurry for safe havens — currently higher by 1%. Silver is up 1.72%.

European futures are slightly higher — as acts of terror do not stop the good-minded people of the UK or mainland Europe. They will continue their way of life, shopping and driving around on their little scooters, permitting retrogrades to enter their countries to become merchants — all for the love of global unity. Sure, every once in a while some wayward lad might detonate himself in the middle of a cafe; but that is to be expected when living in big, bustling, city.

Surely, you cannot blame all of Islam, as the Christian crusades killed so many more. And, let’s not forget, there is nazi scum amongst you, feverishly plotting to destroy the planet by mining for coal and hardly recycling their white trash beer cans.

While Islam may not be perfect, at least it didn’t produce Timothy Mcveigh (oh, shit, how will you recover from that Jesusfags?)

QED

CNN employs all of the finest people in media. One of their scholars, Reza Aslan, melted the fuck down last night, after Trump called for a travel ban — following the results of the latest Islamic inspired attacks in London.

This is what the President said.

We need to be smart, vigilant and tough. We need the courts to give us back our rights. We need the Travel Ban as an extra level of safety!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 3, 2017

And this is what the CNN said?

Will CNN fire Mr. Aslan for disrespecting the office of the Presidency in such a degenerate and unprofessional manner?

NOTE: Reza’s family immigrated to the United States from Iran during the Iranian revolution in 1979.

Richard Lui from MSNBC, home of the enemy media, asked Mustafa Tameez, former consultant to DHS, if the police response to the London attacks were too extreme. After all, only 7 people were butchered to death, 48 injured. This could hardly be considered an actual event. Bear in mind, over 500,000 people have been slain in Syria and the Christian crusades killed a gorillion people. Ergo, this is merely part of living in a big city — like a burglar on your fire escape knifing all of your neighbors to pieces.

Here’s an eyewitness account of the events in London.

Aren’t you glad to have that giant ocean between you and the nutjobs in Europe?

Three men mowed people down and exited their clowncar on the London Bridge and began knifing people to death — screaming ‘this is for Allah’ — and the British media is reporting this as a ‘team’ of lone wolves committing a rather crude, yet heinous, act of terror on the British people. The fellow in the beginning of this clip was rather impressed by the ‘rapid’ response by the British police, only taking 8 fucking minutes to arrive at the scene, where 6 people were murdered, 30 injured.

#LondonAttacks #LondonBridgeAttack British Media reporting terror attack done by a "team" of lone wolves. pic.twitter.com/Mk7QDUga3N

— The_Real_Fly (@The_Real_Fly) June 4, 2017

Multiculturalism is necessary, so that banks can issue credit cards and student loans. Anyone who views this attack as some sort of depraved Islamic orgy of human sacrifice isn’t seeing the profit opportunity of having these pavement apes man factory machinery and bankrupt themselves under a mountain of 35% yielding plastic card bank debt.

Eyewitness accounts

“3 men of Mediterranean colouring”

It’s a delightful day outside, so I have little reason to cavort with the likes of you on the interwebs. Before I head out again, into the pollen infested world I reside in, I wanted to share Exodus‘ top rated stocks with you.

Here are the top 10 by Hybrid scores, which includes fundamentals scores. And below that will be pure technical, for all of you chart-faggot loving mother llamas.

AAOI, CPRT, MGA, GLW, FIG, DAL, CGA, ORBK, HF, ESL.

WTW, CPRT, TGTX, PBYI, EXAS, AAOI, SHOP, ROX, INVH, XENT.

Any opinions on the aforementioned names? Huh? What do you people do at your housing tenements during summer days? Do you take a wrench to the fire hydrant, open it up and jump inside the stream — as some burly man directs the water at oncoming cars — hoping to cause fatal accidents?

In her first major interview since landing at NBC, a disheveled Megyn Kelly pressed Putin about US interference in John Podesta’s email box. Recoiling from the suggestion, Putin ripped out his earpiece, chastised Megyn for being the ‘gold standard’ in American journalism, and then proceeded to entertain his oligarch filled captive audience, declaring the United States has been ‘Unceremoniously interfering’ in domestic Russian affairs and that it had to stop.

Take that deep state.

The irony of this presser is that it was very funny, much better than her cringeworthy stand up routines. She is, without question, a talentless wench and should be ferried to Guantanamo Bay, to live and to serve, with the rest of the terrorists in our possession.

Here is Kathy Griffin, libshit superstar, ‘apologizing’ to her fans, saying “I’m not going to be collateral damage for this fool”, referring to the President. She then added the administration was using her as a ‘distraction’ and that she didn’t feel her career could recover.

Drenched in faux tears, wrinkly faced and without a spry bone in her body, Griffin declared, “I’m gonna be honest, he broke me. (introspective pause) He broke me.”

She capped off her ‘apology’ by describing how scared all of her friends are of the Giant Orange Menace in the White House, destructor of air and the environment — evil Lord ensconced in a denizen of the middle earth from which toxins are produced and readily disseminated towards impoverished parts of the Universe.

Formerly employed at CNN Fake News, Ms. Griffin sheds fake tears

Watch.

Anyone who’s been reading iBC for more than a week knows the time machine-like talent of our resident options and stock pro, The Option Addict. We’ve been doing these boot camps for two years and I’ve never heard a negative remark. As a matter of fact, people go out of their way to tell me how much it helped them.

These classes aren’t about just giving you ideas, which there will be plenty. It’s about honing your process and teaching you right from wrong — because you’re children and you need instruction — else you’ll blow your accounts up.

You know it and I know it.

Here is the 5 day schedule. Camp starts on June 12th.

Monday: How the Pro’s are Positioned: Fund Flows, Cash and Rotations.

Tuesday: Should You Go Away Or Stay and Play This Summer?

Wednesday: Opportunities and Risks of a Single Digit VIX.

Thursday: Bonds, Gold or Bitcoins?

Friday: Pain Trades and Top Ideas Through 2017.

These are recorded live, so there will be archives for you to access.

Sign up now, else your accounts will go to zero.

I laid out the detail of my new strategy and results in the members only blog.

This week’s highlights include.

I added to TLT/GLD.
I sold all of my positions and bought new ones.
11 out of 13 of my stocks traded up for the week.
I booked gains in COO (+9.97%), ALGN (+4.85%), SIRI (+2.63%), IT (+2.29%) and TDG (+2.12%) amongst others.
My new equity portfolio is smaller capped and just 7 stocks.

I crushed the SPY.

We’re at an odd crossroads here, with both the S&P 500 and U.S. Treasuries climbing at the same time. Typically, they hedge one another. In the past, when stocks traded down, bonds went up and vice versa. Now, the stock market is being jimmy rigged higher by a mega cap charge, which is also creating enough uncertainty to create demand for treasuries. The idea that Trump will get anything done, other than tear apart Obama’s legacy, isn’t something investors are counting on anymore. People are buying AMZN, NFLX, GOOGL, MSFT and AAPL because they think the ride will continue, regardless of an infrastructure bill or tax reform.

But is this a wise bet?

US Bonds yields are at 6 mo lows

I’m tempted to start buying zero coupons bonds to capture the beta in the bond market now, via ZROZ, but have abstained because, deep down, I do not believe the bond market has much upside. The market might take the month off for June, especially since the broader indices are overdue to digest their gains, which might lead to MOAR gains in GLD/TLT.

I’ll be making my adjustments in Exodus today, swapping out of my current cadre of stocks for a new set, likely adding to both GLD/TLT in the process.